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Original poster

Zoom. They slagged me off, not realising I could hear.

103 replies

OnceIWasAnApe · 08/01/2021 14:54

Long-time poster, namechanged.

Aaaaargh.

I am self-employed and am currently working for a company as part of a team of five people. I've been working with them for a few months, and have a few months left.

We are working over zoom this week, but will be meeting face to face from next week onwards. Today, I dialled into a meeting and the rest of the group obviously didn't realise I was present. They were slagging off the work I'd done before Christmas (basically saying I am too keen and so do things too quickly before it's time.) Whilst I do see that I was more keen than the rest of them, I think that this comes more from a gossipy, bitchy, offhand sort of chat, and I don't think that they really think I'm a bad worker.

I feel HORRIBLE.

I don't know why I'm posting really.

OP posts:
EuroTrashed · 08/01/2021 14:57

slagging it off because the keeno consultant makes the staffers look slow and lazy?
or slagging off your speed and keenness because you jump the gun and tehrefore do work that's not appropriate / wrong because you've not waited for full instructions?

If the former, well who is paying you and on what basis?

if the second, use it as a very useful learning experience. It's constructive criticism not slagging off.

QuentinInQuarantino · 08/01/2021 14:58

Ohhh that's so horrible OP, and so bitchy of them. It sounds like they were jealous of your work potentially being appreciated more than theirs. If the worst thing that they can say about you is that's you're really efficient, then don't feel too bad. Did they realise you were there eventually?

ShirleyPhallus · 08/01/2021 14:59

Did you say anything? I’d have made it clear I was on the call and said that you thought it was a good thing to be keen and get things done quickly

Backstabbing twats

Also my worst nightmare, talking about someone on a call and them being on!

Original poster
OnceIWasAnApe · 08/01/2021 15:00

It's difficult to know Euro, my actual employers seem happy with my work and I get excellent feedback. But I also have a responsibility to fit in with the staff, and maybe I was a bit over-keen to prove myself and jumped the gun a bit.

This sounds pathetic, but I was a bit gutted at the giggly tone used by them- It felt like being at school.

OP posts:
OrigamiOwl · 08/01/2021 15:03

Do they know that you heard them?

Lockdownlovernotfromliverpool · 08/01/2021 15:05

Well now you know.... They can firmly stay in the work colleague zone.... Plenty of people mistake work mates for real mates. Now you won't be drawn into birthday /wedding /such like cash collections and fake interest /concerns conversations... Win bloody win op.

Original poster
OnceIWasAnApe · 08/01/2021 15:08

I didn't let on, although I was quiet. I know I'm not a perfect worker and I will defo take their comments on board- But I do wish that, given they have an issue with me, they would have told me face to face.
(In my heart of hearts, I don't think they DO have an issue with me. I really do feel that it was just giggly gossip.)

OP posts:
DaphneBridgerton · 08/01/2021 15:10

It's quite astonishing what we will say about people when we don't think they can hear us... I would try to remember that people have a habit of exaggerating and becoming bitchy in these type of group conversations. But of course try to be honest with yourself about whether you can adjust your approach slightly to be more "likeable" or whatever.
Having said all of that... this sounds like a horrible and hurtful experience and I'm sorry you heard it Flowers

MooseBeTimeForSummer · 08/01/2021 15:11

I’d say something at the start of the next meeting.

ThePlantsitter · 08/01/2021 15:13

As long as your work is fine they are not understanding that as a self employed person you can't afford to 'coast' like maybe they do. Are you sure you didn't make mistakes because you rushed? If you are, just forget about it. They have no empathy.

I think you might want to send a general email telling people to watch what they say on Zoom meetings. Then they can sweat, knowing what they said. Honestly I think they must be a bit thick as well as lacking empathy to have that conversation during a meeting you were about to join. Hmm.

Gliblet · 08/01/2021 15:16

If it's any consolation they're going to feel at least as bad once they find out - and if I were their manager, I would definitely want to know they'd been thick enough to have a behind the back conversation about someone who had access to that meeting. It's such a basic, basic element of professionalism.

You could always approach it 100% openly/without guile - have a quiet chat with one of them, tell them what happened and before they can get into the pointless shame denials, ask if there's anything you can do differently to help the team feel that you're working with them, not competing with them (or whatever you think the most appropriate wording would be).

