Things you want to get off your chest but can't

[Neonorchid]

Spill it here...

I'll start! I love you to bits but my word you are spoiled. Every sentence does not have to start with I want.

I forgive you. But you will never know that.

I care deeply about you. I know "love" is a complicated word given the circumstances, but I really do care deeply about you, with a kind of love, and just want you to be happy. I'm so sorry for all the difficulties you've been through. I just want you to have a peaceful and content life. My heart breaks.

I'm sorry.

You were a great friend to me, and I hurt you. I'm sorry I stopped answering your texts, I'm sorry I stopped picking up the phone. I hope you have a good life, I truly do. You deserve the world.

@TheLittleRedToothbrush

You abused me in ways that are totally unforgivable, You ruined my health and ultimately my life ... you have been sent to prison for what you did to me ... But sometimes I still miss you 😢

I understand.

I told the police and social services about you. In March.

Stop using my state educated children as a benchmark to prove how well the privately educated children in the family are doing, to justify it was "money well spent"

I still think about you every day. I wish things could come right.

1. I don't yet know how I feel about you but I love it when you chase me and pay me attention

2. FFS. Your kids are fucking spoilt, you are not instilling the values you claim to be. Give your FIL the respect he deserves and be grateful for everything he's done for you and your kids, you stuck up, ungrateful, pretentious cow

3. I hate your parents and wish they'd fuck off into oblivion for what they've put us through

I am not ok.

I can't take the level of fucking angst you all keep throwing at me. I can't listen to one more issue or complaint because I think I'll either scream or throw up.

Would you please stop using me as your soundboard, I am so completely lost in all the problems that you keep piling onto me that I don't even know who I am anymore.

I am not ok

I love you but I cannot cope with the avalanche of messages every day detailing the minutiae of your life. Your kids are lazy and spoilt. You complain about being broke then spend money like its going out of fashion. You're exhausting me.

@sugarhockeyicedtea I feel exactly the same atm. It's suffocating.

I am not ok

I'm sorry to hear this. Can you reach out to anyone in real life to say this? Things can get better for you. It's the hardest thing in the world to do but please tell someone how you feel - your GP even.

Mum.

Please stop drinking. Ending up comatose at a family reunion was dreadful to watch. It’s made me go teetotal.

And sort your bloody hearing aid out. You are 70 but look and act about 85.

Sometimes I want to be surrounded by people and sometimes I don’t. Just because we chat sometimes doesn’t mean I want to everyday and that also doesn’t mean I don’t like you - just that time is precious and I have so many things to do all of the time. I value friendship but I also need space.

I feel completely abandoned by the very service and professionals who are supposed to help me. If I could speak honestly and bluntly to them I would tell them they are completely crap and I hate that I am prevented from accessing an alternative service who would actually give a damn and help me!

I am on the verge of being in a horrific situation as a result and I am utterly terrified.

I have been working so damn hard this year to improve as much as I can myself but I cannot do it alone. I need help and I need support from professionals who actually give a shit, get off their butts and do their fucking job instead of passing me from pillar to post, refusing to take responsibility for just how badly they have let me down.

I'm also aware that in my locale I am FAR from the only person this applies to. Their inaction - and worse - poor actions have had fatal results in some cases. It is a disgrace and a scandal and I am furious!

I am running out of places to turn and becoming desperate.

I have complained formally and informally on numerous occasions and never even been given anything close to an apology, instead I've been stonewalled, gaslit, insulted and patronised. I've experienced/become aware of unlawful behaviours and a total "closed ranks" response.

There appears to be no accountability and no authority willing to properly hold them to account.

There is one particular person who has really caused a lot of the problems through lies and misrepresentation. It's such a small organisation that they all know each other very well, have worked together for decades in some cases and they won't even CONSIDER they may have faults/issues with how they are working and how they interact with those they are supposed to help.

At this point I am having to seriously consider paid options which I don't really have the money for but if I don't there is a very real possibility I will end up in an extremely vulnerable even dangerous position.

I'm done! I'm done putting up with non existent support, with excuses and with nobody accepting responsibility for their jobs.

I know you're my stalker. The things you have said to and about me are absolutely disgusting. But I also know that they reflect far more on you, and the unhappy, loveless, miserable existence you have, than they do on me. Mike loved me wholly and completely. He kept on your good side because it was easier, but he also thought you were a bit of a dick, and he pitied you, because it's clear that you will never be happy. Oh, and just for the record, you've never managed to actually upset me. And one day you'll slip up and I'll have proof and I will share it with everyone. Including your girlfriend, who will finally realise what a vile, hateful misogynist you are.

You're suffocating me.

And YOU, well you're just doing my head in. Fuck off.

You are so cool and you confuse me.

@TheLittleRedToothbrush

You abused me in ways that are totally unforgivable, You ruined my health and ultimately my life ... you have been sent to prison for what you did to me ... But sometimes I still miss you 😢

Sending you love ❤️

I hate you. You made me let you in, and then you trampled all over me your just like your mother.

@FlowerPower3110

I'm sorry.

You were a great friend to me, and I hurt you. I'm sorry I stopped answering your texts, I'm sorry I stopped picking up the phone. I hope you have a good life, I truly do. You deserve the world.

I'm assuming you've had a very solid reason for ending this friendship, but what prevents you from telling them just this? Ghosting isn't always needed, just s thought?!

I love you but I don't think my future happiness is with you. I wish I had more time when I was younger to figure out what I wanted as this isn't it. I feel like we won't be together for much longer.

I know you have ASD but please for the love of god talk to me about something other than North Korea, Communism or Minecraft… we’ve got 3.5 weeks of holiday left and I don’t think I can take being ‘talked at’ for hours on end any more!

I DON'T WANT TO GO ON HOLIDAY WITH MY MIL!!! 😩