Tell me your best examples of cheeky F**kery and unbelievable requests on FB Marketplace!!

[Buttybach]

I have been recently trying to sell some items on FB marketplace. I know there are CF aplenty on there but recently this has astounded me!

I tried to sell some Our Generation dolls play sets.
One of the sets was a camping set where you could clearly see my skirting boards behind the tent and all the accessories were clearly made out of plastic. I had three messages all asking how many people could sleep in the tent!! (4 if you are a borrower)
I also had a 4 poster bed advertised which clearly stated doll bed in capitals. That attracted many messages regarding the quality of the mattress. Not sure why they thought they were getting a 4 poster bed with mattress and bedding for £30!

I also had a toy ice cream truck and a retro diner for sale. Both of which had all the original food accessory parts. I had several messages asking if they could buy certain items from the sets so that they had a complete set! (Erm nope)

The biggest debacle was trying to sell a kids Ikea wardrobe set and loft bed.
I had a lady who wanted the whole lot. She had a van and was coming to get it on the Wednesday. Wednesday morning she told be she was waiting for a refund from another bed she had ordered.
By this point I had dismantled the loft bed and the wardrobes and they were all in my hallway. She asked if we could keep them until Friday. We reluctantly agreed. I explained we had others interested. It came to Friday and I messaged her and she said she would be collecting today.
I asked her what time and then realised she had blocked me!!
I then had a second buyer who had access to a van but wasn't moving into their house until the Monday. We agreed to keep the items as it suited us to do it on the weekdays.
It got to the Monday and she said she was now waiting to hear from social services to find out if her furniture grant had been successful.
Who asks someone to keep a huge quantity of furniture in their hallway without even having money to purchase it.
A lovely buyer came the very next day.

What time wasters/numpties have you experienced?

I was giving away my very heavy big cross trainer, a lady turned up 3 hours early by herself in a tiny little car 🙄

@IncessantNameChanger

Most of mine are the same two people wanting things that cant drive and live nowhere near me. I put the village as the first thing on my post then a few blank lines so it cant be lost in the listing.

Both of them comment as soon as I post so no one else replies. Then they either ask me to meet in town or that they arrange a mate to collect.

Even on local clothes bank pages where I give kids clothes away they do this. I have totally given up now with everything except Ebay to sell things. Charity shop is such low hassle compared to this

Block them so they don't see your posts?

@IncessantNameChanger

Most of mine are the same two people wanting things that cant drive and live nowhere near me. I put the village as the first thing on my post then a few blank lines so it cant be lost in the listing.

Both of them comment as soon as I post so no one else replies. Then they either ask me to meet in town or that they arrange a mate to collect.

Even on local clothes bank pages where I give kids clothes away they do this. I have totally given up now with everything except Ebay to sell things. Charity shop is such low hassle compared to this

That's an easy fix on FB.

Just block them. They won't see your post so can't comment

Sold a baby car seat and isofix base. Woman asked if I'd accept a lower price as she was short of money. I really needed the money myself quickly so said yes. When she collected it, she was driving a new Mercedes. Was shocked so didn't say anything at the time but still bugs me a year later - I needed the extra money much more than she did but serves me right for falling for it

People don't bloody read!

Yes, and that's the trouble with ebay - people bid knowing perfectly well they can return items claiming they're "not as described" or even damage them on purpose

Bad as it is, at least Facebook means "sold as seen"

Last year I had a bundle of Scotch R'Belle girls clothes. I had about 10 pieces. Worth about £600 new. I wanted £50 for the bundle on marketplace. I explained they were designer and I had a really long ranty message for all to see on the post stating that I shouldn't be charging so much because not everyone could afford to pay that much and her daughter wanted them but she didn't have the money to pay for something that expensive and that it wasn't fair!

I may try that in Chanel!

I sold one of these Pedigree Sindy Chest of Drawers on eBay. The buyer was upset that it was dolls furniture. It was listed as dolls furniture under the Sindy doll section of eBay.

I've had similar experiences to everyone.

Although best one was when I put up a load of helium balloons for free after DCs bday - so maybe time wasting messages including one asking if they'd still be inflated by Tuesday .... wtf!

