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Original poster

Be honest…do you have a favourite DC?

115 replies

Eastie77Returns · 19/08/2021 10:41

I’d gladly take a bullet for any of my DC. Wouldn’t give it a second thought. I know I love them equally. I love spending time with all of them, they make me laugh (or cry!) in equal measure. But if I’m 100% honest there is one I feel I have a better connection with. I don’t know if that makes them a favourite? Does anyone else feel the same about one of their children?

OP posts:
Ninkanink · 19/08/2021 10:44

No I don’t. But I only have two. I suppose the more you have the more chance there’ll be one that you feel a special connection with.

ThePlantsitter · 19/08/2021 10:45

No, I absolutely don't. But I do have a better connection with each of them at different times. They sort of take it in turns.

MulanIsChinese · 19/08/2021 10:46

Nope, I don't like either of them! Grin

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RainyDay2020 · 19/08/2021 10:47

My children are very very different and there are different things I love (and sometimes loathe!) about their personalities.
But neither one of them is my ‘favourite’.
My neices and nephews on the tether hand I do have a definite favourite! Grin

BellaElla99 · 19/08/2021 10:48

Yeah I do. I had PND with one and really struggled to bond. I’ve beaten myself up about it so much because I love them both so much but one is just easier. I’ve spoken to numerous people in real life about it because it was upsetting me and apparently, it is quite common.

QueenAdreena · 19/08/2021 10:48

I don’t have favourites, but there are days when some are easier than others and I feel more positively connected with them. Depends on their behaviour, and what’s going on in our lives really and can change daily (or even hourly!). Love them all equally and endlessly though.

Squit · 19/08/2021 10:49

I’ve thought about this a lot.

One of my children is very easy to get along with. Laid back and sociable. Easy going and undemanding.

My other child is the very opposite of all those qualities.

But I don’t think I prefer the easy going child. It’s just easier. My less agreeable child has a million charming traits. I’ve just got to work harder for them.

Byheckythump · 19/08/2021 10:49

Yes. The cat.

BellaElla99 · 19/08/2021 10:50

Maybe that is what it is then. I don’t have a favourite but I find one easier than the other because they are such different children.

TokyoSushi · 19/08/2021 10:50

No. I definitely have an easier child, but I absolutely love them both the same.

Mayhemmumma · 19/08/2021 10:50

Yes after birth of youngest, postnatal depression and sleep deprivation but as now older, primary aged not at all, I adore them equally I find different things easier with each of course but my heart is definitely split evenly. And it's such a relief because I was scared it wouldn't happen.

RightOnTheEdge · 19/08/2021 10:52

Honestly no. I have two and I don't have a favourite.
I might have a favourite at one particular moment or day if one is being lovely and helpful or particularly cute and the other is bring a grumpy, difficult pain in the bum but overall no.

IveGotASongThatllGetOnYNerves · 19/08/2021 10:53

Nah. They're both arses equally.

Brollypackedforscottishholiday · 19/08/2021 10:53

Easier or harder relationships but not better or worse or favourites...
I have many dc. Different times in their lives are easier, some more testing - currently have 3 teens and a coming up 13yo. life is a challenge!
Today the 17 yo IS my favourite as he isn't home!!
Grin

TootTootTootToot · 19/08/2021 10:54

I have two boys and two girls and I’m really glad I definitely don’t have a favourite or, for that matter, a least favourite. My kids are all in their 20’s and are all different. I spend a lot more time with my girls than my boys but that isn’t because I like them more. I have one perfect child who is always happy and who goes through life effortlessly and one who struggles with things, but I love them the same.

My kids all love me too. I suppose if I had a child who hated me I might find it more difficult to love them the same way.

OverByYer · 19/08/2021 10:54

Not a favourite but one is an easier person than the other. But the less easy one is such a force of nature which balances it out ( I wish I had that much personality)

JaninaDuszejko · 19/08/2021 10:55

As I tell my children, I do have a favourite, but it keeps changing. They sometimes compete to be the least favourite which presumably mean I've gone wrong somewhere Grin.

Anordinarymum · 19/08/2021 10:56

After a lifetime of being a parent, I most definitely prefer the dog.

No favourites, no matter what dreadful things they have (all) done, My mother had favourites and it was so awful being a child, she should have been prosecuted for some of the stuff she did.

But back to the dog.......... well.. she does not answer back for one thing..

ancientgran · 19/08/2021 10:56

I've got 4. They all have a turn at being the one that's driving me mad/worrying me to death/is the light of my life. Pretty much the same with the 6 GC. They all think they know who is the favourite and I guess the fact they all think it is a different one means it is shared out pretty equally.

JaninaDuszejko · 19/08/2021 10:56

@Byheckythump

Yes. The cat.
Are you my Mum?
AZFell · 19/08/2021 10:57

If you've ever seen Malcolm in the Middle, Lois (the mum) is accused by Malcolm of favouring Reese more, and she says she doesn't, but Reese needs more help - he needs her to fight for him and help him, whereas Malcolm will be fine whatever happens.

I kind of feel like this with my dc.

Elder dc was a difficult baby, even worse toddler... it wasn't until about age 7 or 8 that things seemed to let up... but now we're entering high school age and hormones are kicking in. Everything is always such a battle with dc1 and for dc1. Whether it's school work or friendships or emotional support, it all takes up so much energy.

Dc2 however is far more easy going. Finds it all much easier, is more compliant, less drama, achieves the same as dc1 with less effort from all involved.

I love them both fiercely and equally, but I know who stresses me out more and I know who I am likely to need to help out more (which I do because I care and want them both to succeed and be happy).

NautaOcts · 19/08/2021 10:59

Not a favourite but have one (out of three) that’s easier, and I am grateful for her as would find having 3 ‘highly strung’ very challenging. Plus she makes me see that it’s not me/my parenting

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 19/08/2021 11:01

My two are very different ages so they both have aspects that are easier. DD1 is independent and fairly easy going but she’s 7. DD2 is harder work at the moment but she’s nearly 11 months. DD2, whilst messier, eats most things and enjoys meal times. DD1 is the fussiest eater and it makes meal times a complete drag. DD1 is harder to get to go to sleep but sleeps through the night. DD2 falls asleep more easily most nights but doesn’t stay asleep.

I love them both completely.

GoWalkabout · 19/08/2021 11:02

Same in strength of feeling. One is more like me so I understand her intuitively. The other I have had to learn her ins and outs and this has been fascinating.

SirVixofVixHall · 19/08/2021 11:02

No I don’t, but both of them have elements that I have found tricky and elements that I have rapport with. Like pps sometimes one child has been less or more challenging.
They have quite a lot in common, and I only have two. I feel equally close to each of them.
A friend has three dc and has always been closest to the eldest who is very like her, and found the youngest easy and the middle one more of a challenge, she loves them all fiercely though.