Zoom. They slagged me off, not realising I could hear.

[OnceIWasAnApe]

Long-time poster, namechanged.


Aaaaargh.

I am self-employed and am currently working for a company as part of a team of five people. I've been working with them for a few months, and have a few months left.

We are working over zoom this week, but will be meeting face to face from next week onwards. Today, I dialled into a meeting and the rest of the group obviously didn't realise I was present. They were slagging off the work I'd done before Christmas (basically saying I am too keen and so do things too quickly before it's time.) Whilst I do see that I was more keen than the rest of them, I think that this comes more from a gossipy, bitchy, offhand sort of chat, and I don't think that they really think I'm a bad worker.

I feel HORRIBLE.

I don't know why I'm posting really.

[WombatChocolate]

I think you have to care a bit less about what people think of you, to be honest. Grow a slightly thicker skin and don’t be so bothered by the inevitable bitchiness that is out there, unless it is really serious.

Don’t give it headspace. Don’t assess your own performance based on what they said...they probably bitch a bit about lots of people. Don’t be overly upset or drop hints to show you heard what they said....that is taking far more notice of it and giving more reaction than it deserves. Just move on. Don’t allow yourself to wallow in self pity about it or indignation about their behaviour. It’s not nice, but lots of not nice things happen that we just have to live with, rather than being outraged or reacting and demanding recompense to each one. Just move on.

And all those fuelling the Op’s upset and saying she should complain or seek revenge, I suspect they haven’t had seriously senior roles in the workplace or big complicated issues to deal with....these kind of petty little behaviours honestly cease to seem important or take up more than a few minutes thought, when you’re having to deal with much bigger workplace issues and to be thicker skinned. It’s not a nice thing to happen...but these things do happen. Little is gained by dropping hints to show you heard or seeking little revenges, apart from you hurt yourself by dwelling on it and becoming bitter.

[MintyMabel]

maybe I was a bit over-keen to prove myself and jumped the gun a bit.

No employer will expect you to take longer than is necessary to do a job because they want you to fit in with the team.

I was in a similar situation with a Local Authority team I was seconded to. They were all bent out of shape because I didn’t join in with chats (they spent all day chatting) and I didn’t leave bang on 5pm. (They often left early) I also met all my deadlines and they didn’t like that either. When I was hauled in to my bosses office to talk to him about it, I fed back my side of the story. The boss of the LA team got the feedback and thanked us for drawing attention to the slacking.

[MarieIVanArkleStinks]

Are you called Lucy?

Very witty!

[grassisjeweled]

Are you called Lucy?

[MeridianB]

Just wanted to offer a handhold, OP.

This is horrible. Nasty juvenile playground behaviour which is a trigger for around 99% of the population.

But it sounds like you are delivering professionally and their views don’t count. Thank your lucky stars they are not permanent colleagues.

Be kind to yourself and try to let it let it go.

[OnceIWasAnApe]

Thanks all. You're making me feel so much better! If anything, it's made me focus on the work I'll be doing after this job. Horrible lesson re. two-faced people, but nonetheless, lesson learned!

[TatianaBis]

They weren’t really bitching about you - they didn’t say you smell and bore the pants off them - they were bitching about your fast work ethic which makes them look bad.

Try not to take what other people say personally.

[1dayatatime]

Slagged off because "you are too keen and do things quickly " .

I'd take it as a compliment from a bunch of useless lazy tossers

[LadyJaye]

I was a contractor and latterly a subject matter expert consultant for the better part of a decade.

The first rule of contracting is that the people you work with are not your friends - they're barely even your colleagues. In a few months' time, you'll struggle to remember their names.

As long as your main stakeholder/client is happy with your work and your invoices are paid on time, that's all that matters.

[MarieIVanArkleStinks]

The last thing you should do is be conciliatory and toady up to people who have behaved totally unprofessionally in front of you asking them how you should do better or behave in a manner which better suits them.

Fuck. That.

You don't get the respect for that as a general rule. Conversely, people are likely to despise you a bit or see you as something of a pushover. A basic tent of dealing with immature toddlers is not to reward their behaviour; people behaving unprofessionally in the workplace are no different. I've learned this lesson through long experience.

Dignified silence and rise above it. Just keep it in mind and behave accordingly. They are colleagues, nothing more.

[Miramour]

All of those posts suggesting the OP has received "useful feedback" are inappropriate and plain mean.

The OP's colleagues are deeply unprofessional and breathtakingly rude.

