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Original poster

he is angry i haven't waxed down there?

601 replies

wdjav · 22/05/2021 09:59

In fact he’s angry about most things.

Without going into too much detail, I keep hair short down there but never go for a wax. It’s not bushy or long. I shave regularly. I just don’t want a wax. He said the other day that I must be the only woman who is happy with that and he’s shocked I don’t want my arsehole waxed specifically.

Other comments have been why do I think it’s ok not to wear heels into the office. Why do I slob out in a tracksuit when home from work. Why don’t I wear make up everyday. Why does my eyeliner wear off during the day...he’s noticed our mutual friend’s eyeliners stays on an entire night and looks the same from 7pm to 11pm, would I like him to get me the same one?? Hmm

Recently I moved during sex as felt slight pain due to the position. I just wanted to re position. He pulled out and stormed off slamming the door saying what’s wrong with me?? I started to cry. The next morning he looked at me and mockingly sniggered and said who cries during sex?

I’m just so sad. No other ties to him so could leave easily. I’m 36, 37 at the end of the year though. It’s so scary to think about starting over. I feel sick when I think about staying and sick when I think about leaving. I will end up alone either way.

OP posts:
Lastchancesalonco · 22/05/2021 18:47

Run don’t walk
He is vile
He doesn’t care about you
He doesn’t respect you
You deserve better
Everyone deserves better

Mintjulia · 22/05/2021 18:50

OP, imagine being free of this lowlife, being able to eat whatever you like, watch whatever you want (because I bet you can't now).

Imagine being able to go to bed, clean fresh sheets and starfish the whole bed to yourself.

Imagine waking up, having a long leisurely bath, dressing as you wish, going out to lunch with a friend. All without nastiness, just peace and calm.

Trust me it's bliss. Just walk away. You can do it It will be the best day of your life Wink

Whoopsmahoot · 22/05/2021 18:55

Leave now, it will get worse. He has no respect for you

PlanetOfTheApesLives · 22/05/2021 18:58

He is vile. Your confidence is low due to constant criticism.
You don't have to live like this

Yummymummy2020 · 22/05/2021 19:00

You can still have a family, but to have one with him would be setting yourself and your kids up for a miserable existance. The sooner you leave the sooner you can meet someone lovely that deserves you. I appreciate it’s scary and nothing is guaranteed but staying with this awful man is setting you up for more misery! Quit while you are ahead!!!!

RogueRebel · 22/05/2021 19:02

@wdjav please don't think of leaving him as starting all over again - you aren't starting again you are starting from experience!

By leaving this horrible man you are opening yourself up to something better. You could meet someone in the next week month year and still be better off than you are now.

prettylittlestar · 22/05/2021 19:03

Wtaf- tell him there are people who don't wax still. We don't want to all look like porn stars.

Spotsandstars · 22/05/2021 19:09

I'm literally sat here willing you to leave. I beg you, this is no way to live. It's not normal, not every guy is like this and you are definitely young enough to start again. In fact you are in the prime of you life.

TheWatersofMarch · 22/05/2021 19:14

DaffodilThanksplease leave, you deserve better, much, much better. I don't know you but I hate this man for treating you like this. Xxx

Passionfruitpizza · 22/05/2021 19:18

He's disgusting and abusive.
Having a family connected to him would be worse than not having one. Plenty of my friends have met someone in their late 30s and then started a family so being 37 doesn't mean it won't ever happen.

newnortherner111 · 22/05/2021 19:32

A desert island seems as if it would be the only acceptable place for him to live. One without women, as he seems to be disgusting.

As others have said, please leave him.

Doomsdayisstillcoming · 22/05/2021 19:42

The for the love of God don’t propagate this cunts genes.

Christmasfairy2020 · 22/05/2021 19:51

Go on channel 4 catch up and watch 7 year switch. He reminds me of a man on there !!

A never wax never have done. I shave. I put make up on for evening school run (wfh) I wear jeans and a top all day. My hair is mostly in a pony tail except weekend. I am going into work next week and ill put a dress and make up on but it doesn't stay on.

