My lumpy midriff immortalised in wedding photos

[rainbowowl]

My youngest Dsis is getting married (fingers crossed) in September this year. Eldest Dsis is abroad, and will not make it to wedding because of the travel restrictions where she lives.

She's asked me to be one of 3 bridesmaids, my eldest DD is a flower girl.
I'm happy to be, and especially as Dsis can't make it, I want to make sure I'm doing everything to make sure her wedding goes smoothly and she enjoys the day.

But good Lord. I look like a sack of potatoes in the dress. I'll also be standing next to two, slender, beautiful 20-somethings, as a 5'2" mid-30s mum of two - one of whom quite recently left my potato body!

I've lost around 40lbs, very happy with that, but any advice on what I can do to help the entirety of my lower half (where the dress clings) I'm intending to eat well and exercise until the day - recommendation on anything... apart from running... I'll try it if I really have to!

Any excellent shapewear? The kind that doesn't roll up or down, preferably neck to ankle and one where you don't wet yourself trying to go to the loo.

I'll post a pic of the dress if that helps?

Wild idea but could you wear cropped leggings under it to hide your VPL and smooth out any lumps and bumps?

OP, I wouldn't panic - if you want to (and only if you want to) you could tone up/lose weight in that time. If not then don't worry!

That dress is unforgiving.

Much like I'd be if my sister insisted I wore it! (Though no one with an ounce of sense would!! I'd look beyond hideous!). I'd go with getting pregnant, quickly!!

I'm sure running would help!

How far away do you think you could get by September? 🤣

Slightly easier solution - size up & take it in where you want and then wear a silk slip underneath. If you go for Spanx pack a change in the larger bag and get changed out of it for dinner.

Those dresses are made of lining material and thus they cling. Great for one time wear & cheap to make but they don’t even look that good on the 20 somethings. Get something between the dress and you and it will hang much better.

Get the bits that you want to emphasise like maybe boobs taken in or do it yourself since you can hide the crime under your arms of a little bit of amateur sewing.

Some amusing comments on this thread. I wouldnt wear that dress either. Surely if you're that close she'll understand and let you pick an alternative?! Then she doesn't have any additional stress?

Try a padded bra to even put your top and bottom of there's room. Of your hair is long, wear it down. Maybe a massive bridesmaid bouquet held right on front of you and something fancy on your hair to keep attention upwards.

Heels to elongate your body.

Stand half behind someone in the photos.

Your sis owes you big time.

I would seriously try it with a slip or a petticoat if sis is really on the matching vibe and a little baggy. Imagine rather than clinging, it hung off you straight, then use a shall to bring attention to your empire line or waist depending on body shape by how you stand in the photos. Then spend the rest of the wedding dancing like a mad thing and don’t worry about it. The one group shot & the couple shots is all people ever display. You’ve got this - whatever shape you are now!

www.simplybe.co.uk/shop/naturally-close-2-pack-blackblush-maxi-petticoat-slip/NP462/product/details/show.action?pdBoUid=4014&optionColour=Black/Blush&optionSize=24/26&promo=6202&cm_mmc=GOOGLE--Simplybe--na-_-PRODUCT_GROUP&utm_source=google&utm_medium=pla&ds_rl=1277134&ds_rl=1277134&gclid=Cj0KCQjwjPaCBhDkARIsAISZN7T_NplVBuFwfo1sx5NLOzB3j18HHrCSQr2tS_ul2-iJ35vwzLDUpCAaAuuSEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds

Sounds like you're going to grin and bear it. Take another outfit for the evening and stand behind people whenever a camera comes out (hard at your height I know). Have a quiet word with the photographer if you can.

Just keep reminding yourself that people rarely have their wedding pictures on display for long. Most people end up with just a shot of the B&G on display so your embarrassment should be shortlived.

Try planks?

I doubt the wedding will go ahead in September. Covid is still in charge.

