Are you friends with anyone famous/extremely wealthy and do you find it hard to stay friends with them?

[Bellasblankexpression]

This isn't a humble brag, it will probably come across like one though.

I have a good friend who is very well known. We met as kids then I moved back to my home country but we stayed in touch over the years/visited a lot as we got older and have stayed good friends.

I've always found the shiny famous side of his life bizarre, it's so far removed from who he actually is, and I can't take it seriously when I see him on TV or whatever, but it's never really affected our friendship before, maybe because I knew him way before all the famous stuff.

Lately though, I've finding myself feeling incredibly envious of everything he's got and how easy it all is for him - he can still zip about on a private jet etc because he has the money, Covid quarantine costs etc aren't an issue, his house is like some kind of epic luxury hotel so it was hard to stomach when he was a 'bit fed up' with lockdown.

He's a really nice guy, so he's not a twat with it and incredibly generous, but it's almost like I can't stomach his success now? I've always been proud and happy for him, but I recently lost a lot of work, I'm self employed, but managing to stay afloat just, keep having problems with DS being sent home from nursery due to temp and struggling to keep hold of the few contracts I've got because of it, feel like life is stressy chaos....we mainly chat nonsense on whatsapp, but when actual life/what have you been up to stuff comes up I'm finding it difficult to not be a bit of an arse to him.

DH is surprised it hasn't happened sooner but I'm just a bit sad because we've been friends for so long! It's never been an issue before but the pandemic seems to have brought out the green eyed monster in me.

I just wondered if anyone else has managed to maintain a long-standing friendship with someone who lives in a world that is polar opposite to theirs? I'm kind of thinking this might be the point where we just grow apart and it makes me really sad, especially since I'm the one causing it.

And the reason I've mentioned that he's famous and high profile is because it's relevant - his life is SO SO different to mine, like could not be more different.

Nearly 20 years ago dd was in a class at her independent primary with the daughter of a family who figured on the Times rich list. They were a national haulage firm.

The mother was really nice - she even had French manicure style acrylics on her toenails and her dd at 5 wore Burberry skirts. Which personally I thought was a complete waste of money given the speed at which 5 year olds grow out of their clothes. Anyway her cash, her choice.

There was another mother that told me about their wealth in an ott arse-licking way. Wasn't impressed.

Anyway some years later, sadly tragedy struck. The grand-daughter of the founder received a souped up mini Cooper for her 17th or 18th birthday. She didn't have the maturity or skill to handle it. After a night out with friends but not drunk she hit either a brick wall or a tree on a country lane between Hale and Knutsford known locally as the Tatton mile at speed. I've known people do 100mph down this road.

She died instantly, her heart-broken grandfather sold the business to Stobarts.

The family members that I knew were really nice and ordinary. It was other people's sycophantic attitude that got me.

Another mum gave a toy BMW to the school for a raffle prize, she was chosen by the head to be class rep and her dd bullied dd mercilessly. The school did nothing at all and this woman controlled all the others. She treated me as if I were a prostitute from the bus station in the centre of Manchester because I worked.

Another mother knew her school in Alderley Edge and it staked its reputation on teaching girls to be able to get out of a car without showing their knickers.

She's probably moved to Prestbury now...

My late cousin ran a venture capital company in the Caymans, heaven knows how much money he had. His dw in 1971 had the biggest solitaire I'd even seen. She went back to California and got a Californian divorce, probably cost him the gdp of a small country.
He was a complete slimeball. He sidled up to me at his df's funeral when he was old enough for sheltered housing. Apparently the night before he announced that he'd decided that, in future he wouldn't look at any 'girl' older than half his age. My df had him sussed and I think scared the shit out of him. He came and had a chat to me, didn't stay for long. I must have given the subconscious impression that he was a lazy sleazy entitled twat, albeit a rich one. He was spoilt rotten by his mother, brilliant but lazy. Got a 3rd in maths from Kings in the 60s as he spent all his time at Somerset House doing family tree research, and scraped into a job as a maths teacher at a minor public school. He then decided his DM should fund a second degree in medecine - he was probably thinking of a Harley St abortion clinic. She said no, he'd had 1 chance. He had a tantrum and left the country.

