Anyone follow the coverage of the Sarah Everard case today and want to vent?

[HangingOver]

I'm home alone today and except for whatsapping my friends have nothing to do with this incandescent rage and hopeless sadness.

Anyone else need to talk?

I'm sad, I'm angry the fear that woman must have felt, that feeling of impending doom when she must have realised "this is it, this is how I die". It's horrific.

Whilst you can't ask for a female officer you can ask for another officer to attend, then you can ask to be spoken to in a station and transported in a police vehicle. Arrests are never made by sole officers, neither are enquiries these days to the public.

It's madness that as women we have to read up on our rights regarding the very service that is there for public protection. It angers me beyond belief.

That's what I think too. Any of us could've been Sarah that night.

Agree about “flashing” - happened to me when I was 11 and nobody took it seriously even though there was a group of us and we reported it immediately to school. I don’t recall our parents being told or the police becoming involved.

The poor witnesses understandably will be haunted by this but they did absolutely nothing wrong. Maybe we’ll all be quicker to step in sometimes but this looked official (handcuffs) and they thought reasonably it was an mm plain clothes officer. Really feel for them.

The victim impact statements from her family hit you in the stomach I can’t begin to imagine how they feel poor poor Sarah

[quote PompomDahlia]@Keke94LND but then for people of colour, going to Brixton Station wouldn’t have been a comfort given all the ‘suspicious’ deaths in custody over the years for which no one ever got held accountable. The system needs a huge overhaul - there is such abuse of power[/quote]
Ah tbh I don't know much about that! Maybe I'll have a research, I just know that that's the nearest station and not actually THAT far from where she was taken or where she lives :(

Sadly this would leave some people in danger, being a woman shouldn’t enable you to drive off drunk, carry on damaging property etc. It also wouldn’t go anywhere to solving the issue of police brutality.

Thanks for your manly explanation of why it's unworkable. That's just great. Of course there would be exceptions for where a woman was endangering herself or others. Jesus.

@MrsRobbieHart

just something that's not about women being murdered.

I feel like screaming this at the TV most evenings. “Dramas” about women being killed by men seem to be on every other fucking channel. Or “murder file” shows or Netflix documentaries. They’re normalising the murder of women as entertainment.

I think there is something in this too.

And the normalisation of male / female fight scenes - in the Nevers and many of the modern series on these channels, lots of them aimed at teens and young adults. Where the women and men fight each other and women tend to come out victorious- wouldn’t happen often in real life, as as much as no one ever wants to admit it anymore men are generally physically stronger. It’s like we’re being brainwashed to think women can take men on and therefore if men need to fight back that’s okay… I hate it all.

"completely agree with you re flashing. I actually think we need to change the language used around flashing and turn it into a serious sexual assault - which it is. Flashing makes it sound funny, and not as serious.

I’ve been “flashed” at in a park before, it was absolutely terrifying and has left me afraid to walk through a park on my own - even though I am now 41 and I was 18 when it happened. My whole life has been altered by that incident.

If a man is prepared to assault a woman in that way it generally follows he will do more next time. Just horrible."

Completely agree, I was 17 when I got 'flashed' and it's stuck with me my whole life, I'm 39 now. That was the night I realised I wasn't safe.

@LukeEvansWife

Its really not a snark - so no, I won't go away.

It is a genuine question. The vigils etc for Sarah were fairly high profile but I want to know what about this specific case has started all of it. I am asking as a woman who sees the world as a dangerous place, but no more so than, say, ten years ago.

If you don't want to answer, that's fine. But no need to be arsey about it.

Really? Why didn’t you ask this question back in March? Why wait until today and pick a space where women need to vent their anger and sadness at today’s news…

There is absolutely a need to be arsed with your post. Read the room, move on and take your post with you

@JaneJeffer

On Sky News it say "cameras from two buses, a refuse lorry and a marked police car caught footage of Couzens talking to her by the car, which was parked on the pavement with its hazard lights on and doors open" How come the police didn't query what was going on?

Given how quickly he was arrested, the police pretty obviously had him badged as a suspect very early on. Probably because of this precise footage.

The police behaved appallingly at the vigil, and the met is culpable for not taking his warrant card the day he was accused of indecent exposure, but I don't think you can accuse the police of not following up on the leads.

