DS and his holiday and refusing to bail him out

[Namechangedbecauseofthis]

Ds is due to go on holiday in 13 days. He has only just realised in order to travel he needs to purchase a private PCR test.

I say only just realised I’ve been telling him for months to either move the holiday or make sure he has enough money for the test.

Two days ago he could have moved the holiday (TUI) free of charge.

The holiday was cheap, but now not cheap with the added PCRs on top.

Some of his mates are now making noise about losing their money if it can’t be changed, a couple of them are still going to go and take the PCR tests they have the funds.

We are not well off financially at all, however I could bail him out and pay for the PCR tests. Part of me thinks do this, the other part of me thinks. No I told him to bloody sort it and this is a shitty way to learn the hard way but he needs to grow up.

I’m not sure why they have left it so late, I can’t even wrap my head around that. I think lead booker just thought they would lose their deposits. The holiday needs to be paid, however they haven’t paid the final payment.

Can anyone advise? Can TUI move the holiday outside the 14 days? Should I bail him out? If they don’t pay for the holiday will they be liable for the cost still.

Thank you, I haven’t ignored those comments.
To clarify

Yes I can bail him out for the test coverage thank you for those that pointed out cheaper deals.

He has to quarantine when he gets back he is at risk of losing his job. A supermarket job that he does during holidays he isn’t a vital member od staff.

He hasn’t considered the amount of money he needs out there, he has less than £500 for a weeks holiday.

If something happens when he is out there, be it COVID related or something else that possibly isn’t covered by insurance I don’t have the money to bail him out.

Not all his friends can afford to go on said holiday either. The entire thing appears to be a shit show they have buried their head in the sand about.

TUI offer all the necessary tests when the holiday is booked for a very reasonable amount. I think it's very worrying that some offspring are so used to not having to think for themselves, as technology seems to do most of it for them, that there will be a generation unable to make a telephone call or sort out fairly simple problems.

Its ok to step back. Its hard to press a point with your mates so I understand how it got this way but he needs to learn to look at things himself. Very hard for you but I agree with your decision - you can't afford to bail out the further consequences so you can't support it now.

@Namechangedbecauseofthis - it sounds from others’ comments as though it’s worth finding out from TUI what they cover as part of the package holiday, so you can get an accurate idea of the costs your ds didn’t bother to think about. And don’t be too hard on him - he was just behaving like a 19-year old boy, taking his cue from his equally self-centred, irresponsible friends, and has no doubt learnt a lesson from this!

Hope this works

I know all the advantages of credit cards. But how can he get a credit card? He’s just left school and is going to university. You need proof of income or a job, surely.

DD applied when she turned 18. She never had to provide proof. Her initial limit was £200 and a couple of years later it's £1000. She just applied with her bank.

£500 for spending money for a week’s holiday sounds fine to me.

@Namechangedbecauseofthis

If he tests positive when out there, I can’t bail him out to the tune of whatever it costs to feed him and quarantine him in Greece.

No they haven’t paid the remainder it was due yesterday.

So don’t. He’s an adult. If they quarantine him in Greece what happens to the bill? It’s his and presumably he won’t be the only person who doesn’t have £2,000 on tap. What can they do but invoice him. No one has the space to keep impoverished tourists locked up for months on end.

LEND him the money he has to pay it back. If he has grandparents they can chip in with the loan

If he’s old enough to go on holiday on his own/with friends he’s old enough to sort the arrangements himself.

OP you have made the right decision. It’s not down to your parenting that he’s in this pickle, it’s down to him not listening. To be fair, that’s what 18 year olds do (I taught them for years), and it’s also how they learn to grow up - that their actions (or in this case non-actions) have consequences.

Ah the naivety of youth and I’d be mad at him too holidays are a luxury and one he can’t afford at such a young age and in his circumstances
I also don’t like the idea of throwing that money away but him going and it going wrong or him blowing all his money quickly and then needing more bail outs is another risk you can’t afford

I feel sorry for him and for the OP. He's got himself into something he hasn't fully understood and may well have lost his holiday if he hasn't paid the balance and the OP is understandably angry and frustrated.