Ugh.
I was moving house. 3 weeks prior, my amazing sister died.
My mental health was not at a premium.
I was downsizing, and somewhat unprepared, due to the situation.
I listed shitloads of very good stuff as free for collection.
Had the usual bullshitters that asked for delivery.
One was very special though.

This person knew my parents, and that my sister had died.
So that person started to DM me asking for delivery on almost everything.
Initially I agreed on a few items, as I knew them a bit, but it was bloody inconvenient- and they weren't even bothered to be there when I delivered.
The demands became ridiculous after that.
Request for a corner sofa delivered (impossible). Then offered to send a taxi to collect it (WTF)? 'But please hold it for me. I need it!'
I was moving in a couple of days. Impossible.
I stopped corresponding.
The person THEN TEXTED MY MUM, who was nothing to do with the items. They asked her for first refusal on all of my sister's clothes and shoes, because 'their girlfriend loves clothes and shoes'.
That was a week after the funeral.
Some people have no idea.

I put a table & 6 chairs on the free site, had 2 replies within seconds, the first had no way of collecting, the second had a van and could collect so I went with her.
A weeks worth of abuse followed, saying I should give to the first person to respond. He was planning to get a couple of mates to walk 5 miles with a dining table & 6 chairs, posted a load of vitriol on the page until it was reported and removed
Such a sense of entitlement & I'll never give stuff away on there again!

I was selling a large mirror and had a woman ask if I would take an offer on it. I said no as others were interested and it was £30 take it or leave it. She then pulled the sob story that she was on benefits and couldn’t afford much so would I take less. Still no. Surely if you don’t have enough money you don’t need a big, fancy mirror?

Offered dd's uniform for free. Listed with photos and sizes. Had loads of messages asking whether they would fit a 14/15/16 year old even though trousers were clearly labelled aged 12/13 and blazer was xs. Then had loads of people asking for delivery even though I clearly stated won't deliver and people were asking who were just streets away so no reason they couldn't have walked to collect if they wanted them. It felt such a hassle trying to give stuff away that I asked for a tenner for the sports kit just to avoid it.

I sold a solid pine kingsize bed frame for £25. It was a bit dated style wise but in almost new condition. We'd moved and I didn't have anywhere to put it.

I had around 50 messages about it no exaggeration. I sold it to the first person who didn't mess about, was polite, agreed to collect as per the advert and didn't haggle on the price.

I had abusive messages from probably 15 people after I marked at as sold because I'd sold 'their' bed and I had one woman send me six at first begging and then ranting messages about how she'd needed it (for free!) for her children and how because of me they'd be sleeping on the floor that night. She then offered to go and get it from the woman I'd sold it to! Erm, no.

I'm currently trying to sell a load of V-Tech baby stuff. Think things that are £40-50 new I'm listing for £10. Used, obviously but all fine and working. I've lost count of the 'can I have it for £2' messages I've had. No!!

I gave away a kirby vacuum cleaner to someone who 'desperately' needed it. I even dug out all the accessories and the carpet cleaner because they were so desperate. One day later it reappears on Facebook for £100. I wouldn't have minded so much but it was that they obviously didn't even care enough to try and hide it from me. Charming.

This is the reason I have given up selling things and it all goes to the charity shop. I tried selling some things before Christmas last year. I advertised a CHILDS tub chair. Had several messages from a man asking me to measure if from certain angles, which I did. He then complained it was too small for him to fit in and wouldn't be suitable . I had several other time wasters who would inbox me to ask if items were still available, I would reply to it then hear nothing more front them. All items were advertised at a very reasonable cost as I wanted rid, but the amount of cheeky offers I got saying they "only wanted to pay x amount" or can I deliver 30 miles away was astonishing. Cheeky fuckery at it's finest!!

I think the best (worst?) one I saw was a huge sob story from a lady who found out she was pg but had no money so needed loads of baby clothes - suitable for a girl, good quality only - for free
Also, did anyone have a pair of XYZ trainers in a size 5 - she was happy to pay up to £150 for them

@Hoppinggreen quite a lot of these in my area… asking for free stuff for their kids whilst walking around with lip fillers and £400 hair extensions. i really have to bite my tongue when i see those kinds of posts!