His little brother is wealthy having worked for the IMF and the Bank of England. Not particularly clever like his dm but a grafter. Got redundancy and full pension, skipped off to a city firm as a specialist, then its MD and now an emeritus professor at LSE. For 60 years he's been as jealous as hell of me, because as an innocent 6 year old I was shown his maths homework and as I liked numbers I read it, understood it and found it easy. Put myself right in the shit, it was only his bloody Cambridge preparation homework. I have absolutely no recollection. He told me about 2 years ago. I pissed myself laughing and told him I couldn't believe he'd borne a stupid grudge for such a long time.

Human beings are a funny lot, me included and I'm off my head on Tramadol due to sinus pain at the moment.

@MizMoonshine

I'm calling Henry Cavill

I thought he was from Jersey (Channel Islands), not the US.

@newtb

Nearly 20 years ago dd was in a class at her independent primary with the daughter of a family who figured on the Times rich list. They were a national haulage firm.

The mother was really nice - she even had French manicure style acrylics on her toenails and her dd at 5 wore Burberry skirts. Which personally I thought was a complete waste of money given the speed at which 5 year olds grow out of their clothes. Anyway her cash, her choice.

There was another mother that told me about their wealth in an ott arse-licking way. Wasn't impressed.

Anyway some years later, sadly tragedy struck. The grand-daughter of the founder received a souped up mini Cooper for her 17th or 18th birthday. She didn't have the maturity or skill to handle it. After a night out with friends but not drunk she hit either a brick wall or a tree on a country lane between Hale and Knutsford known locally as the Tatton mile at speed. I've known people do 100mph down this road.

She died instantly, her heart-broken grandfather sold the business to Stobarts.

The family members that I knew were really nice and ordinary. It was other people's sycophantic attitude that got me.

Another mum gave a toy BMW to the school for a raffle prize, she was chosen by the head to be class rep and her dd bullied dd mercilessly. The school did nothing at all and this woman controlled all the others. She treated me as if I were a prostitute from the bus station in the centre of Manchester because I worked.

Another mother knew her school in Alderley Edge and it staked its reputation on teaching girls to be able to get out of a car without showing their knickers.

She's probably moved to Prestbury now...

My late cousin ran a venture capital company in the Caymans, heaven knows how much money he had. His dw in 1971 had the biggest solitaire I'd even seen. She went back to California and got a Californian divorce, probably cost him the gdp of a small country.
He was a complete slimeball. He sidled up to me at his df's funeral when he was old enough for sheltered housing. Apparently the night before he announced that he'd decided that, in future he wouldn't look at any 'girl' older than half his age. My df had him sussed and I think scared the shit out of him. He came and had a chat to me, didn't stay for long. I must have given the subconscious impression that he was a lazy sleazy entitled twat, albeit a rich one. He was spoilt rotten by his mother, brilliant but lazy. Got a 3rd in maths from Kings in the 60s as he spent all his time at Somerset House doing family tree research, and scraped into a job as a maths teacher at a minor public school. He then decided his DM should fund a second degree in medecine - he was probably thinking of a Harley St abortion clinic. She said no, he'd had 1 chance. He had a tantrum and left the country.

His little brother is wealthy having worked for the IMF and the Bank of England. Not particularly clever like his dm but a grafter. Got redundancy and full pension, skipped off to a city firm as a specialist, then its MD and now an emeritus professor at LSE. For 60 years he's been as jealous as hell of me, because as an innocent 6 year old I was shown his maths homework and as I liked numbers I read it, understood it and found it easy. Put myself right in the shit, it was only his bloody Cambridge preparation homework. I have absolutely no recollection. He told me about 2 years ago. I pissed myself laughing and told him I couldn't believe he'd borne a stupid grudge for such a long time.

Human beings are a funny lot, me included and I'm off my head on Tramadol due to sinus pain at the moment.

Do you work for a gossip mag? You seem a bit over invested in people's lives.

I'm off my head on Tramadol
it's clearly winkled lots of memories outta your brain😁
interesting stuff👀

I have a famous wealthy friend. They have so much more money than I do and many opportunities but I wouldn’t swap being able to go to tescos, not having my every movement photographed, not having my relationship always written about, not having people trying to be friends with you for personal gain and so much more, with what they have

^
The only time it has grated slightly is when his suggestions would be to "just" do something/buy something, and he was oblivious to how out of reach that was.^

@KeyboardWorriers my friend had that this year. DH is out of work due to illness and they'd been busy fixing up the house. Her very lovely but very well off parents helpfully suggested why they couldn't just 'get someone in'. Using up a big chunk of their income would have took them into debt but they were just so used to throwing money at the problem they didn't stop to think that others might not be able to likewise.

Oh well I really thought it was Chris Evans as his best friend for 30 years has a baby as well!

