Shamed at the Duck pond.

[GiveMeAUserName123]

Took my kids to the duck pond today as we accidentally let close to a whole loaf of bread go mouldy. Instead of waste it I thought we could give it to the ducks…..well!

Got there and there was a mum, who if you was to judge on the spot came across as one of those perfect, kind, loving hippy mums with polite kids, she was handing her children what could only be described as real duck feed, they were pellet like and brown.

Also there across the pond was a dad with his young kid, about 4, throwing in peas from a brown kfraft box that has obviously been recycled.

Then us, I’m married, but if you was to judge there and then, a single mum, standing there with her two kids throwing bread into the pond out of the plastic wrapper, with (very slight) mould. Completely inorganic and clearly not saving the world.

The young 4 year old said “ducks don’t eat bread” to his dad who was in ear shot of us, he replied that they do sometimes eat bread as he was obviously being polite to us.

Since when did parents become so perfect?

Just felt like a huge fail as we crossed back over the bridge to read a sign that said “bread kills ducks.”

(My kids didn’t notice the sign thank god!)

🤦🏼‍♀️ Fail

@RickySpanishhh

What responses were you looking for, op?

“Hahahahaha you’re so hilarious”

”Yeah, those bloody judgmental parents are always judging me. Who do they think they are? Bastards minding their own business with their bird seed”

“Nowt wrong with mouldy bread. Bloody snowflakes complaining about mould. The ducks are snowflakes too for letting the mould kill them”

Yeah, fucking snowflake birds eh? no wonder they all fly bloody South! lentil-wearing remoaners, no doubt. Not like the tough old birds up Norf.

@Mariell
"More embarrassing for me is the outrage my dog has that anyone could throw perfectly good food into the water and the first time I fed ducks with him, he looked panic stricken and plunged into the water to retrieve the bread and devour it!"

Haha 😄 my dog would be the same, in fact he would chase off the ducks, just to guard the bread!

The post is about being at the duck pond and not knowing you can’t feed bread when everyone else got the memo.

So why did you think we all need to know that you're married and not a (shock!) single parent

What's the for @mariell - as I said we do feed small amounts of bread to our ducks along with many other things. My issue is with mouldy bread

"I'm married but looked like a single mum"

Don't bother yourselves ladies it's another clueless smug married who thinks our diets consist solely of white bread, chicken nuggets and chips 😂

Let's hope for your own sake you never are a single mum OP as you clearly don't know your arse from your elbow 🤣

I stand corrected about bread choking ducks, it can choke ducklings and other baby birds.

However there are other reasons for not feeding them bread:
www.thespruce.com/is-feeding-ducks-bread-bad-386564

What a nasty post. I’m a single mum. Is there something I should be judged for?

Ps I know not to feed bread to ducks as not an idiot

Yes sorry OP I don’t like a pile on but you can’t back track now.. why did you feel you needed to mention that they might have assumed you’re a single parent? Just why? I think you need to examine your bias.

@FriedasCarLoad

I was one of other people, last week, if you see what I mean.

Married mother of two, happy baby wrapped on my back, happy toddler skipping alongside me, little tupperware pot of oats for the ducks, daughter identifying different breeds/sex of ducks, as well as various berries for foraging. I probably looked smug and judgemental.

The reality is that I'd been battling suicidal thoughts all week, that I felt like the worst mother and wife in the world, and that all my judgement was directed at myself.

I bet I looked really together, but I'd been seriously considering leaving my children motherless and making my husband a widower. Without meaning to sound like a competitive parent, I'm pretty sure I failed harder than you did .

You didn’t fail. You hung on one breath at a time and you even took your children to the duck pond and then you answered a post from a stranger with humility, grace and compassion. You did really, really well. Have you been able to tell any one else how bad you have been feeling? Is your partner supportive?

@ISpyCobraKai

I'm a single Mother on benefits and I have a tub of duck food in my car, get me

I hope you got a chitty for it Cobra.

You wouldn't want to get caught out by the Suburban Sensibilities Squad, & taken to Waitrose car park for interrogation ...

You’re the only judgemental parent here, OP.

If you feel bad about your own parenting skills do something about that, don’t get jealous and judge others.

@FriedasCarLoad

Keep going, you're doing great and you're clearly a lovely mum. And if your username is anything to go by, you sound brilliant

@drumandthebass

Who knew ducks are peas!

Forgive me for being thick, but what does this mean?

It's not really that hard to work out.

She meant "ate" not "are".

Peas are mentioned specifically in the OP.

Yes! Last time I did this sort of thing was as a child with my parents. Had no idea duck feeding has progressed this much. Pretty sure we gave them stale and/or mouldy bread.

@GiveMeAUserName123

I’m not addressing doggie because I haven’t said anything wrong - you are clearly knit picking the post and trying to be offended. I don’t have time for people who can get worked up over absolutely nothing and pick out bits out or context to make themselves upset for no reason. If that’s your thing that’s fine, but it’s not mine.

The post is about being at the duck pond and not knowing you can’t feed bread when everyone else got the memo.

As clearly stated all the other parents there was also alone.

Writes the woman who gets her knickers in a twist about duck pond food etiquette

I don’t have time for people who pretend that not knowing what to feed the ducks might result in them being classed as something they themselves impliedly perceive as negative.

Didn’t realise duck feeding was supposed to be so intricate and precise instead of a relaxing past time

Putting some bird seed in a cardboard box is no more "intricate" or any less "relaxing" than putting bread in a plastic bag.

I bring peas and oats for the ducks as we don’t usually have any bread in. They always turn their nose up at them and head straight for the white sliced loaf brought by other people.

I don’t get why anyone would think you’re a single mum from this scenario? And if you were, no one is judging you for it. Lol

@FriedasCarLoad

You're getting the support you need, right?
Keep on trucking.
You are immensely strong to be keeping it together right now xx

@DevilFinger

What's the for *@mariell - as I said we do feed small amounts of bread to our ducks along with many other things. My issue is with mouldy bread*

My emoji was for the sign not aimed at you.

There was widespread condemnation about not feeding bread to the ducks but these signs suddenly started to appear!

I’m not addressing doggie because I haven’t said anything wrong - you are clearly knit picking the post and trying to be offended. I don’t have time for people who can get worked up over absolutely nothing and pick out bits out or context to make themselves upset for no reason.

Don't be disingenuous. You wrote:
Then us, I’m married, but if you was to judge there and then, a single mum

That implies that people would judge someone for being a single mother, probably you yourself, as you felt it needed to be said. The other parents were alone but you didn't suggest anyone would "judge them" to be single parents.

Feeding ducks too much bread can lead to malnutrition and deformities:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Angel_wing

And what on earth made you think mouldy food that isn't is fit for humans is fit for animals? Mouldy bread can kill ducks. One of the common moulds found on bread, Aspergillus, causes potentially fatal respiratory disease in ducks. Also, what looks like a "little bit" of mould is actually a lot of mould. The invisible to the naked eye hyphae (like roots) extend throughout the bread.

Still, the ducks will have loved you and the bread and will die happy. You were effectively handing out poisonous duck Haribo while the other parents were passing round oven baked kale crisps and rice cakes.

@FriedasCarLoad

The main issue is the bread itself: was it a packet of sliced Sunblest or proper artisan sourdough?

I’m also a single mother but round our way pretty much everyone (single or not) knows that you don’t feed birds bread. And we love the pricey sourdough bread and can actually afford it whenever we like thanks. So no pity or looking down on single mothers needed. Shame on you.

Who made you the duck pond Prefect?

There are signs at many duck ponds that state it’s now ok to feed them bread.