Chasing up ambulance

[Mariell]

My mother fell and my father couldn’t get her up. He called ambulance 9.30pm.

Called ambulance again at midnight. Ambulance came 5.30am!

This was a couple of days ago and My mother is in hospital.

I live over 300 miles away.

My dad has recently given the emergency cord alarm people my phone number.

He has fallen and cannot get up so cant get to his landline or mobile phone and is stuck on the floor. He pulled an emergency cord and was able to speak.

They have called an ambulance.

Given the time taken recently to get an ambulance to my mother do I call and chase it up?

My parents were doing great but in a very short space of time have their health has rapidly declined so all this is emergency stuff is new to us.

Usually the care line company would have responders that they send out if no family or friends locally. This is more expensive than just the basic line though. As a matter of urgency I would have a key safe put in their property.

Although it is not nice I guess that at the moment it is not considered life threatening so will be down the list for urgency. Do you not know anyone even an hour or so away that could help you.

@bestbefore

Do you know the reasons for your mums fall? I'm just wondering if they have both got the same sort of symptoms it seems a bit odd...hope you can get them some help soon.

I know exactly why. Double jabbed. No health problems until this. His sister has been exactly the same. Perfectly well and then jabbed and then sudden collapse and loss of feeling in hands. That’s a completely different topic that I don’t want to get into. I just want to get my dad up off the floor and seen to.

Police have said the ambulance service is going to be delayed.

They suggested I call his GP. GP surgery no answer and my dad has previously said it took him weeks to get through on phone so I don’t hold out much hope.

Message says to call 111 Which I have done but that is NHS Wales where I love and they have said I cannot connect via 111 to NHS England where my parents live!

He then said that a GP wouldn’t go round anyway as they are not trained to lift people up off the floor and wouldn’t do so!

UPDATE as I write. A cousins husband who lives in the same county is going to be able to pick up a key from my dads sister as apparently she MAY have a spare key and then he is going to attempt to try and help my dad. This in itself is good news but still time consuming as it’s a lot of driving down him to do this and he himself has to attend a much needed GP appointment this morning before setting off.

Thank you everyone for just being there and saying kind words.

Not been in this position before and only yesterday was speaking to my dad about putting measures in place.

I suggested my ordering him a zimmer frame but he wasn’t that keen!

I now think having a portable urinal bottle at the side of his bed will be a good idea so that he doesn’t get up at night!

But at this stage I don’t know if he will be admitted to hospital or not.

@notapizzaeater

I was going to suggest a local Facebook group but that's fraught with dangers tbh. Surely the cord company / retirement owners have a protocol ? Isn't that what you are paying for ? You say you can't go because of your back - have you a friend that can go on your behalf ?

Even a local locksmith who could get the door open and then reassure your dad? But they're not going to want to be obliged to wait with him until the ambulance arrives which could be hours. Your poor dad, I can't help thinking of him stuck there alone.

It's no my going to help now but there's care agencies that would go round in these circumstances, they can also do welfare checks and report back to you. Do interview the agencies carefully as they differ in service levels

Ah just seen the update about your cousin's husband....

You are not thinking practically, because you are too emotional. But you are going to have to be, soon, practical that is.
Can you pay a private company to be an emergency assistance, councils offer such service aswell.

You are going to Have to put more things in place, or tell your dad that this can't continue, and he may need to move into a nursing home? this unfortunate situation just cannot continue, and what if it gets rapidly worse?

Is it a proper care alarm that your parents have or just one to a warden in the building?

My parents' local authority have a falls team that can attend in these cases. Obviously if they realise that there's a medical need to have an ambulance when they get there they will call one.

I hope you manage to get your dad sorted today and that he's ok. It might be worth fitting a keysafe so that there's access to the property if needed and the urinal bottle is a good idea. My dad has one as he sometimes needs the bathroom every hour in the night.

@Oblomov21

You are not thinking practically, because you are too emotional. But you are going to have to be, soon, practical that is. Can you pay a private company to be an emergency assistance, councils offer such service aswell.