Sign up to Les Mills On Demand. It's great, you can workout at home, and there's loads of challenges to follow. Maybe put a pic of the dress on the fridge so you see it every day. That's your "why" when you feel like giving up

I’ve tried loads of shapewear over the years and Spanx is definitely the best! The one that goes from under bra to knees and is super smooth under clothes and most importantly the easiest to pull and and down and generally very comfortable.

The dress is beautiful btw!

I also think that the dresses should be changed. It's not ok to let you feel like a sack of spuds all day, and I don't understand grown women who would have a meltdown about their sister not liking a dress.

Why not say to her that you and sisters will find a selection of better dresses to present to her for the final say?

Not RTFT so apologies if this has already been suggested, but if you're 5'2 can you get a standard length dress and get a dressmaker to take it up from the middle? Ie make it waisted and slightly more a-line? It won't stop it being clingy said but might make it slightly less of a nightmare?

Head transplant?

I’d recommend a really good bra line to knee Spanx or similar plus a pashmina or wrap which will give you a bit more coverage and will differentiate you from the younger bridesmaids in a good way.

The Spanx however shouldn’t be too tight - you want to be comfortable and to be able to eat and drink! All you want is something smoothing rather than trying to pull you in by inches.

Ultimately I’m sure you’ll look lovely even if it’s not your first choice of dress. Enjoy the day.

I would look awful in that and I'm not overweight.

I would ask if she minds you wearing a pashmina type thing in case you get cold then get a really big one and spend the whole day with it wrapped around me.

I agree with all PP, my BMI is 20 and i would look an absolute horror in that dress. If you really can't wear something different, get those conturve things which do look magic. A pretty wrap, one of those long chiffony scarf things could look lovely and you can wind it around clingy parts when you're socialising and eating at least, even if you can't wear it for the photos. And give yourself some very loving affirmations in the mirror beforehand so you are looking and feeling confident !
You're a kind sister to go along with this and not want to upset the bride. I hope you have a lovely day.

The fact that the wedding is in September may work in your favour as you can legitimately pretend to be wearing the shawl because you are cold.

I agree about the that dress. I am not overweight- but would hate to wear that dress. It is very unforgiving, and would accentuate lumps and bumps.

You are far nicer than I am OP, it would be a flat no from me, that style of dress looks hideous on 99.9% of people & you’re being very generous of spirit by assuming the bride doesn’t know that!

These are amazing:

www.spanx.com/shapewear/spanx-smartgrip-slips-open-bust-full

You could have an issue depending on straps etc but I have previously cut the straps and looped them so they hold the main part of the bra at the sides.

Ouch! I agree that the dress would be difficult for most who aren't thin and willowy. If the fabric were patterned it would hide better.

As it's your sister, can't you be the chief bridesmaid? Have a co-ordinating dress (but not that one), and walk in front of the other two bridesmaids?

I think that any covering, jacket or otherwise, would just look like what it is, disguise. I think it would be nicer for you if you could feel comfortable in what you're wearing on the day and that dress is going to make you feel self-conscious, even if it looks nicer than you think.

I'm confident, I like my body and all that good stuff but I would look like an amateur sausage maker's first attempt in that dress. That dress looks good on one body type, it doesn't even come down to weight or size.
I'd decline.

Your an amazing sister to be prepared to go through with wearing it, it's a harsh dress t wear unless tall, slim, toned.

Ask your sister if there can be lots of top half photos of you and her and the bridesmaids as well as full length ones!

@rainbowowl

I've attached the pics, (on the app so I hope it works) they're not the actual dress but this sort of style/colour

I think I'll need a proper full body shape thing, as the dress is fitted almost down to the knee before it gently flared? Any pant-line on the hips is very visible, If that makes sense? It really accentuates my saddlebags and hipdips. I have quite a severe csection pooch, with a lot of stretch marks, it's quite difficult to hide other than tucked into my very high waisted jeans!

Ask for a different dress. This will do you no favours.