Do you agree with this statement regarding pain and child birth

[user6767]

Chatting to a few friends tonight about child birth. One of them made a statement that I had never really thought about before but I can definitely see her argument.

She basically said it's wrong that women have to bear the pain of childbirth. When for nearly all other invasive/painful procedures we would be given pain relief as standard. She pointed out whilst we do have options like epidural these are not standard and in the UK in particular a 'natural birth' is seen as ideal. Also that she thinks if men had to give birth there would already be many more pain relief options available by now.

I thought it was a really interesting view point. Wondering what others think?

Yes I agree. In France an epidural is standard in childbirth. This country is barbaric when it comes to women’s health.

I agree with her. She's not saying anything most of us haven't thought.

Is it due to the chance of medical intervention increasing with epidurals? I’ve never had one so I’m not sure how they affect the pushing sensation?

I do think they should invent something that you can use to numb you of all the pain as soon as first contraction hits. Gas n air doesn’t really make the pain go away, it just made me hazy and high

She’s right. If men had periods, got endo, fibroids, had to be pregnant, had miscarriages and give birth it would all be better managed, diagnosed earlier and much less painful.

We can put people on the moon but it takes 10 years to get an endo diagnosis.

Utter bullshit.

I’m derailing but it’s all part of the picture.

I also agree. Admittedly I don’t know the pain of a vaginal birth as I had an elcs, but the having to justify why I wanted one was ridiculous. And having had major surgery to deliver two children, I was then left to my own devices to care for them whilst being unable to move.

I wasn’t allowed to be alone for 24 hours after having minor surgery under a local, but was fine to care for newborns immediately alone 🤷🏻‍♀️

It’s a balance of risk though isn’t it? All interventions come with a risk of a negative side effect. Epidurals statistically increase the need for instrumental deliveries/worse tearing, drugs can pass into the baby causing issues with early breathing/latching etc.

Perhaps the balance needs to be that the interventions are readily available for those who need/request it but intervention free delivery treated as the default.

All of this with the caveat that it’s better to have interventions than have harm caused by refusal on ideological grounds.

Well, we are expected to have coil insertion, hysteroscopies etc with no pain relief so I'm guessing this is a problem with treatment of women not being what we should expect.

Absolutely agree

If you choose not to have pain relief that's fine but every woman should have access to epidurals etc

Why should any invasive procedure be standard? Epidurals aren't risk free! Childbirth unlike other medical situations is a choice. I had no pain relief and it honestly didn't hurt that much, it's not an acute pain and you get something wonderful. I gave birth in the USA and could have had whatever I wanted, even an elective c-section but I preferred not to.

Well it’s the same for any female health related issue. If men had periods there were be a lot more research into endometriosis. If men had to go through the menopause, HRT would be more widely available. If men were pregnant, they probably wouldn’t be told to muddle through with nausea or hayfever or joint pain or insomnia. If men have birth there would probably be significantly less birth injuries and research into preventing interventions.

I am in two minds on this one. Having had one long birth with intense pain and interventions and one smooth and more ‘natural’ birth where it really was the hypnobirthing chat of ‘powerful sensations’ rather than pain - I feel that situations in which women are helped to feel totally safe and supported, thus experiencing less pain, are the ideal. But before I get jumped on, I know that feeling safe will not necessarily stop a baby being back to back or other reasons pain may be very bad.

I totally agree on the part that if men gave birth the story would be different.

I do agree in principle (that women are expected to 'bear' the pain of childbirth as some kind of weird punishment for being female), but I also think birth is a one-of-a-kind process - physically very extreme, physiologically quite delicately balanced, no easy way to get rid of the pain without risking more interventions which cause real damage to the woman (forceps, ventouse etc)

Now, elective c-section on demand, no questions asked, if that's what the woman wants after understanding the pluses and minuses - that I agree with

I agree. I was denied an epidural with all 3 of my births and my last one they refused me gas and air! They just sort of ignore your requests for hours until it's too late

@MuchTooTired totally agree with you, as soon as you have a vaginal birth you’re expected to walk around, get dressed and care for a newborn baby, do night feeds and nappy changes. Even if you’ve had a tear and stitches. It baffles me!

I think it should be easier for women to access pain relief if they want it but many of what Is available has negative side effects so that has to be balanced out.

However I didn’t need any pain relief during labour and delivery (including no gas and air). I didn’t find it painful, just very intense and I would hate to have been in a situation whereby the minute I arrived in hospital. I was prepped for an epidural regardless of need or want.

Also the moment many women start saying they need pain relief / epidurals but it gets refused as ‘too late’ is when they’re in transition and imminently about to give birth. Many women don’t realise this though or haven’t been told about it. So IMO better informative care is needed all round.

@AnneLovesGilbert

She’s right. If men had periods, got endo, fibroids, had to be pregnant, had miscarriages and give birth it would all be better managed, diagnosed earlier and much less painful.

We can put people on the moon but it takes 10 years to get an endo diagnosis.

Utter bullshit.

I’m derailing but it’s all part of the picture.

Yes

My DH had a minor hernia operation the year before I had an emergency section, the difference in care and pain management was unbelievable

@gogohm not everybody has as smooth a time as you

@FindingMeno

I've had both of those, neither hurt enough to need pain relief, do I have no pain sensors???

Nothing is risk free, plus I chose the convenience of no sedition because I could drive and go straight to work. I get the feeling I'm not typical admittedly, I'm the one that nipped to the supermarket 6 hours after giving birth...

I actually disagree. The thing is its not a invasive/painful procedure, its not an operation. Its something our bodies have been designed to do, nearly all species have to go through it and I think we are actually geared heavily towards pain relief in the UK. On the other hand I do wonder why giving birth is so painful, humans have pain as a warning that something is wrong ie infection or injury. But with periods and babies I dont get why whoever designed us made it painful for us!

I agree.

Natural birth is seen as the ideal and its the default ‘right choice’. But it’s trying to achieve an outcome that isn’t natural (that women and baby survive unharmed in the way we would expect from modern medicine).

Patriarchal views about women meaning they are too often seen as mere vessels and treated like pieces of meat, with consent basically being an optional extra every now and then.

If men gave birth it’d all be sorted by now. Guaranteed.

@Hariboqueen1 I think it's sort of an evolutionary fuck up. Human babies are born extremely helpless (compared with most other species) - if they were born any earlier they wouldn't survive - but they're basically too big for a lot of women's pelvises by the time labour begins (or at the extreme of what women can physiologically cope with anyway). Humans started standing on two legs and the female pelvis got narrower to enable that. Large late babies + narrow pelvis = trouble

drugs can pass into the baby causing issues with early breathing/latching etc.

Oh yes good point. My son had to be resuscitated just after birth due to the pethidine I had in labour.

I agree, childbirth is horrific!!! I was in shock for about a week after my first, couldn’t believe anyone went through that to have a baby - was 48 hour difficult birth though

Can we please stop with the whole 'our bodies were designed to do this' malarkey
If I hadn't had a section, both my baby and I would have died. Maternal mortality was insanely high before modern medicine.

The persistence of this idea that natural birth is the norm and shouldn't be interfered with is so harmful to many women