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Original poster

Would you consider a 3rd child if you lived in a 2 bed house?

167 replies

Onedropbeat · 16/02/2021 18:00

You live in a 2 bed house. It’s fine as it is but will be a squeeze even with the two children when they grow up.
DH and I ideally wanted a 3rd. I’m late 30’s

There’s no chance of us affording anything bigger anytime soon due to the way house prices have increased in our area. We have solidly been priced out just in the last year because of people relocating but wanting to still be accessible to London

Pre Covid we thought that our salaries would continue increasing at the rate they had been and we’d be able to afford the next rung on our tiny ladder

We can’t really now. Wages have dropped rather than increasing and obviously won’t be increasing again for a long while if at all now

Would you have a much desired 3rd in the circumstances or just suck it up to Covid

OP posts:
iPhonie · 17/02/2021 14:47

No, I wouldn’t. I have a 4 bedroomed house & one of the rooms is quite small so I feel bad for my (soon to be) 3rd child.
Just being honest but I would think about them being teenagers etc

lalafafa · 17/02/2021 14:59

you need to convert the dining room to a bedroom for you.

Nettleskeins · 17/02/2021 14:59

Yes, I would have three.
I know at least three families round here with three kids in two bed flats, not even houses, and they dont regret their third child. All grownup now, everyone turned out fine. There are all sorts of reasons for happy unhappy families and overcrowding on the scale you anticipate doesnt seem to be the issue, whereas compatability of parents, other mental issues IS. One extra child hasnt tipped people in the way you might have thought. And if you have gps near by, then you have to some extent "extra space". Kids share rooms quite happily for ages.
You have nothing to lose, go for it!!

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Nettleskeins · 17/02/2021 15:05

One of mine had an absolutely tiny.box room as his bedroom, and he was very fond of it till 18.

Phoebesgift · 17/02/2021 15:06

No. My stepson moved out of our 3 bed house recently. Our preteen daughters were sharing up to that point. It was hell. They both needed their own space and privacy. I can't imagine the hell of 3 teenagers in 2 bed house.

MixedUpFiles · 17/02/2021 15:11

No.
You already lack flexibility. With 3 children you might find the physical space for the beds, but you might not be able to meet the needs of each person.

Winecurestiredness · 17/02/2021 15:13

i dont think i would. i have two DCs in a 2 bed council bungalow (due to my disability/illness) and even with the two boys being 8 and 5 we are already getting under eachothers feet when DH is back from work, it feels overwhelming and claustrophobic, seriously if i could work a good job i would just ditch council and rent a 3 bed even now just with two, certainly with 3,

Brieminewine · 17/02/2021 15:21

Nope, I wouldn’t have had a second in a two bed.

WhitechapelFatberg · 17/02/2021 15:26

maybe. if you're in an area where you can get lots more for your money elsewhere then staying put is not necessarily a permanent decision.

3 small kids in a 2 bed is doable, but 3 hulking teens will feel different. We have 2 teens in a small 2.5 bed Victorian terrace, and right now with everyone at home for a lot of the time even that feels a bit squeezed.

MacDuffsMuff · 17/02/2021 15:51

@EuroTrashed I think it's understandable that she doesn't want to move further away from her elderly parents.

EuroTrashed · 17/02/2021 16:01

a 20 minute drive can make the world of difference in housing affordability but if that's out of the question and the elderly parents take priority over a 20 minute drive, then I guess she's back at not being able to fit a third child into her existing house then, @MacDuffsMuff? Something has to give, and OP has to decide which element of the puzzle that is.
(a 20 minute drive is still nearby for the aged Ps in most people's book)

MacDuffsMuff · 17/02/2021 18:53

a 20 minute drive is still nearby for the aged Ps in most people's book

@EuroTrashed you're absolutely right, it can make all the difference. A 40 minute round trip would have been too far for me when I was calling in on my mum morning and night. For the time, distance and cost of petrol. I'm sure the OP will do the right thing for their situation.

Skyla2005 · 17/02/2021 19:12

No. Giving my advice from a mum of 3 same sex children with only 3 bed house I wouldn't do it if you can't afford to give them all their own room. We struggled and struggled to save for an extension so that they could all have their own space and it's really put a strain on us. Wasn't so much a problem when they were small but as they get older they really needed their own rooms with their own wardrobes and own things around them. So if I had the choice no I definitely wouldn't do it Please don't people jump on me saying their kids share and that's fine not everyone can afford to save for an extension etc. I know that but just saying my personal experience was I felt they needed their own space

Babymamaroon · 17/02/2021 19:45

I'm afraid I wouldn't.

A 2-bed house for me would only suffice for a couple and 1 child max.

The standard of living and quality of life will be lower if you add another child that you can't really accommodate IMO.

I need space and plenty of it - it's literally the only thing that has kept me sane whilst working FT and homeschooling!!!

But, we're all different and if you choose to go ahead I hope you make it work for you.

WatchWatch · 17/02/2021 19:52

No I wouldn't, but I absolutely hated sharing a room with my sister and despite it only being for 2 years (when my younger brother needed his own room) it did serious damage to our relationship which 25years later and 100miles between us is only just starting to recover. We both acknowledge it was because we shared a room - our personalities are so very different and not being able to escape each other was awful.

Anywherebuthere · 18/02/2021 15:45

@LonstantonSpiceMuseum

Going to go against the grain here and say yes it's perfectly possible, as long as you treat the rooma for sleep and sleep only (not a hangout) and don't have too much clutter. The own room thing is partly cultural. There are a lot of places across the world where people have managed fine sharing rooms to sleep, or bring out the beds into the living area each night time. And they are not necessarily poor. However if you value privacy and space, it might really get you down. Only you know whether that can work.
Completely agree with this
Chewingle · 18/02/2021 17:27

My two were sharing. It was ok, it wasn’t ideal but it was ok. We didn’t know different.

Then I came in to some money and spent it on an extension, which added another bedroom.

Best. Money. I. Have. Ever. Spent.

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