Medievalist · 08/01/2021 15:19

I don't know how they couldn't know you were there. Even if you turn your video and audio off, if you're logged into Zoom then you are still 'present' on screen. Unless it was just a telephone number or email address that showed up?

I wouldn't have been able to resist making my presence felt. And in your shoes I'd probably be sending round a PA email 'apologising' for working so hard ...

IntermittentParps · 08/01/2021 15:25

They sound horrible, and probably insecure because you got the work done in decent time (as self-employed people tend to) and it shows them up.
Fuck em.

Original poster
OnceIWasAnApe · 08/01/2021 15:29

I'm not 100% that I made zero mistakes, and I can never be 100% about the value and standard of my work either (creative industries so it's all a matter of opinion.) As I said, I am definitely going to consider it as a potential lesson, and that maybe I can do things differently from now on. But ugh. I can not un-hear those tones of voice!

OP posts:
EuroTrashed · 08/01/2021 15:29

Sounds like you're showing them up by your keenness. Take pre-emptive action and email your actual employer and ask for their feedback now.

As for them - at least you know what they're like without wasting more time on them.

katy1213 · 08/01/2021 15:31

They could have been saying a lot worse about you!

ThePlantsitter · 08/01/2021 15:31

They sound horrid. You need to repeat exactly a phrase that was said in the bitch session.

Otherwise I can go run and beat them up for you if you like OP? Flowers

GloGirl · 08/01/2021 15:32

@EuroTrashed

Sounds like you're showing them up by your keenness. Take pre-emptive action and email your actual employer and ask for their feedback now.

As for them - at least you know what they're like without wasting more time on them.

Agreed.

They sound really horrible and I refuse to take feedback from people talking snidely about people - it's not constructive so even if it is true I would carry on regardless. And ignore them.

I think anyone laughing about how someone "likes to work" is a lazy bum and would be treated accordingly.

ThePlantsitter · 08/01/2021 15:32

@ThePlantsitter

They sound horrid. You need to repeat exactly a phrase that was said in the bitch session.

Otherwise I can go run and beat them up for you if you like OP? Flowers

I mean repeat the phrase to them, not on here (unless you want) by the way.
Vitaminsss · 08/01/2021 15:33

Well, do you need the money or not?

If you don’t need the money, refuse to continue working with them or confront them

If you need the money, just bite your tongue until it’s over. As a contractor you have little employment rights so they may get rid of you regardless if you confront them

Original poster
OnceIWasAnApe · 08/01/2021 15:33

I don't know how they couldn't know you were there. Even if you turn your video and audio off, if you're logged into Zoom then you are still 'present' on screen.
There is this too... They 100% would not have said a word if they thought that there was any chance of my hearing them, but surely in any professional environment, people should know how these things work?! I can believe that they wouldn't understand the technology, but it annoys me that them being careless enough to allow me to hear what I heard is far, far more unprofessional than anything I've ever done.

OP posts:
lightyearsahead · 08/01/2021 15:34

You need to let it go, they probably didn't mean it and probably felt threatened by your efficiency. Just concern yourself with who pays your wages.

Many years ago, I was told by my boss to stop volunteering for stuff because I was making other people feel bad and they thought I was making out they couldn't do their job - he was a lawyer and I am not so pretty silly really.

Mummyoflittledragon · 08/01/2021 15:35

If your work was of a good standard, they sound jealous, intimidated and / or feel inadequate. It sounds like perhaps they don’t understand how you work, maybe they have to do other work, not just the project you’re collaborating on and therefore can’t produce work as quickly as them. Or they’re lazy. Either way, take it as a compliment. You’re working freelance because you’re a valuable asset.

BottleFlipper · 08/01/2021 15:37

I'd tell them you've heard there's been comments made about your performance on a Zoom call then let them suspect each other of being the leak...

Original poster
OnceIWasAnApe · 08/01/2021 15:37

Well, do you need the money or not?
I could survive without it, but I'm not going to leave my employer in the lurch- I'm going to bite my tongue and be fucking ace and professional and do my fucking job.

You need to repeat exactly a phrase that was said in the bitch session. This is an excellent idea. I am absolutely going to do this.

OP posts:
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