he is angry i haven't waxed down there?

[wdjav]

In fact he’s angry about most things.

Without going into too much detail, I keep hair short down there but never go for a wax. It’s not bushy or long. I shave regularly. I just don’t want a wax. He said the other day that I must be the only woman who is happy with that and he’s shocked I don’t want my arsehole waxed specifically.

Other comments have been why do I think it’s ok not to wear heels into the office. Why do I slob out in a tracksuit when home from work. Why don’t I wear make up everyday. Why does my eyeliner wear off during the day...he’s noticed our mutual friend’s eyeliners stays on an entire night and looks the same from 7pm to 11pm, would I like him to get me the same one??

Recently I moved during sex as felt slight pain due to the position. I just wanted to re position. He pulled out and stormed off slamming the door saying what’s wrong with me?? I started to cry. The next morning he looked at me and mockingly sniggered and said who cries during sex?

I’m just so sad. No other ties to him so could leave easily. I’m 36, 37 at the end of the year though. It’s so scary to think about starting over. I feel sick when I think about staying and sick when I think about leaving. I will end up alone either way.

I would leave him and have a child using a sperm donor.

In the time you've taken to post this you could have packed a bag and left.

I know you're looking for a handhold here, but what you actually need is a kick up the arse. What are you doing with this man? Just leave. You've already waste enough time on him and if you want to try for a life with a partner and kids then you need to leave him today and get on with that.

If you have a family with this man your life will get infinately worse. 37 is not too old to start again. Imagine if you had a child who grew up to think men should be like this. I left an abuser in my 30s and within weeks my life got better in all aspects. I now have a child with a wonderful man. You can do this too. Please leave and make a new life in a positive environment. X

Please leave. He sounds identical to my ex (if his name begins with H). It’s emotional abuse. Constant belittling it will destroy you.

Leave now and slowly get your independence and self confidence back. You won’t look back. You’ll be free.

Have you anywhere you can go?

How long have you been with this scrotum for?

Oh God, op, he's absolutely horrible. Dump his sorry ass and get out of there, find someone who will appreciate you.

He sounds like he actually hates you. Tell him to fuck right off. You deserve more.

I really understand the fear of leaving and starting over in your 30s, I've been there. But you know he is abusive and this relationship is damaging you. You can't have children with him, the control and abuse will escalate. He is likely to behave this way to the child as well.
I left and started again at 38, I thought it was too late but I knew I had to leave. My self esteem is so much better. I also met someone and am in a loving and healthy relationship with a baby due in October. It can be done and is worth it.

You can think about a baby after you have left him and are feeling stronger. Leaving him will make you a million times happier. And you're not losing anything - you wouldn't have had a baby with him because of his behaviour, so the sooner you cut him loose, the sooner you can think about what you want to do with the rest of your life. You have other options.

OP you do need to leave him but understand how hard it must feel. You do know that your average woman comes in all levels of hairy-ness. It's fine for a partner to have a preference, it's not fine for them to mock you and have you fit into their preference.

But all those things are vile, that's not how a man behaves with a woman he loves.

I met my now DH of 25 years at work. We were part of a group of temps and the chat could be very open as I guess we all knew these weren't people we would be spending a lot of time with. Anyway, one day the conversation got to body hair (men's and women's) and now DH said that he really couldn't care less, if you wanted to be intimate enough with someone then you must like them enough that a bit of hair isn't going to put you off. He wasn't alone amongst the men there either.

I believe that porn has a lot to answer for in terms of younger men's expectations.

This is so abusive. You really do deserve more.

A man like this could become dangerous. Dont become a DV stat.

I hope you have some support to extract him from your life

@wdjav

Yes I had wanted a family. 37 in November and I am in tears thinking about that.

I understand this. But you should not / must not have a family with him. He would put you and any babies / children through hell.

You could meet someone decent and have a child in 12 months.
You could choose to have a child alone.
Either would be infinitely preferable to this prospect.

I am speaking as a person who has got ensnared in a number of abusive relationships. Children makes it far harder to leave (I left)

Do you rent together/own together ?
What is keeping you there, do you have somewhere to go ?

Honestly, being away from an abusive man is a good thing. Its scary beforehand and scary when you first do it. But when you realise that you really can be the person you want to be and do what you want to do, its all worth it.

Wow he sounds a real peach. You have the power to change the position you're in, it may seem scary starting again but I'd be far more scared of still being in the same position in 10/20 years time. You're 37 not 87 you've a hell of a lot of living to do for your own sake don't waste any more time on this arsehole.

37 is not that old. But every day, every week every year you start, you are getting older, unhappier and more degraded by his behaviour. Leave now

What an abusive arsehole.
Why does he feel you need to look a certain way, it's creepy.

Please leave if you have somewhere safe to go to.
It's scary but you can do this.

Tell him to wax his arse crack, balls, legs... in fact ask him to wax all his body hair. If he says no, then call him a hypocrite.

I'm usually all for people trying to work their relationship out. There are so many flippant comments in this website telling women to ditch men over trivial things and I hate it, but this is one case that I think you need to leave him. He has no respect for you and that's going to make you incredibly unhappy if you stay. Men like this don't change. He has major issues. Go and find someone who appreciates you for who you are.

Fwiw, I rock a full bush and my husband can't keep his hands off me. Most blokes wouldn't care.

Please leave him.

@HollowTalk

Come on, you know this man is absolutely horrible, disgusting and abusive. How can you even think of staying with him? You deserve so much more.

This LTB today OP

Oh you definitely need to sort your hairy twat out - pack his bags and throw him out the door!

I think you know what you have to do. You know his behaviour is awful and it is now just a case of gathering your courage and making the necessary arrangements to leave. Once you are away from him you can calmly think about having a child on your own via sperm donor and then get on with the rest of your life. You can do this Op, you know you can.

He is an abusive loser cunt OP. But you know that. Please make sure you leave asap. It won't ever get any better. Quite the opposite. You can be happy. But not with this specimen.

Goodness, that's just horrible.
I can only reiterate what the others have said. You know you deserve better. I've recently started out on my own and I'm 42. Granted, I dont want any children but it has been the best thing I've done!!

On a side note, I never knew waxing ones Arsehole was a popular 'thing'. It sounds terrifying!!.

At 37 you still have time, but every single day you stay with this abusive monster is another day less of living the life you deserve.

Pack your bag & leave today OP x