Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Woke up and there was no milk. I lost the plot.

363 replies

steppemum · 09/02/2021 11:34

Just that really.
Bit of a last straw moment.

Ds is 18, his gf is also living here during lockdown, they tend to come downstairs at 2 am and have meals.
Last night they had cereal, and used up all the milk.
Shopping arrived this morning at 10 am, so we just needed enough milk for my morning tea. I get up at 6:30. He usually surfaces at 10-11 am.

I was furious. I acknowledge unreasonably so. So at 8am I went up and told him to get up and go to the shop and buy milk. I might have shouted. He said no, calm down mum, it's only milk, which obviously made it much better Hmm
dd2 then got up and went ot the shop for milk, in order to restore calm!

not sure why I am posting really, just fed up of holding it all together, and the bloody selfishness of teenagers.

yes they do help around the house etc etc. as does dh.

Just -
lockdown
home schooling
no head space
no me time
no coffee with friends
bloody meals, just bloody meals and shopping, x 6 x 3 times a day (and I don't do all the cooking and they get their own breakfast etc, but still somehow it is such a production line)

rant over, thanks for listening.

OP posts:
Butterbeeeen · 09/02/2021 15:00

OP my children are not teenagers and I'm almost ashamed to admit that I actually threw a right royal sweary tantrum last week as DH and the children ate MY crumpets. I completely get it OP.

SleepingStandingUp · 09/02/2021 15:00

@Raindough

I think it was mean of you to let your daughter go to the shop for milk when you had a delivery en route - it wasn’t her fault.
Unless op adds that it's snowing ferociously and the shops are beyond the bog of eternal stench and she sold DDs last clothes to the milkan so she's had to go in pajamas and slippers, I think DD will cope and is probably glad of an excuse for air
steppemum · 09/02/2021 15:03

Oh TeeBee, you and your lovely perfect family, where everything is so calm and you have such lovely gentle conversations with your kids.

You do understand don't you that there is a mid path here?
That shouting once (or even a few times) at your kids does not make someone into the same person that your children's dad is? That you cannot judge everyone else by that standard? And that his relationship with your kids is not the model for all relationships which are noisier than yours?
You do realise that the occasional loud voice doesn't mean that you have no relationship with your kids?
That kids (especially teens) do understand the whole idea of being at the end of yout tether and that if they push, then sometimes people do get cross and shout?
And guess what, those same teens do come and talk and have deep and positive relationships with their parents.

Your black and white posts are just tiring, as they lack empathy, and lack a basic understanding of the complexities of daily life and the realities of lockdown.
You come across as sanctimonious and holier than thou.
And more to the point - how is it helpful? To anything mentioned on this thread?

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

steppemum · 09/02/2021 15:04

Unless op adds that it's snowing ferociously and the shops are beyond the bog of eternal stench and she sold DDs last clothes to the milkan so she's had to go in pajamas and slippers, I think DD will cope and is probably glad of an excuse for air

Grin Grin

to be fair, dd lives in her pjs at the moment, so she woudl happily go to the shops in her pjs if allowed.

OP posts:
CandyLeBonBon · 09/02/2021 15:08

To be fair, with teens in the house, 'beyond the big of eternal stench' is probably closer to home than you might think!!!

CandyLeBonBon · 09/02/2021 15:08

Bog not big! 🙄

Dddccc · 09/02/2021 15:11

Wow drama llama 🙄 could easy of had ot black

ArmchairTraveller · 09/02/2021 15:13

I’ve found one of the good points about the occasional snap is that not only does it make others aware that everyone matters, it also helps teens realise that it’s not the end of the world, how to repair damage and problems and how to plan ahead for next time. That one argument or rant is not The End of The World.
Different if they’ve lived with an abusive, shouty parent with a hair-trigger, TeeBee but mine haven’t.

CandyLeBonBon · 09/02/2021 15:18

@Dddccc

Wow drama llama 🙄 could easy of had ot black
Why should she?
steppemum · 09/02/2021 15:19

Black Tea is an abomination.

OP posts:
Lweji · 09/02/2021 15:20

theres just no need to eat at 2am

An 18 year old boy and his live-in girlfriend get ravenous at 2 am. Hardly shocking. Wink Grin

mam0918 · 09/02/2021 15:22

how olds you DD?
she sound sweet but Im assuming also a teen so not fair blaiming all teens.

I would have litrally kicked DS out for back answering and a lack of respect like that at his age... if you let him walk all over you like that now you'll have a 30 year old man baby living off you down the line.

