Things you thought were normal/harmless until joining mumsnet

[Antsinyourpanta]

(Lighthearted )
lots of things that I thought were quite normal /fine/harmless before I joined MM seem to be quite abhorrent to a large percentage of posters. I often find myself wondering about whether my perceived normal is actually the minority. Some examples

Home made food or cakes - I bloody love home made cakes and think they are always nicer than shop bought - my first thoughts when offered one is usually yum, a cake! I've never given a moments thought to whether the person owns cats or dogs or has a hygeine certificate.

Ensuite bathrooms - I've got an ensuite bathroom. It's used for any instance where you may need a toilet. Apparently this is very very wrong.

Eating carbs

Bayliss and Harding toiletries - I would not be offended by this as a gift unless it was from my husband

(I'm with you on Thorntons though - they are nasty)

Answering the door to someone - if I see ex criminals selling stuff door to door, I dont answer, otherwise I dont have a problem with answering the door, and i get on with all of my neighbours.

Speaking to and socialising with work colleagues - i speak to, socialise (outside of work) and am friends with most of my work colleagues. I'd count many of them as friends. We buy each other birthday cards and presents and sometimes bring in cakes. (See point 1)

What are the things you've been educated on since joining MN?

Being bare foot in someone else house is rude and disgusting apparently! But wearing your shoes that you have walk around outside in is fine
No you are supposed to bring some socks or slippers with you to change into if you are wearing sandals

@TheLightSideOfTheMoon

I used to send DS to nursery with a cereal bar and a can of Coke Zero as his snack.

I had NO IDEA. The staff used to look at me like this:

In my defence, I was about 20, no other parent friends, no internet access and no help. I genuinely had to wing it.

But then I came on mumsnet and learn stuff.

Awww, you were doing your best and don't let anyone tell you otherwise!!

I also thought back in the days when I was a SAHM and dp was getting up at 5 and doing a 12 hour shift that I was being fairly reasonable in doing the brunt of the housework.
I know better now obvs and should it recur I shall be on my sofa watching the telly demanding he get his work gear off and hoover to give me a break from it all.

@Sgtmajormummy

Dressing in a shalwar kameez that my husband had brought me from India as beautiful uncut embroidered cloth. I had made it up and was proud of my handiwork, wore it to an Indian restaurant and hoped I’d be paying homage to the very nice family that runs the place.

I got called out for cultural appropriation.

Sorry but this made me actually LOL. I'm Indian and don't think this is cultural appropriation (well not offensive anyway) but I do think it's quite funny you did that, neither I nor any of my family have ever worn Indian clothes to an Indian restaurant and the owners certainly would not think or appreciate that you're paying 'homage' to them 🤣. Do you wear a kimono if you go out for sushi?

@Aroundtheworldin80moves

Taking the kids to school. An alien reading MN would get the impression its more dangerous than Kabul. School mums (dads are safe though) parking, lunches, Reading levels, parent evenings, ofsted ratings, applications...

Housework and cleanliness.

Noooooo. School dads want to have sex with you! Especially if the children are friends and (god forbid, I'm getting palpitations thinking about it) they stand next to you and SPEAK! Or of course they're "paedos" (especially if being nice to other kids is involved)

I do often wonder how the more hygiene-obsessed MNers ever manage to have sex at all. Do they go over his bits first with Dettol and a Brillo pad?

Well, from reading past posts, sex is scheduled and showers are taken before the allotted time. (I've always presumed it was a verbal arrangement rather than a sync your calendar arrangement!)

I found out that on no account must I offer a repair man a cup of coffee, and that he is the devil incarnate if he should ask to use the loo!

Using towels more than once. Eating food past the use by date. We're still alive.

@LavenderAskew

I do often wonder how the more hygiene-obsessed MNers ever manage to have sex at all. Do they go over his bits first with Dettol and a Brillo pad?