I don't understand why he hasn't been aware of the TUI test packages though.

I think the best thing to do would be for the person who booked to contact TUI and ask if they could overlook the missed payment deadline and that for moving the date and ask if they could move the holiday until next summer.

Then they all have another year to save up and have the holiday they want.

If they quarantine him in Greece what happens to the bill?

It's been explained there isn't a cost in Greece.

I’m a softie. I’d try and help if I could.

@Namechangedbecauseofthis

I don’t know what he has factored in. Honestly I know this is overly dramatic but sometimes I think I’ve done a shitty job.

He is either incredibly naive or stupid. Mean I know but it’s not like coronavirus hasn’t been on the bloody tv/internet/ blinking you tube for 18 months.

Don’t beat yourself up. I have an 18year old and this is exactly how he operates- naively optimistic, leaving things until the last minute etc. These are such complicated times even for experienced travellers so really it’s not surprising he’s struggling. Doesn’t mean you’ve done a bad job .

If DS has already paid for the flights and hotel and you will pay for the test, £500 spending money looks plenty:

www.budgetyourtrip.com/greece

He needs to pay the outstanding balance straight away though, otherwise he may have no holiday to go on.

Oh, definitely don’t beat yourself up. This is hard and complicated for everyone and 19 is very young.

Bless him travelling is rather complicated at the moment, even for seasoned travellers.

It isn’t down to parenting OP ... at 18 one of mine spent a month inter railing around Europe ... did everything herself.

I had far more input into a rail ticket from London to Portsmouth with her sister.

Is he half board or self catering? £500 but with some meals provided so he won't starve if he miss-budgets sounds fine.

If it wasn't for covid and for example he'd forgotten travel insurance I would say bail him out.

I'd say it's classic 19 year old boy behaviour and I have had two of those. They do grow out of it . My DS went on a "lads" holiday after sixth form and while I helped him sort travel insurance and everything else he certainly learned a few life lesssons on that holiday.

However, it's not just about the pcr test, there's every chance of catching covid on holiday which would entail extended stay. Their insurance may or may not cover that. If they got the cheapest insurance they could find it probably wouldn't.
The bottom line is that to travel now you need plenty of money for unexpected complications. It's crap for their age group who have missed out on so much.

If he hasn’t paid the balance when due it might well have been automatically cancelled anyway. At least that means all he loses is the deposit, which might be the best result possible in the circumstances.

I don’t think he has a clue how much things cost abroad etc.

what the heck has he been doing for the last 19 years
If he is that clueless, I would absolutely send him to make him face the real world a bit, that's just so odd!

£500 is very tight, but as long as it doesn't include transport and accommodation, it's not that bad at 19. You can holiday on £70 a day in most countries. (again, when hotel and travel is sorted)

So many people aren’t reading the op @Namechangedbecauseofthis posts where she states she can’t afford to help him beyond the tests. She has no spare cash, not everyone has savings to give to their children in this situation even as a loan!

I’m sure if she had free flowing money she would probably help and bail him out more due to current circumstances. But she’s also done her bit by reminding them all to sort it and they still haven’t. If she hasn’t got the money beyond the tests she can’t give him any more, he will need a fair amount of spending money for drinking/eating and possibly trips etc. It’s going to be a rough lesson to learn for him but it’ll make him more organised in the future surely.

She’s right to be cautious of him getting home too, I’m seeing so many videos/reports of young ones in quarantine due to one testing positive while there etc.

Even if the £500 didn’t include meals, it’s still over £70 a day, which should be enough for basic meals or snacks and a few drinks. If they’re just planning on spending time at the beach and not hiring a car and going sightseeing, I think that’s enough. Re bailing him out, I would if I could. Can he investigate getting a basic credit card, perhaps linked to a student bank account? And he still has 13 days- enough time to earn a bit more money?