I think your friendship has lasted is because he knows he can trust you, your not fangirling or awkward around him, and that he does not have to put a facade up or stay within whatever 'role' he is in just to please people. At the end of the day he shits and breathes the same as everyone else!! Treasure your friendship because they are hard to find!

@Bellasblankexpression

We talk about the usual stuff! Nonsense, our families, work, politics, news etc

Come on, I’m not going to say even if people do guess - I’ve tweaked a detail or two so he’s not easily identifiable (and so I’m not as well incase he randomly sees this thread unlikely as that is).

Not Captain America (I wish!), although I have met Chris Evans a few times and he was utterly lovely.

dies of envy

I have a friend (not the closest) who's in a small club I attend. She lives in a beautiful house with a swimming pool, she and her DH both drive a big car each and in normal times they go on cruises at least twice a year. There's little connection apart from the hobby - I think the wealth causes a barrier because the rest of us are most definitely not rich. She's very confident so it's hard to warm to her even though she's down to earth and not at all affected. One can't help but feel that her definition of sometimes having to 'count the pennies' is not quite the same as ours.

Yet, her life is not a bed of roses. There's been very serious illness and they've been burgled a few times.

I had a similar thread a few weeks ago, it’s a family member not a friend though although some of the issues are the same. I had some useful advice www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/4260510-I-don-t-know-what-to-talk-about-with-them-anymore

Thank you prince

🙈 I’m not going to say who it is even if people guess! Sorry!

I’m going to make an effort to go and see him in a week or so if I can work out Covid procedures!

14:37newtb

Nearly 20 years ago dd was in a class at her independent primary with the daughter of a family who figured on the Times rich list. They were a national haulage firm.

The mother was really nice - she even had French manicure style acrylics on her toenails and her dd at 5 wore Burberry skirts. Which personally I thought was a complete waste of money given the speed at which 5 year olds grow out of their clothes. Anyway her cash, her choice.

There was another mother that told me about their wealth in an ott arse-licking way. Wasn't impressed.

Anyway some years later, sadly tragedy struck. The grand-daughter of the founder received a souped up mini Cooper for her 17th or 18th birthday. She didn't have the maturity or skill to handle it. After a night out with friends but not drunk she hit either a brick wall or a tree on a country lane between Hale and Knutsford known locally as the Tatton mile at speed. I've known people do 100mph down this road.

She died instantly, her heart-broken grandfather sold the business to Stobarts.

The family members that I knew were really nice and ordinary. It was other people's sycophantic attitude that got me.

Another mum gave a toy BMW to the school for a raffle prize, she was chosen by the head to be class rep and her dd bullied dd mercilessly. The school did nothing at all and this woman controlled all the others. She treated me as if I were a prostitute from the bus station in the centre of Manchester because I worked.

Another mother knew her school in Alderley Edge and it staked its reputation on teaching girls to be able to get out of a car without showing their knickers.

She's probably moved to Prestbury now...

My late cousin ran a venture capital company in the Caymans, heaven knows how much money he had. His dw in 1971 had the biggest solitaire I'd even seen. She went back to California and got a Californian divorce, probably cost him the gdp of a small country.
He was a complete slimeball. He sidled up to me at his df's funeral when he was old enough for sheltered housing. Apparently the night before he announced that he'd decided that, in future he wouldn't look at any 'girl' older than half his age. My df had him sussed and I think scared the shit out of him. He came and had a chat to me, didn't stay for long. I must have given the subconscious impression that he was a lazy sleazy entitled twat, albeit a rich one. He was spoilt rotten by his mother, brilliant but lazy. Got a 3rd in maths from Kings in the 60s as he spent all his time at Somerset House doing family tree research, and scraped into a job as a maths teacher at a minor public school. He then decided his DM should fund a second degree in medecine - he was probably thinking of a Harley St abortion clinic. She said no, he'd had 1 chance. He had a tantrum and left the country.

His little brother is wealthy having worked for the IMF and the Bank of England. Not particularly clever like his dm but a grafter. Got redundancy and full pension, skipped off to a city firm as a specialist, then its MD and now an emeritus professor at LSE. For 60 years he's been as jealous as hell of me, because as an innocent 6 year old I was shown his maths homework and as I liked numbers I read it, understood it and found it easy. Put myself right in the shit, it was only his bloody Cambridge preparation homework. I have absolutely no recollection. He told me about 2 years ago. I pissed myself laughing and told him I couldn't believe he'd borne a stupid grudge for such a long time.