Well, from reading past posts, sex is scheduled and showers are taken before the allotted time. (I've always presumed it was a verbal arrangement rather than a sync your calendar arrangement!)

That said, there are definitely two polar opposites.

The ones who bleach their children before school are, I'd say the minority compared to the competitive living-in-a-cesspit ones. There was one this week- with people cleaning their toilet when the stains started to smell.

Years ago now, but going for a wee and shutting the bathroom door leaving toddler DC unsupervised in the living room for a whole minute or two.

@SirGawain

I found out that on no account must I offer a repair man a cup of coffee, and that he is the devil incarnate if he should ask to use the loo!

But you also learned that part of a tradesman's job description is to shit in each house he paints. Like dogs marking their territory I suppose. Should Edna decide she doesn't like Gordon's painting and decorating, and rings Keith, Keith just needs to pop into the bog for his shit and (because the bog only gets cleaned every 8 months if there's a full moon on a Friday) to see that someone got there first!

Toilet brushes I mean its totally normal to have a toilet brush so the haters are either elbow deep in toilet pan OR have staff !

Enjoying birthdays
Liking Christmas Eve boxes
Throwing old pants away

I learned that LadyGawain and I are really weird because we have joint finances and usually discuss major expeniture.

I take my shoes off as a guest and walk barefoot in someone else's house. Feet are clean though! I thought I was being polite taking off my shoes!

I have a toilet brush in every toilet.
I share towels with my DH.
I ask all visitors to take their shoes off in my house.

Not educated bu this at all. But I am horrified that MN in general thinks no man in the whole world can ever ever change and modify their previous behaviour.

People make terrible mistakes, learn from them and grow into better people mostly. But never on MN. No man ever gets a second chance.

@iamtheoneandonlyyy

Oh yes. Birthdays. I knew there were people (my DH for a start) who are not that fussed about their birthday and wouldn't neccessarily want a party or big fuss. But I didnt realise how many people felt aggrieved that other people liked celebrating their own birthday! Theres always an assumption that its a bit immature or childish to enjoy your birthday

@Luckyelephant1
I now realize what a fool I must have seemed!
It was more like the sewing nerd in me thinking: “I’ve made this thing, now where can I wear it???”
And yes, I’d be perfectly capable of wearing a kimono to a Japanese restaurant…

I thought earning over 50k a year was very rare and not many people do. How wrong I was. Ditto with 6 figure income households. I thought these made up a very small percentage of people in the country. MN has so many.

Same with savings - I always thought only older people had savings and had paid off their mortgage. Apparently MN is full of the financially savvy!

If you give your kids raisins you might as well be giving them bag of sugar cubes to chew on.

Sometimes Deliberately dressing in clothes I know my DP likes me in...I just think it's nice to wear what I know he fancies me most in because I love him and I equally fancy him more in certain things he owns. I didn't realise that was making me a blunt weapon of the patriarchy.

@SirGawain

I learned that LadyGawain and I are really weird because we have joint finances and usually discuss major expeniture.

Same. I thought I was in the majority being married and having all wages paid into joint account and making expenditure decisions together!

Oh and I’m mistaken for thinking my OH is a genuine, kind man who sees me as an equal and does 50 % of the chores and enjoys cooking … he clearly up to something and has an ulterior motive.

@Geamhradh

Old people smiling at babies Opening my front door if the doorbell goes My child's paternal grandmother Teachers doing their job Leaving my washing on my balcony at night Homework London Going on holiday and actually treating yourself rather than paying thrupence ha'penny for a leaky tent Buying Christmas presents Talking about TV programmes AFTER they've been aired

Now I'm wiser and know I'll be screaming, shaking, ringing the police and acting like Mr Dursley nailing up the house should even one of those things happen across my path.

thanks this has actually made me laugh out loud! so funny. The holiday one- yes god forbid you actually spend some money on a nice holiday!

I am odd in tending to assume that or when someone knocks on the door, that they are not an axe murderer and answer it!