THisbackwithavengeance · 09/02/2021 15:26

If I were a juror on your trial, I would not have convicted you. I would give up many things before a cup of tea with milk in the morning.

Itsjustmilk · 09/02/2021 15:26

You can guess from my user name I have been in a similar situation OP!

Lweji · 09/02/2021 15:26

I would have litrally kicked DS out for back answering and a lack of respect like that at his age...

For saying it's just milk, really?

CleverCatty · 09/02/2021 15:27

@Raindough

His girlfriend lives with you?? For an 18 year old he has a very cushy life
Yep, and especially that she can't get off her own arse and get milk that she uses too. Spoiled little madam. He's just as bad.
steppemum · 09/02/2021 15:27

and again Dddccc if you read it, you will see it was the last straw.

That was kind of the point, that in this miserable lockdown, we all have moments when we reach the end and the last straw has been cast.

of course it is only milk, and I could have gone to the shop, waited til 10, drunk something else, etc etc. On another day I might have done.

But this morning, it was the last straw.

I'm not sure why I posted, maybe just as an outlet for the build up of crap in lockdown. But actually this thread has been a lot of fun, and has served the purpose of cheering me up, so I am able to be normal unflappable Mum.
I also hope that it cheers up others with teens. (or even not yet teens) who have had their own Last Straw moments in the last few weeks.

I am done very little work today, and I do have to disappear in a minute for 2.5 hours of zoom meetings (groan).

I carry with me the picture of dd wading through deep snow over the bog of eternal stench, which has cheered me up no end.

I wish the author of a thread had the right to end it, as I think this would be a good point to say

farewell and thanks for all the fish

(now, if I coudl just get dd1 to read Douglas Adams, that would improve lock down no end...)

OP posts:
Helloandhelloagain · 09/02/2021 15:28

This would anger me. It’s actually thoughtless . I’d get angry with out all the other crap on top!

CleverCatty · 09/02/2021 15:28

@Lweji

You can still send him to get milk early in the morning every day this week. Just because.

Or send her home if it is repeated. I bet he will stop eating so much in the early morning hours.

But you may want to get more milk. Get long life and tell him to use it instead.

Long life was a game changer for my mum and I use it myself in my own home too.

But there's a question of it that runs out too. Who gets it then?

SleepingStandingUp · 09/02/2021 15:30

@steppemum

Unless op adds that it's snowing ferociously and the shops are beyond the bog of eternal stench and she sold DDs last clothes to the milkan so she's had to go in pajamas and slippers, I think DD will cope and is probably glad of an excuse for air

Grin Grin

to be fair, dd lives in her pjs at the moment, so she woudl happily go to the shops in her pjs if allowed.

Not through the bog of eternal stench tho, that ain't ever coming clean!
MrsWindass · 09/02/2021 15:30

Always have long life milk esp in these times .

marly11 · 09/02/2021 15:30

OP I can completely relate to this - with a 19 year old DS at home who spends most of the time thinking I am unreasonable. The fact that they are allowed to eat at 2am shows you have more than met them half way. I could write a long list of the reasons why having a teen of this age living at home during lock down makes my blood boil on a regular basis including constant phone calls on speaker phone disturbing my peace, a voice that carries even when he thinks he is being quiet, stomping around in the room above me late at night and waking me up, constant self absorption, eating of protein shakes for body beauty purposes and dusting the whole work surface with the powder... all small things but the sum total is big. I feel your pain. They are on the threshold of leaving home and this makes them very hard to live with - plus we can't go out for an evening to get away from it and nor can they . It seems to me that occasional but regular reminders that the line has been crossed and that it is your house and whatever unreasonable rules suit you are what unfortunately is the party line in your house. It's hard. Especially when they think they are always right.

AprilThe8th · 09/02/2021 15:31

This is one if the reasons ive trained myself to love black coffee.Noone is coming between my several morning caffeine fixes!

louiseaaa · 09/02/2021 15:31

Oh - I feel your pain and I think that no lasting harm will have been done.

My two boys are 18 and 20 - both late night snackers and we had exactly that scenario about November time. OP I also lost it. Since then, no milk has been spilled, drunk, cerealled or consumed without the effort being made to ensure there's enough left for the morning.

My 20 year old son's girlfriend is also in residence - again a pragmatic decision, covid rules related. Hard work. This too shall pass - I mutter

LizBennet · 09/02/2021 15:31

I carry with me the picture of dd wading through deep snow over the bog of eternal stench, which has cheered me up no end.

That poor wretched child Sad I hope she recovers from the trauma soon.

Swipe left for the next trending thread