Loads of time wasters but a couple of real odd ones that stand out.

First, we had an cast iron gate a deceased relation had bought but never used. Posted it at a low price, had a few trying to get it for nothing. Then a woman wanted it and arranged for her builder to collect, he didn’t show, this went on for a couple of days then she says her builder had just walked out on the job 🤔. So DH suggested she drive over, not far, view it and then we’d follow her back and drop it off. Quite reasonable, a 25 minute round trip for everyone…never replied. Eventually sold to a decent person.

Second, offered two booster cushions for free. Two replies at same time, one wanted one and the other wanted both and came within the hour and collected. The other person when told lost the plot, insisted their message was first, I hadn’t been first etc. Posted on the selling page and DM me. I reported her to admin who agreed she was unreasonable. Later discovered she worked as a counsellor 😳

I sold DD's mid sleeper bed with slide. A lady paid full price but then came in her Corsa to collect it. She and I managed to get it mostly into the car and tie her boot down around it and she drove off very happily.

This may out me to a couple of my friends.

I once listed a double pine bed. Can't remember what I asked - say £50. Had a few messages of interest - standard "is this available?" then I had an actual polite message off a man who told me all about his bad back and how he needed a new bed etc etc. He sounded like a time waster. He said he lived about 50miles away. He asked me did I really want only £50for it?! I told him yes, just £50 was fine. I advised him he'd need a large car or a van. Not a problem, his mum had a van and she'd collect it apparently. Various, over involved messages back and fo. But Arranged collection the following day for 2pm.

Went out for a meal that evening with friends. Showed them the messages. They agreed that the mum would never materialise.

Imagine my surprise the following day when a lovely lady driver of a van rang my doorbell to collect my bed for her son, with £50.

Had to text my friends a "you never guess what's just happened!"

Not cheeky but funny.
On our local Facebook group there was a post from a woman saying that her hairdresser had let her down at the last minute and she desperately needed someone that day who could do French plaits, someone replied saying "I could do 5?" and the poster replied saying "Thanks but I only want 2".

I appreciate my story didn't fit the OP but thought I'd share nonetheless

This was the tent I had for sale clearly marked as a Dolls Tent.
"Can I sleep in it"
" how many people does it hold"
"Is it waterproof as our family tent ripped last year"

Seriously people! You can see my parquet floor and skirting boards!!

@FrogsLoveRain

This may out me to a couple of my friends.

I once listed a double pine bed. Can't remember what I asked - say £50. Had a few messages of interest - standard "is this available?" then I had an actual polite message off a man who told me all about his bad back and how he needed a new bed etc etc. He sounded like a time waster. He said he lived about 50miles away. He asked me did I really want only £50for it?! I told him yes, just £50 was fine. I advised him he'd need a large car or a van. Not a problem, his mum had a van and she'd collect it apparently. Various, over involved messages back and fo. But Arranged collection the following day for 2pm.

Went out for a meal that evening with friends. Showed them the messages. They agreed that the mum would never materialise.

Imagine my surprise the following day when a lovely lady driver of a van rang my doorbell to collect my bed for her son, with £50.

Had to text my friends a "you never guess what's just happened!"

It's nice to have hope of some kind people out there! Recently we had my daughters bedroom Wardrobes from FB marketplace. A lady had moved into a new house and the past owners had left two pax wardrobes with all the fittings inside. She explained on the post that she was disabled so they were free but you had to dismantle. Someone must have responded to her within seconds because I sent a message 3 mins after she posted it and she allready had a taker. The next morning she discovered that the other person had blocked her. She wasn't in the house yet so she had planned to go up to the house while the person demolished. She messaged me and we said we would be there within the hour. We took a massive bunch of flowers and a candle and my daughter made her a card. She burst into tears when we handed them over and said we had restored her faith.

This weekend we went to collect a mountain bike for my daughter. The couple we collected it off sold another bike last year, they had a message from a guy in England during the full lockdown. The lady told him no as it was illegal to travel. Especially into wales. She then had a message off a lady who said they lived in the next village.
They agreed to sell it to her. The next day the English man rocks up to fetch the bike!!!
Turned out that the first man had made a second account and googled the next village to dupe them.