Watchingyouwazowski · 22/05/2021 19:51

@wdjav
You can do it! Have faith in yourself and you WILL get through it and find a much better life for yourself. I'm 46. I do have children so I'm not saying that my situation is the same as yours, however, things will NEVER get better if you stay. I finally got out of an abusive relationship 2 months ago. I tried when I was your age too but got sucked back in. Even a few weeks before I separated I was wondering if I was too old to do it. I don't regret for a second that I did it but I do regret not having had the strength to do it years ago.
I really believe you will feel so much better when you are free from his abuse. I wholeheartedly recommend the Freedom program, too.
Good Luck x

beeloubee · 22/05/2021 19:54

Please don't put up with this any longer. He sounds awful. Cut him loose and find a nice guy.

newtb · 22/05/2021 19:55

OP I left an abusive marriage at 61 after 40 years. Don't be me!

Otoh learning to sext in French is quite good fun. There've been a good few frogs along the way on old.

BlossomingSlowly · 22/05/2021 20:02

@wdjav

In fact he’s angry about most things.

Without going into too much detail, I keep hair short down there but never go for a wax. It’s not bushy or long. I shave regularly. I just don’t want a wax. He said the other day that I must be the only woman who is happy with that and he’s shocked I don’t want my arsehole waxed specifically.

Other comments have been why do I think it’s ok not to wear heels into the office. Why do I slob out in a tracksuit when home from work. Why don’t I wear make up everyday. Why does my eyeliner wear off during the day...he’s noticed our mutual friend’s eyeliners stays on an entire night and looks the same from 7pm to 11pm, would I like him to get me the same one?? Hmm

Recently I moved during sex as felt slight pain due to the position. I just wanted to re position. He pulled out and stormed off slamming the door saying what’s wrong with me?? I started to cry. The next morning he looked at me and mockingly sniggered and said who cries during sex?

I’m just so sad. No other ties to him so could leave easily. I’m 36, 37 at the end of the year though. It’s so scary to think about starting over. I feel sick when I think about staying and sick when I think about leaving. I will end up alone either way.

I'm so sorry you are going through this. As I'm sure you know, leaving him would be the best option as this sounds far from a healthy relationship. You have every right not to wax and to want to feel confident and cared for in a relationship.

WomensAid offer counselling for women who have been in abusive relationships. I'd recommend visiting their website for advice, information and stories of others who have been in similar situations and have gotten through it. Your GP could also signpost you to help and resources to aid you in getting through this difficult time.

You deserve to feel happy. Sending hugs Thanks

ginghamstarfish · 22/05/2021 20:08

Please get this sad excuse for a man out of your life. You do have time to meet someone else and have a family!

Greenmarmalade · 22/05/2021 20:08

Leave ASAP so you don’t waste another minute with him.
You absolutely have time to meet someone and have a child.

A baby with this man would be hell on earth. Pregnancy- you’d be “too sick, too fat, too lazy”
He’d ramp up the abuse.
You’d feel like dying from exhaustion and misery parenting with him.

Being single and happy is a MUCH better option.

AntiSocialDistancer · 22/05/2021 20:12

I'd rather marry my own bumhair than that man.

Goawaymuppet · 22/05/2021 20:18

This made me so sad. You really need to leave him. I'm so sorry you've had to put up with this. You deserve better - he sounds appalling.

dancealittleclosertome · 22/05/2021 20:27

I am sorry for how you feel, and I do understand how worried you must feel about being 37 etc, but this man will not make a good father - he will be abusive to his children and that will be totally unbearable for you.

It is much better to leave him now, and find yourself someone else. And I do know that that is easier said than done, but if you view it like a project - get on loads of dating sites, paid ones even, and make it very clear that you are not just looking for 'fun' - that you are actually hoping to settle down and have a family - then that will weed out anyone who doesn't want that hopefully. There are men who want that, really there are. Set the age range wide. Nothing wrong with a 37 year old woman dating a 30 year old man, for example (dh is 12 years younger than me and we've been together 21 years Grin).

He's a disgusting arsehole and you deserve infinitely better.

friedafried · 22/05/2021 20:28

Tell him to duck off

Chickoletta · 22/05/2021 20:29

LTB and don’t look back.

Dolmiofamilyxo · 22/05/2021 20:31

Get out now. Staying with somebody like that is far scarier than ever starting over afresh and taking responsibility for your mental and physical health. His behaviour is abusive and will not change. You do NOT want to build a life and potentially have children with this person. You have no ties to him (fortunately) so do it now before you change your mind or you will still be living this miserable life in 5 years wondering what happened. Don’t waste your life.