Human beings are a funny lot, me included and I'm off my head on Tramadol due to sinus pain at the moment.

God almighty, there's a helluva lot of revealing detail there!!

I know someone who is an iconic international pop star.
And honestly, she has the same worries as the rest of us, despite her fame & wealth.
Her mother died a few years ago & her brother now has cancer. Fame & wealth do not mean pure happiness OP. Shit still happens.
Money is not really what life is all about.

Yes it’s true, and I know this - he has his own struggles and anxiety etc, just like the rest of us.
And it’s why I’ve been annoyed with myself about how I’ve been feeling

Why do you think he is still single if he wants to settle down? What age range is he?

Money is not really what life is all about
True but you do need a certain amount of it in order to participate fully in life, the more you have more opportunities you can take advantage of (all other things being equal) but it doesn't guarantee good luck.
Then again I've never had any rich friends so what do I know 🤷‍♀️
I have a friend with famous wealthy siblings and I know she finds that hard.

Money isn’t everything but I’d still like to win the lottery

@Smurfsarethefuture I just think he hasn’t met the right person yet, he’s had relationships that have been serious but it just hasn’t worked out. He is picky as well, to be fair! 😂

@Smurfsarethefuture wasn’t ignoring your question re age bracket but don’t really want to say as it will make him easier to identify!

@Packingsoapandwater

One of my oldest friends is very wealthy. Family money.

It never used to bother me at all, but as I've got older, probably because I'm older and can now see the outcomes of choices people of my peer group have made, I do see how her wealth innoculated her from the repercussions of some very poor decisions she made when she was younger, decisions that would have wrecked most other people's lives.

It's not the money per se, or the ability to acquire a certain lifestyle, but the security it gave her that I feel most keenly now. If she disliked a job, she simply left it. When a cohabiting relationship broke down, she simply told him to leave. She was never going to end up homeless, or with only a tenner in her account, or working a miserable job because she needed the money until she found something better.

Whereas my life has been very much about considering all that could go wrong if I made a certain decision, because I didn't have that security. I've had to be very risk adverse because there wasn't much between me and the poor house, so to speak.

It's the emotional and psychological burden of all that - - the fear, I guess - - that her wealth rendered absent.

I grew up wealthy, as did my mom. And I've honestly never felt the pure fear of what would happen if I ran out of money. A day or two here or there waiting for my salary to come in, but that's about it. I know how incredibly privileged that makes me, and I never asked my parents for handouts. But - and it's a big but - I've always known I could if I wanted to, and it would've been instantaneous. My kids will be the same. It doesn't mean I don't know how to do a day's graft, plaster a smile on my face, some bosses are dicks etc etc. It's just I always had the option of telling anyone to go fuck themselves anytime I wanted

[quote Bellasblankexpression]@Ratonastick you’re so right - I know he values our friendship as he goes out of his way to make me feel special/appreciated not always big gestures little things too. Especially if he’s been working away for a while and not had much time to chat as usual.

It’s why I was surprised when I realised I was feeling like this.[/quote]
He seriously sounds like a dote OP. It'll be grand, give your head a gentle wobble, go see him and eat pizza and drink wine in your pjs. I bet he can't wait to see you

No problem @Bellasblankexpression

Reminds me of pictures I’ve seen of someone famous and successful who seemingly has everything but I looks so unhappy and sad, almost tearful at times.

Oh no - not saying your friend is! I am just thinking out loud that money doesn’t insulate you from everything - even though it seems it from the outside.

@Smurfsarethefuture he’s not depressed as such but he sad that certain things haven’t worked out the way he hoped and suffers from mental health issues. But he loves his work for the most part, just not the celebrity, and takes great pride in a lot of his projects.

Having said that as a previous poster said he could easily go out and get someone to marry him and have a wife but he’s holding out for someone special he really clicks with and wants to spend his life with.

I’m looking forward to the visit, I’ve got to do a PCR test and isolate etc, but I think it will be worth it. On retrospect I’m having a bit of difficulty with other friends for different reasons - I think Covid and lockdown has just made me forget how to socialise sometimes. I feel like I have nothing to talk about, so it’s definitely not him it’s me at the moment

@AGirlCalledJohnny I think this is it isn’t it the knowing that you don’t have to worry :) a lovely position to be in though

I think Covid and lockdown has just made me forget how to socialise sometimes

I think a lot of people feel like this. We’ve lost our normal routine. He probably has a touch of it too.