Page 5 | Life isn't short!

Original poster

Bluepinkyellowcakes · 31/10/2021 07:45

@ABitOfAShitShow

I totally understand, OP. I’ve literally just said similar to my mum. It all just feels so relentless. I can’t do the number of years I’ve already done again.

OP posts:

knittingaddict · 31/10/2021 08:44

It jolly well is. Very short.

I am late 50's and husband is late 60's. Husband got cancer in 2008, had treatment for years and still has checkups. That's a bit of a wakeup call. We have been married for over 35 years and are very happy. I can't believe how quickly that time has flown by.

I'm not maudlin about it, but death does feel closer and when I think about one of us dying I can get quite upset about it. Can't imagine life without him and having to experience him dying is a bit devastating.

Also all the things I haven't done and places I will probably never go to now. Life is so, so short.

knittingaddict · 31/10/2021 08:49

Maybe the difference is that, despite a stressful last few years I am quite content with life. Not rich by any means, but we've never had any real money worries. When money was short we could cut back, live simply and get by. Our marriage has been happy and we both have hobbies that make us happy. I think the ability to be happy and content is a gift. Not everyone has that, through no fault of their own.

LucentBlade · 31/10/2021 09:27

I did loads until I was 50 when health issues appeared.

Nursing for 5 years, did part time modelling at the same time, wanted a career change went to University as a mature student so moved 250 miles, married, relocated again, new career, had DS, tried many hobbies for fun including pottery, belly dancing, watercolours, did lots of hill walking baby was in backpack, travelled abroad on hols almost every year from age 30 to 50. Was a trade union activist for a decade, met quite a lot of politicians because of this and because of new career. Supported a motion at national conference and spoke in front of a thousand people.Helped set up a charity in my town that’s still running after almost a decade. Done voluntary work for women’s aid and Age UK. Studied an OU course for fun, researched my family tree back to 1785, streamed games I play but got harassed online. I had an actual online stalker because of this. Played a lot of sport till I started nursing, just couldn’t do it because of work shifts. Had done a lot of running and studied karate for two years and also played hockey.

I lost two very beloved relatives within 12 weeks of each other when I was in my mid forties one was only in their twenties and then three years ago my beautiful amazing friend dropped dead from a blood clot aged 41.

When I was a teenager in sixth form I worked for a few months in a residential home. I used to run home because I still could and seeing those old folk who could hardly move made me appreciate life a lot. I loved hearing their tales. I realise now that some of them may have been born in the late 1880’s. That experience made me grasp life with gusto.

Original poster

Bluepinkyellowcakes · 31/10/2021 09:34

@LucentBlade 😮 wow, you've been busy! Do you still have things you want to do?
I can't think of anything I really want to do, nor anywhere I'd especially like to go. Just keep on ticking days off 😂

OP posts:

DaisyNGO · 31/10/2021 11:21

[quote Bluepinkyellowcakes]@LucentBlade 😮 wow, you've been busy! Do you still have things you want to do?
I can't think of anything I really want to do, nor anywhere I'd especially like to go. Just keep on ticking days off 😂[/quote]
I have stuff I love doing

I lost a couple of friends in my 20s - and their 20s.

that is tragic in a way. But increasingly I realise - not for them. They will never grow old and they had a good life albeit short ones.

I just think some people are more attached to life than others. I am quite happy but long life scares me and daily life is hard.

I think this is probably a common view but it's one that few people express.

Fluffyteal272 · 31/10/2021 12:04

I also think it depends on what kind of life you live. I've had a chronic disease since I was 16, it makes life incredibly difficult. I've been very ill this year and it's felt like the longest year of my life. I'm not sure I've got the energy to battle this for potentially another 40 years!

OrangeBananaFish · 31/10/2021 12:29

I feel the same as you OP. Life is just dragging on right now, but then again (as suggested by PPs) my mental health isn't in a good place right now. I honestly am not looking forward to another year of this shit let alone 30/40+ (I'm early 40's)

For me though, I know I need to change something, just haven't figured out what or how.

Original poster

Bluepinkyellowcakes · 31/10/2021 12:33

I do need to change some things, not sure how either. Not sure it will make much difference though.

OP posts:

Waxonwaxoff0 · 31/10/2021 12:38

God, no. I feel like I've lost 2 years of my life due to Covid and there is still so much I want to do.

RosieLemonade · 31/10/2021 12:47

I think it depends what kind of life you have. For example there is loads I would love to be able to do but will never be able to afford. If I knew I could do them I would be anxious to fit them all in. As it stands all we do is work with the odd days out with DC so life is quite dull and long!

ssd · 31/10/2021 12:53

Same here. There's loads i can think to do, but it all involves money. I'd love to travel. Its ok saying you need to do everything whilst you can but sometimes its not possible

PhilCornwall1 · 31/10/2021 13:03

I know most people say life is short, but i disagree.

