Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Wardrobes DH ICU

999 replies

Wardrobes123 · 19/01/2021 20:30

Just thought I’d create a new thread. To help us to keep track of what’s happened.

My DH was ventilated last week. We’ve had two calls to see him due to him being very close to death. He isn’t stable but he is still alive at the moment. All we can do is wait.

I’m not going to lie, I’m not coping at all. My mum has moved in to help me cope with daily life. We’ve spoken with the children and they know how serious it is. They are also struggling now with the youngest stepping back from schooling when she needs to.

I can’t think ahead. Just usually about the hour or two that we’re living in. It’s very surreal. And incredibly difficult. Doctors are very realistic about prognosis and survival, which is really hard to hear.

I am incredibly grateful for all the support we’ve had as a family. MN is a remarkable place at times.

@groovinpeanut - Flowers my heart goes out to you and your family and I’m so sorry for the loss of your DH, message me anytime X

@intheshadowofthemushroomcloud - Flowers for all your support and messages.

I have had several messages from other mnetters who don’t have their own threads but who are also experiencing this living hell Flowers it’s a horrible journey and we don’t know how it will end but all we can do is hope/pray for a better outcome.

I haven’t always had the energy to post, too fearful of jinxing things and generally the last few days have been very raw and intense. But I’ve read every message and I’m so grateful of the support.

OP posts:
DragonMamma · 20/01/2021 00:01

Delurking to send you strength to get through whatever the next few days or weeks brings you Wardrobes. Nobody deserves this.

wlv12 · 20/01/2021 00:03

I think of you often but don’t want to tag you wardrobes so you don’t feel overwhelmed.

We lived through this hell over Christmas, and my heart goes out to you all Flowers

LegoAndLolDolls · 20/01/2021 00:07

Really sorry to hear your update Flowers

FabbyMagic · 20/01/2021 00:10

Delurking to pass on my best wishes, don’t put too much pressure on yourself to be or act a certain way right now, just coping day by day is enough for now Flowers

LucyLockdown · 20/01/2021 00:11

I hope and pray that your DH will recover. Sending you love and strength.

briebuiltthiscity · 20/01/2021 00:16

You know what - you are coping. Simply by putting one foot in front of the other on a daily basis would be coping - and you’re doing so much more than that.

You’re support to others and your kindness in sharing your story which also helps many others is simply amazing.

I truly hope that the outcome is good for your dh - and really wish you and your family well

Hurtandupset2 · 20/01/2021 00:36

Thinking of everyone going through this atm. Hearing this really makes you hug your loved ones that bit tighter.
I pray that there are good outcomes for you all and I'm so sorry for your loss, groov

uncomfortablydumb53 · 20/01/2021 00:43

Sending you and yours love, hope and strength Thanks

Wardrobes123 · 20/01/2021 02:57

@Lovelydovey - I am so sorry to hear about your parents. It’s truly heartbreaking and really unfair X

@InTheShadowOfTheMushroomCloud - I’m forever grateful for your unwavering support. Glad Mr Mushroom is home.

I hate nighttime. The hospital called at 4am a couple of days ago to ask me to see him urgently. I am now anticipating it again. I can’t sleep for the fear of that phone call.

Plus very bad night with youngest. She was utterly inconsolable this evening. She’s usually a very stoic, hardy young thing but tonight she just burst with it all. It’s heartache on a different scale.

Oh I must say I don’t mind being tagged for those kind posters worried about it. Goes to an old email address anyway, so doesn’t ping my phone (luckily!). Plus I only use MN if I feel up to it.

Currently listening to the rain.

OP posts:
spamm · 20/01/2021 03:25

I have been following the thread. I am in the US, so I am usually on later in the day.

Along with so many others, I am hoping that your DH defies all the odds.

Peridot1 · 20/01/2021 04:10

Thanks for updating Wardrobes. I am so sorry for what you are going through.

And huge sympathies to Groovinpeanut.

And to all who are going through similar or who have done. What a time we are living in. It’s unbelievable really when you think about it. Unbelievable and heartbreaking.

lunar1 · 20/01/2021 04:14

Lots of love to you and your family 💕

Neome · 20/01/2021 04:25

Sending love 🌺❤️🌺

StealthRoast · 20/01/2021 04:34

much love to you dear op, there are a few of us up if you need anything. I hope and pray that you manage some rest and your DH has a comfortable night xx

StrugglingICUnurse · 20/01/2021 05:15

Ah Wardrobes, you and he have done well to get this far. Keep on plodding on, as PP said, one hour at a time. I'm sorry you had an emergency call in. Did you get to see him at least then?

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 20/01/2021 05:42

Ah Wardrobes - sorry to hear that he's still in a bad way but glad that he's at least still here.
Just hope that he can pull through for you all. Glad you have your mum there too. Thanks

Although Winston's Wish is primarily a website for grieving children, they do have some resources for children dealing with having a relative who is seriously ill with covid too - www.winstonswish.org/coronavirus/ - but I would totally understand if you don't want to access that at the moment.

Skipsurvey · 20/01/2021 05:44

Stay safe Flowers

Colouringaddict · 20/01/2021 06:10

God I can’t imagine how hard this is for you, but I am adding my thoughts and good wishes to the others and passing them to you

Deereamer · 20/01/2021 06:18

Sending love to you and keeping everything crossed for some positive news for your family xx

2018SoFarSoGreat · 20/01/2021 06:22

@Wardrobes123 I thought of you and your family this afternoon, when Biden finally gave us a national moment to grieve. You and @Groovinpeanut. What hell this is, how helpless and alone it makes us all. How the normal ways of coping are not available to us. It is horrid and I'm so angry and sad for you, and everyone else suffering the consequences of this disease.

Hope is not lost. Miracles do happen.

Sending so much love and strength to you. And a cuddle, because that's what I'd want to give you in life.

Neenan · 20/01/2021 06:28

💐no words x

Misspacorabanne · 20/01/2021 06:33

I'm so sorry your going through this wardrobes! Thinking of you, and hoping your DH pulls through! Keep talking if and when you need too. We're here to listen. Flowers

Nix32 · 20/01/2021 06:39

One step at a time Wardrobes. I'm so sorry you're going through this and I hope so much that there's some positive news for you. You and your family are in my thoughts.

Sceptre86 · 20/01/2021 06:49

Sending all my prayers your way. You are displaying so much courage to keep things together. My heart goes out to you x

We have been through similar with my uncle, sadly he didn't make it but gave a valiant effort having been on a been on a ventilator for 18 days.

Covidcovid · 20/01/2021 06:51

I read your other thread Wardrobes and then couldn’t find it. I’m thinking of you and really, really hoping he improves soon.