You are going to Have to put more things in place, or tell your dad that this can't continue, and he may need to move into a nursing home? this unfortunate situation just cannot continue, and what if it gets rapidly worse?

Absolutely! I spoke to my dad yesterday about all of this and said that things could worsen and we need to have more measures in place and I started suggesting things and we were going to speak after he had spoken to his GP about him having a carer twice a day to help him dress.

He was agreeable to that and we even joked about him having a dolly bird type nurse like In Are you being Served tv show whilst my mum is in hospital!

I did suggest him having his mobile on him al the time but I suppose he just got up and went to the bathroom for a wee and didn’t even think about it.

I can’t force him to do anything but after this I think he will be taking things more seriously. That’s providing it was a case of him just not being able to get up and is t anything more serious such as a broken bone etc.

I feel a bit better now that my cousins husband should be able to get to him later on this morning even if it’s to shout through a letter box if he can’t get in!

My dad is a very calm man so hopefully that will stand him in good stead whilst he waits for help.

You could call the Adult Social Care team in the local authority your parents live in. They can arrange for your parents & their living home to be assessed, and the necessary adaptations put in. They'll also assess whether they need a carer going in, and how frequently they require one, and look at their finances to see if they can get it fully or partially funded, or if they need to pay for carers out of their own pocket.

They will be able to give you guidance as to how best to deal with today's situation too.

I hope someone gets to him soon so he's not in discomfort any longer.

Please make the phone call today to get tye ball rolling, even if someone comes and helps your dad up.

Even if no-one can get him up off the floor until the ambulance comes it would be helpful if someone can get him a blanket, pillow and a drink of water or a cup of tea. It's actually hypothermia and dehydration that make old people who have a 'long lie' ill often rather than the fall itself.

I would have thought that the warden of the retirement flats is the person best placed to do this as they will have access.

Even though almost no-one has an on site warden any longer unless you pay for extra sheltered the company will usually employ a visiting warden who can come out in theses circumstances or at least know who can help locally.
Your dad needs to press the call buzzer again as it may be different people who answer it in hours vs out of hours
Can you find out who the company is who owns the flats and call them?

Really feel for you op. The NHS in general is in such a mess at the minute. It's very scary

Also sometimes people can get themselves up after all if they are talked through the right technique which is to crawl to something stable to push up on eg sofa or bath, get into kneeling position and try to use the object to push up from there.
Might possibly be worth a try if he is not in pain

@Horseradishsauce

You could call the Adult Social Care team in the local authority your parents live in. They can arrange for your parents & their living home to be assessed, and the necessary adaptations put in. They'll also assess whether they need a carer going in, and how frequently they require one, and look at their finances to see if they can get it fully or partially funded, or if they need to pay for carers out of their own pocket.

They will be able to give you guidance as to how best to deal with today's situation too.

I hope someone gets to him soon so he's not in discomfort any longer.

Please make the phone call today to get tye ball rolling, even if someone comes and helps your dad up.

Thank you. They will be able to pay for everything. Thankfully there are no financial worries or issues the only problems are any resistance from them wanting any help.

My mother has always been adamant that she would not want any carers but she’s in hospital now anyway so she is not of my immediate concern as such as I know she is being looked after.

If and when she comes out we can the assess her needs.

As for my father all I can do is keep talking about ways in which to make things easier for him.

He has just started having a food service delivered to him. I am not sure if my mum was eating those meals as well or still making her own food as she was against having ready meals delivered at one time.

It’s hard to ascertain some things about their lifestyle from regular phone calls as the chat is usually about pleasant things and not in depth personal questions until the last couple of days.

Gosh I’m sorry - I had no idea that this could even happen (I.e. 14 hour wait for an ambulance). I hope your dad is ok and you can get your parents the support they need.

@Mariell are they in Mid or West Wales ? Poor and remote and social services are at breaking point. So sorry.
Sending you a virtual coffee and biscuits.

@PegasusReturns

Gosh I’m sorry - I had no idea that this could even happen (I.e. 14 hour wait for an ambulance). I hope your dad is ok and you can get your parents the support they need.