How much time do you have left? You don't know.

A very good friend of mine spent his 30 and two years of his 40s paying off his mortgage and that was his sole aim.

He achieved this and had a very nice mortgage free house. I remember well him saying that he can now start living and really enjoying himself. Six weeks later he was dead.

Fetchthevet · 31/10/2021 13:14

I'm fast approaching 50 and I wish I could go back to my 20s. I'd do lots of things differently, mainly not worrying so much about what others think, and just getting on with things quicker. I always felt like I had lots of time, so I used to put things off. I had a heart scare last year though, and it really put things in perspective. Try to make the most of each day OP and not worry too much about the future. (Easier said than done I know.)

makelovenotpetrol · 31/10/2021 13:20

Hopefully you don't go through something to make you realise life IS short then OP. When you've lost a child you think differently.

If you don't think life is short then I think I'd count myself lucky

MadamMaltesers · 31/10/2021 13:56

Make me think about the purpose of our creation and the purpose of life, there has to be more to life

wombatspoopcubes · 31/10/2021 13:57

@Bluepinkyellowcakes

Just thinking, I'm in my 30s so probably not even halfway through it yet. The thought of another 35, 40+ years... 😮 The time I've done already plus even longer on top?! It seems to stretch out like a never ending road. Anyone else feel like that? I know most people say life is short, but i disagree.

Next month you're in your 40s

Original poster

Bluepinkyellowcakes · 31/10/2021 13:59

@makelovenotpetrol

Hopefully you don't go through something to make you realise life IS short then OP. When you've lost a child you think differently.

If you don't think life is short then I think I'd count myself lucky

Ouch. I can't imagine anything worse than losing one of my children

OP posts:

makelovenotpetrol · 31/10/2021 19:06

@Bluepinkyellowcakes well I'm very glad for you that you haven't experienced much loss like you say. For those of us who have this kind of thread really stings. I must remember to try and avoid. But I'm glad you're so happy.

user1471554720 · 31/10/2021 19:15

Life can feel very long when you are in a tough day to day routine with little down time or enjoyment. I used to feel like this as a teenager, studying for exams, plenty of chores ar home and no social life. My 40s went very slowly as I work fulltime and had two dcs. I felt there was little enjoyment, always working or looking after dcs and trying to fit in housework among dcs activities at the weekend.

If you feel the daily grind is depressing, try to take a day off work here and there and book an outing, something to look forward to.

Original poster

Bluepinkyellowcakes · 31/10/2021 20:41

[quote makelovenotpetrol]@Bluepinkyellowcakes well I'm very glad for you that you haven't experienced much loss like you say. For those of us who have this kind of thread really stings. I must remember to try and avoid. But I'm glad you're so happy.[/quote]
Hey, I'm really sorry that my musings have upset you, I never intended to upset anyone. I can't imagine how tough it must have been for you. For what it's worth I'm not happy, not at all and have had many really rubbish times in my life and it doesn't look like it will get easier any time soon. Obviously that still doesn't compare to actually losing a child. Nothing I can say will make that better, but I genuinely am sorry if I made you feel worse by posting about how I see my life. x

OP posts:

userxx · 01/11/2021 07:06

@Bluepinkyellowcakes Sounds like you're having a shit time at the moment, hope things turn around for you soon.

Original poster

Bluepinkyellowcakes · 01/11/2021 07:29

Thanks userxx

OP posts:

Fluffyteal272 · 01/11/2021 07:32

makelovenotpetrol this thread is clearly not about the OP (or any of us who understand her feelings) saying that she is so happy she doesn't appreciate how short life is. If anything we're saying that life is difficult, it feels like a long road to travel. I 100% agree with the OP and I've experienced loss. My life, the cards I've been delt make life tough, time flies when you're having fun. If you live a life with little fun in it (for any number of reasons) then it can feel like it goes very slowly at times.

makelovenotpetrol · 01/11/2021 07:33

@Fluffyteal272

makelovenotpetrol this thread is clearly not about the OP (or any of us who understand her feelings) saying that she is so happy she doesn't appreciate how short life is. If anything we're saying that life is difficult, it feels like a long road to travel. I 100% agree with the OP and I've experienced loss. My life, the cards I've been delt make life tough, time flies when you're having fun. If you live a life with little fun in it (for any number of reasons) then it can feel like it goes very slowly at times.

Ok. Well I can take it how I want can't I.