And the normalisation of male / female fight scenes - in the Nevers and many of the modern series on these channels, lots of them aimed at teens and young adults. Where the women and men fight each other and women tend to come out victorious- wouldn’t happen often in real life, as as much as no one ever wants to admit it anymore men are generally physically stronger. It’s like we’re being brainwashed to think women can take men on and therefore if men need to fight back that’s okay… I hate it all.

I had this exact thought at the weekend when I watched Gemini man. I turned it off. I have no interest in supporting this stuff anymore.

They knew it was him from the get go I think. They acted toooo quickly.

I thought nothing could shock me any more but this has, to my very core. I am grateful to the OP because it’s helpful to hear the comments from others that share the rage and sense of helplessness that I feel.

I too am feeling totally gutted. It is extra shocking because he was supposed to protect her. The fact that he staged an 'arrest' shows such premeditated cruelty. I too, am very angry at the Met for not moving quicker once he had committed indecent assault. It feels like a year of industrial scale misogyny.

@Mogs43

Three times he was reported to the police (Kent Police and the Met) for indecent exposure- the police had three opportunities to stop him but did nothing. This mustn't be ignored. Yes he was evil but procedures were either not followed or not in place that allowed him carry on with his violence towards women escalating.

Police statements saying how sad they are blah blah blah are not enough. They had opportunities to tackle him but failed. This must not just be dismissed as the work of a mad man - he was allowed to carry on as a police officer despite have three allegations of indecent exposure against him. How? The Police must be held accountable for failings.

I recently read a report in The Times that at least 15 women have been killed by police officers in the last 12 years. That is a huge cause of concern. This is not just a one off- we shouldn't allow our concerns to be brushed off.

This is an excellent post

I just wanted to add at my fury of some of the police press releases and interviews.

mobile.twitter.com/SkyNews/status/1443199259399049220

I'm hoping my link works.
The police officer says (and I'm paraphrasing)
"we don't see him as a police officer. We see him as a murderer who happened to be a police officer, rather than a police officer who is a murderer"

Maybe I'm being unfair, but I'm so angry at this.
They are using the whole "one bad apple" excuse. By doing this they are not accepting or willing to look into misogyny, sexism, boys will be boys culture within the police force.

Unacceptable

It’s terrifying that men like Couzens roam the earth, let alone manage to get themselves into the police. My heart breaks for Sarah and her family, absolutely sickening what was done to her and to them. How can any woman trust a police man again? And I know not all men blah blah blah but these crimes are not committed by women.

I agree about not using ‘flashing’ and sorry I was brought up before it was seen as seriously as it is. Indecent exposure is what it is. First for me was before I was sexually myself so I kind of laughed it off on the surface but I was shocked and frightened. Second time I was in mid 50s and angry and immediately reported it as there is really clear link between this and more serious sexual assaults including rape.

Just catching up now. I am burning with rage.

@DoraMaude

It's one of the worst things I've ever read. That poor woman. However he is the one to blame - I don't think we should diminish this in any way by seeking to hold anyone else to account. He is an evil man who was entirely responsible for this. Not all men. Not the police.

Not all men but ALWAYS MEN

I have cried so much today and wanted to scream in anger. Who are we to trust? I just can’t stop thinking about how terrified she must have been.

Re the TV shows all being about women being raped and murdered: I've recently realised why I enjoy watching Strictly Come Dancing. It's because the male dancers' greater physical strength is basically used to facilitate the woman's dancing. The lifts and turns. They showcase the women's skills but are reliant on the men being strong. It's just nice to see men's physical strength (when it's relevant) being used to raise women and move them about safely rather than to beat them up, rape them or murder them.

Sarah's mother's statement was heartbreaking. The pain that family must have gone through and will always go through because of this piece of shit.

For me, the Sarah Everard case is now basically 'there but for the grace of God...'
If a police officer arrested me for breaking any sort of regulations, showing a valid warrant card, I would've accepted it.
Likewise, seeing someone being arrested in passing - it wouldn't occur to me that I was in fact seeing an abduction.
I guess it's a massive amount of naivety on my part.
Her poor family.

@NoLongerADoormat

They knew it was him from the get go I think. They acted toooo quickly.

He managed to completely wipe his phone mere minutes before he was arrested. Sure the timing was coincidence...

My stomach dropped when I read this earlier. I’m absolutely devastated for her family, I just can’t imagine the horror they must have felt on hearing how she died. How can any woman trust the police now?