Why are teachers still referred to as Mr/Mrs/Miss X?

[ChimaeraEgg]

Idle musing of the day but why do children still have to address teachers using their surnames? I assume that originally this was a respect thing and due to the fact that it was normal to address people at work or other adults as Mr/Mrs X? But I'm 32 and never in my adult life have I addressed another adult using their surname. School is the only place I have done it.

A teenager can confer respect or disrespect with one eyebrow. Using my name actually makes bugger all difference.

@ChimaeraEgg

Barrister. I’m Ms X in court and the judge is my lord / my lady / your honour etc

OK cool, see I hadn't thought of court! That was the point of my post, that I couldn't think of another situation where you'd address adults by their surnames. Was nothing to do with having a go at teachers.

Another example is the military. My DH is ex army and was sir to his men. I didn’t take your thread as teacher bashing though!

@ChimaeraEgg

I don’t have time to read the best part of 200 posts.

Then I don't have time to repeat my extensive answers on the same question. Have a nice day.

I suspect that is because you don’t like the question.

You would have a different attitude if my comments were agreeing with you

I suspect that is because you don’t like the question.

No, it's because I've already answered it.

I have no idea if you agree with me or not as the only two posts you have made are asking me what I call my doctor and that you are too busy to RTFT to see the answer to the question I had already answeres (which personally I think is a lot more disrespectful than calling someone by their first name, btw).

I really wouldn’t mind being referred to by my first name at work - it would prevent me and every other woman being called ‘miss’ while all the men get ‘sir’. That’s much more disrespectful as far as I’m concerned! Kids don’t very often use surnames at my work either (I’m convinced half of them don’t actually know most of the surnames) so it’s just - Miss. Which conveys no respect or distance!

Because young pupils constantly go 'Miss, miss, miss, miss...' now imagine the teacher was called Sarah and there was a pupil in the class called Sarah. By the end of term little Sarah would have a breakdown 😜

I have students who address me in emails as "Mrs".
Not Mrs W00t, or even Mrs W...just Mrs

And in my school, in front of pupils, probably 8/10 times I address colleagues, I will say Miss or Sir... because in the staff room I address them by their forenames, and most of the time in a classroom or corridor I can't remember their surname!
If I needed to call up the corridor to my line manager, if I used her forename she'd never respond (we have lots of pupils with her name!) but the second I bellow "Miss" she'll snap around

I don’t have time to read the best part of 200 posts

Oh @Bixs what on earth are you onnMN for then?

I can't actually recall a time I've used a health care professional's name to them or anyone else.

When I'm talking to them, there isn't much need, and if they want to know who else has seen me, I'd tell them they'll have to check as I won't be sure enough to say.

In fact, I generally get calls like: "Is this [full name]? This is the nurse practitioner at [GP's Surgery Name], can I check your date of birth..." so I have absolutely no idea what their names of who I spoke to is. I'm sure it's marked down somewhere on the records who called, but I've not the foggiest and this has happened also when people from the hospital call (I have multiple disabilities so I get a lot of these calls) - I get a job title, but rarely do I get a name when it's on a call. In text I get a name, but I wouldn't really think to use it with anyone.

I find it interesting the focus on children and formality, when as already mentioned, childcare settings often don't require this level of formality even when a young child is there for far longer than they are in school and plenty of adults don't get professional boundaries. It all seems to be social habits, it doesn't seem to actually teach anything about respect or manners.

It's respect and helps to formalise the situation. I prefer it, it's basic manners.

Good grief.
How are kids supposed to learn to respect their elders if they're running around first-naming everyone in sight?
This place makes me feel old sometimes.

I first started out volunteering in a school and I asked the children to call me by my first name. I was much more comfortable with that. They weren't, and started calling me Miss Firstname. That carried on even after I got a paid job there because by that time it was what everyone knew me as.

I now work at a university and have had emails from students greeting me with everything from Professor Lastname (I'm very much not a professor!) to just 'Hey' - and that's with me consistently signing off as Firstname.

In general I expect parity - if someone is introduced to me as Mr Smith then I'm Ms Lastname. If they're Bob then I'm Firstname.

@SusannaSpider

I have also heard teachers address parents as 'Mum'.....

This irks the hell out of me, doctors do it too.

In fairness parents don’t always have the same surname as their children for various reasons, both cultural and social, so saying Amir’s mum, or Jordan’s mum saves having to remember in a split second who doesn’t have the same surname as their child and then recalling what the name actually is ....

my sons receptionist teacher is known by her first name, I don't know if this will change when he goes in to yr 1...

Reception, ffs

In the school that I teach in all staff and parents are known by their first names.

How are kids supposed to learn to respect their elders if they're running around first-naming everyone in sight?

I mean, I should imagine by having loving and emotionally intelligent parents who they witness treating other people kindly and respectfully?

Can you explain why it is inherently disrespectful to use someone's first name?

It all seems to be social habits, it doesn't seem to actually teach anything about respect or manners.

Yes that's exactly my point. Just about adhering to random arbitrary social niceties. Not really about being a decent person.

I call my gp by his first name and he calls me by mine. He stitched me up after dd1’s birth so quite honestly I think we are beyond dr Smith and Mrs dragons. I find it so weird when teachers introduce themselves to parents as mr/Mrs. I’m a professional adult so why do I need to address my dc teacher so formally as if they’re my senior? Just feels very odd. Dd1 is secondary and her head signs parent letters with his Christian name which is far more normal to me.

I think it’s pointless

Workplaces outside armed forces etc now all first names

I think it's about brought up correctly. I was brought up to address local elders as Mr and Mrs. I know some parents are a bit lax and don't care about teaching manners and respect, but when you are children, it's just the done thing to address elders as Mr or Mrs or Miss or even Ms. It the proper way to raise children. I do find that some children and some adults (who weren't raised to address their elders properly) are stunned and don't seem to understand etiquette. However it is a matter of if you are raised properly to address your elders in the respectful manner. I am stunned that anyone would even pose the question "Why are teachers still referred to as Mr, Mrs, Miss" etc. Unfortunately those who are not raised properly struggle with proprietary. I addressed all elders as Mr/Mrs/Miss/Ms their last name, so did my daughter. That a question like this is posed, says a lot about the way society is going these days. Tbh I am shocked at such a question.

I actually don't object to teachers being addressed as Mr/Miss/Mrs etc, but I do not agree it is more respectful.

I think that's a weird concept of respect. Doesn't really tally with respect as I understand it.

My dc are respectful yet call adults they come across by the name they are introduced to them as. There’s never been an occasion outside of school when anyone requested they’re called Mrs xxx. I’d rather they focus on please and thank you to demonstrate being polite than an outdated use of Mrs / Mr that demonstrates nothing.

I'm a teacher and it's about respect and professional boundaries. Just the same as I would always call my GP Dr x. But if they call me "Mrs" anything I would put them straight into detention ha ha!! It's Miss x, thank you very much!