OP. has been professional and has nothing to "learn" except that she needs to move to a more professional work environment.

Horrible thing to happen. Sorry OP. None of it your doing, they sound pathetic.

[Whatwouldnanado]

Stop beating yourself up! You have had good feed back and no complaints for the people at the top who pay you, that's all that really matters. Say nothing. Sounds as though you were showing the staffers up.

[YouokHun]

You’re probably being discussed as “a bit keen” because someone in authority has been positive about your input. As others have said, if you want to discuss it at all as part of a professional discussion then talk to the organ grinder/whoever selected you not these people. They are just having a bitch to bolster themselves in some way, probably because your keenness has highlighted something they’d rather it hadn’t!

[ddl1]

Unless they're saying that you do things in too rushed a way (and it doesn't sound like that), it sounds like a compliment: that you're more efficient than the rest - and that annoys them because it shows up that they aren't!

[ScrapThatThen]

Take it as a compliment - you are on a better level than them and you would be shown the door if you weren't keen, you are in a different position to them but the people who hire you don't hire you to be one of the gang but effective. You are clearly acing it.

[caspersmagicaljourney]

OP I would regard as a compliment actually,😎
Why make their problem yours?

[caringcarer]

I once worked as a supply teacher and taught an A level group. I had loads of resources as I had taught the same specification for years. The teacher was off with stress for about 3 months. When we were told she was to return to work on X date I told students I would be with them for 1 more week. Several said they would prefer me to stay and one cried. She said the normal teacher was so stressed she got angry with them all of the time and did not mark their essays with feed back for improvement. 3 students asked me if I would tutor them at home as they did not feel confident their teacher would move them on ahead of exam. I felt really bad for teacher. Then about 3 weeks later Head rang me and asked if I would go back again as teacher off from work again. I carried on until end of academic year. If an employee is weak for some reason a normal person working hard,doing their best, will look wonderful in comparison.

[Dailyhandtowelwash]

That sounds a real shame, OP. Obviously you heard the tone, but I can imagine saying something like that about a colleague I liked and admired in a very tongue in cheek way, or as a joke against myself, as a PP has said. Any chance that's what it was?

I agree that letting it go is the best approach, given your situation as a contractor. It must feel horrid though.

I have a couple of colleagues who are quite frankly shit at their jobs, and shouldn't be in them, but they are. They are notoriously poor and the subject of much resentment/anger as others end up doing their work. They both hate me because I've shown them up in the past, but they are incredibly matey to my face. They don't realise that I think they're both patronising knobs and I know what they've said about me behind my back. One of them slagged another colleague off in the wrong Teams chat a few weeks ago, which she and many other people saw. He bought her an extremely expensive bottle of wine to apologise, but then she's senior to him. He was lucky not to be in more trouble. If you end up in an environment where competency is seen as a betrayal of others, best to know you can move on soon I think.

[ThePlantsitter]

Honestly they probably all like you individually OP, or most of them do. Bitching is (sadly) used as a bonding thing for the ones not being bitched about isn't it. If they really hated you they'd be much more careful to keep what they were saying secret. As it is, 'too keen' is not all that bad is it?

[AliceinBunniland]

if the second, use it as a very useful learning experience. It's constructive criticism not slagging off.

It's not constructive criticism if they were saying it behind OP's back or thought she couldn't hear

[TillyTopper]

Ignore them, they sound bitchy. Just do you best to deliver and keep going. They don't actually mean anything to you and you don't need their approval - unless one of them is the boss in which case they are very unprofessional. Go in next week with your head held high!

[GingerNorthernLass]

Rise above it. You know where you stand with them all.

How do you fit in with these staff? Are they equal to you? What is their work like? Does it take them forever to get anything done? Is there work sub-standard?

I worked for a company who had lots of permanent staff who had been there a long time (lifers!). They also had a lot of contractors. The contractors outstripped the employees in terms of time/quality of work. They literally just got on with it without faffing.

It doesn't sound like you have too long to go. Stick with it. You don't have to renew or work there again.

[GetTheDebtGoneIn2021]

use it.. you have the upper hand... you need to be confident.. they were being unprofessional... tell them you have bad news.... type the script of the conversation if you had recorded it... and use it!!!! knowledge is power

WTAF?! She is self employed - not a bit player in a daytime soap! That would look completely unprofessional!

It does come across a little like that classic interview cringe - 'My only fault is being a perfectionist'. If you are being keen in a way that is showing other people up - is there a possibility you seem a bit up yourself, and they were bringing you down a peg or two?