How is this not murder?(upsetting)

[OhToBeASeahorse]

A mother has appeared in court today charged with the manslaughter of her toddler.

She left her, alone, for 6 days.

How can this not be murder? I don't understand.

From the DM article

"Cameras showed Kudi leaving the building on December 5 at 5.39pm. .

She did not return until December 11, when at 6.06pm she dialled 999 telling a call handler her baby would not wake up.

A few days later, staff at the Brighton mother and baby unit for teen mothers where they had been living contacted police after reviewing CCTV footage. "

@StormcloakNord

I know on an emotional level it's horrific and it really does seem like murder.

However I suppose if you go by the definition of murder in the eyes of the law, she didn't deliberate kill the child. The child died as a result of severe neglect/abandonment so man slaughter it is.

Whether that's right or wrong is a different story!

Surely not feeding or giving a drink to your child for nearly a week is a deliberate decision to kill them though, or is it let her die so "less" bad?

@ismiseeire

I wonder what prompted the YMCA staff to check the CCTV? From my reading of the article, it wasn't police who did this? Or maybe the police requested CCTV from the staff?

Presumably the police requested it as part of the investigation

Morally it is. Fingers crossed there is a hell for people like this to go and burn in for all of eternity

Presumably the police requested it as part of the investigation

Nope - article states 'A few days later, staff at the Brighton mother and baby unit for teen mothers where they had been living contacted police after reviewing CCTV footage.'

It is just so hard to understand what state of mind someone would have to be in to voluntarily leave their young child alone for 6 days that I think finding ‘excuses’ is the only way people can process it.

My main recurring nightmare is that I am in the middle of a dream, doing whatever, and suddenly think I have left my children at home on their own. This so terrifying that I usually spontaneously wake up in a cold sweat. The idea that someone could actually do this, not just for one night but for six, is really beyond what I can imagine.

One simple lesson to be learned would be some sort of roll-call system for mothers and children. Years ago, I lived in a women's refuge. You could come and go as you pleased, but you had to sign in and sign out. It would have been easy for the operators of the home to have stipulated something similar.

I have no strong feelings towards the mother, as so little is known. My heart is breaking for that little girl however. Such a cute little thing with her little top-knots in her hair. So dreadfully sad. Her mother must have cared for her at some point, to even a basic extent. Otherwise the staff there should have noticed signs of ongoing neglect. It's baffling.

Some people are just selfish, why don’t people realise that, it doesn’t mean that there’s all these reasons, it’s just selfish that’s all. I know someone like this when I was younger she would leave her kid with anyone for a night out, she could usually find people maybe this one couldn’t find anyone to have her child, most people don’t really want to baby sit and she probably couldn’t get anyone to so off she went, probably just didn’t like giving up her life and being stuck at home with a baby whilst all her friends were having fun. I really disgusted none of them did anything though, sounds like they were aware

@HoppingPavlova

This is why kids shouldn’t have kids.

That’s ridiculous, many teenagers are amazing parents. More like why hopeless cases should have children removed earlier than given chance after chance after chance.

I have a friend whose mother abandoned her and her 5 sisters in a caravan for days many years ago. They were found alone with nothing but an empty box of cornflakes, sleeping on a flea infested mattress only. The youngest child was my friend - aged 2. My friend went on to become a teen mum herself aged 16. She now has 4 children. She has struggled over the years with alcoholism and heroin addiction. She is recently clean and off all substances. Despite her addictions, she has managed to successfully rear her family, with her eldest now at university.

@Twobrews

This is why kids shouldn’t have kids. I knew someone would post this. It's a shitty thing to say.

I don’t agree with the statement but it’s not as shitty as the excuses being made for her!

I agree @pollylocketpickedapocket

How can teenagers be amazing parents?

They bring a child without being able to provide for the child, they depend on someone else to provide for a roof, for food, for clothings. How is that responsible parenting?

Does anyone know what exactly the young teen mum was doing. Yes it says she was celebrating her birthday but who knows maybe she was given date rape drugs and awful things happened to her during those days - we just don't know

@ismiseeire

We need to unpick everything to try and reduce the risk of this happening in the future.

Let's leave that up to the professionals actually involved in the case eh?

Sorry I wasn't clear. I meant the Serious case review that will happen needs to unpick what happened.

@ChardonnaysPetDragon

How can teenagers be amazing parents?

They bring a child without being able to provide for the child, they depend on someone else to provide for a roof, for food, for clothings. How is that responsible parenting?

So many adults do that too 😁

I have read some of the gossip on Instagram and YouTube with regards to the case. Her sister implies that they originally believed the child died of flu? Then obviously the CCTV evidence came out that proved she had been left alone.
I suspect the child was already quite ill (Or deceased) when the mother left meaning she may have been to weak to cry hence noone hearing her.
I also suspect that if this was a case of child trafficking then the police would have a good idea of that. To me the comment made by the police about her being supported by "various agencies" shows that she was offered support and blatantly chose the lifestyle she was in which ultimately led to her daughter's death.
Do I believe she is evil? No. However I do think she had enough awareness that you cannot leave a child alone for six days. She selfishly chose her own needs before her daughter's and she must be punished for that.

There were also photos and comments on social media of her partying during this period. There was nothing on them to suggest she was coerced or forcibly stopped from returning to her daughter.

Unfortunately, no punishment is going to be adequate and no punishment is going to undo the hell that little baby went through before her death and no punishment is going to bring her back.

I also wondered if she was very poorly or sadly gone before the mother left. Otherwise I think crying would have alerted someone. Hideous circumstances.

There’s lots of people asking why no one heard the baby cry - neglected babies often don’t cry - they’ve learned already that no-one comes.

@IrmaFayLear

I’m sure that many rapists (perhaps all rapists, even) have a troubled background. Should we “understand” them and excuse their acts? Animal abusers? Child molesters?

It’s the standard get out of jail free card now. I can only hope that juries think it is an overused one.

Try to understand them, so we can prevent others doing the same? Yes

Excuse their acts? Not for a second.

it's not complicated.

Why, why, why do these awful things continue to happen. A single Mum, with a penchant for running away, should not have been left without any support or supervision. It's hard to understand how although not being under social services, she then went on to do something so negligent. She must have been deemed a decent parent at some point. I just don't understand it.