Thank you. I’ve previously read about the occasional horrific delay in the media but it’s now commonplace. Apparently the ambulance service is stricken because many are testing positive it have been in contact etc so it’s caused havoc.

Not sure what can be done about it but it’s a very distressing situation.

I had a fall on black ice earlier this year and was on my drive for over an hour as phone was in my bag which I had already put in my car and I was walking to my boot. My husband was away and children have long left home.

I later had another fall indoors when my back gave way and was on my own for six hours on the floor with the dog deciding it best to keep me warm and him laying on top of me trapping me and refusing to budge until he got hungry and I was able to crawl to a door frame and haul myself up!

My husband is often away and I now take precautions at home to always have my phone on me.

It’s bloody awful being on the floor as the time passes by very slowly!

[quote Travelledtheworld]@Mariell are they in Mid or West Wales ? Poor and remote and social services are at breaking point. So sorry.
Sending you a virtual coffee and biscuits.
[/quote]
I’m in Wales. They are the other side of the country in Essex.

@Horseradishsauce

You could call the Adult Social Care team in the local authority your parents live in. They can arrange for your parents & their living home to be assessed, and the necessary adaptations put in. They'll also assess whether they need a carer going in, and how frequently they require one, and look at their finances to see if they can get it fully or partially funded, or if they need to pay for carers out of their own pocket.

They will be able to give you guidance as to how best to deal with today's situation too.

I hope someone gets to him soon so he's not in discomfort any longer.

Please make the phone call today to get tye ball rolling, even if someone comes and helps your dad up.

This is good advice. Adult social services are usually really good. Have you managed to get through to the gp?

Go are not allowed to come out to my dad as they are under the same rules as the police apparently and not allowed to help him out if he’s fallen!

He must wait on the floor for an ambulance or hopefully my cousins husband is able to get to him sooner!

If he had fallen in the street the public would help him to his feet. Falling indoors means he has to stay on the floor until the only people that are authorised to help him up - the ambulance crew - arrive!

It all seems rather surreal but sadly we live in time’s where people sue so it’s no wonder that the police and GP don’t want to help him up before an ambulance arrives as it’s possible they could aggravate an injury.

He may well not have an injury and just need helping up but of course we just do not know.

Just to mention that as you say your parents would be self funding for care, you don't need to involve Adult Social Services (you can if you like, but there will be a wait so it could delay things). You can access care direct through an at-home care agency, and they will visit to assess your parents needs. There are lots of different agencies if google 'at-home care' and the location (I used Home Instead). I did contact SS too, but I had already had care in place for a fortnight by the time they called me back.

That assumes your parents will accept help of course, but I suspect they will after the events of the past few days.

I hope you get good news about your dad soon.

But would the Gp be able to tell you if he has gone to hospital yet or not?

What a huge worry. I hope he's okay.

@tintodeverano2

But would the Gp be able to tell you if he has gone to hospital yet or not?

Data protection! Not allowed to tell me! Now I’m awake on the ball I’ve asked everything and that was one of the things I queried.

@Shellingbynight

Just to mention that as you say your parents would be self funding for care, you don't need to involve Adult Social Services (you can if you like, but there will be a wait so it could delay things). You can access care direct through an at-home care agency, and they will visit to assess your parents needs. There are lots of different agencies if google 'at-home care' and the location (I used Home Instead). I did contact SS too, but I had already had care in place for a fortnight by the time they called me back.

That assumes your parents will accept help of course, but I suspect they will after the events of the past few days.

I hope you get good news about your dad soon.

I can only suggest to my dad it’s very difficult if they don’t want like help.

He has agreed to cater coming twice a day to help him dress and undress as he is struggling with buttons and fastenings. He had told me that it took him six hours to do to his shirt and trouser flies.

It’s madness but he has never worn a t shirt or sweat shirt in his life and always wears a proper button up shirt!

I don’t think he would even entertain elasticated trousers!

I’m the opposite I don’t care about having ‘old age’ things to assist me but my parents are very resistant!