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Original poster

5 year olds reaction to present, what do you think?

128 replies

Icantrememebrtheartist · 25/12/2020 14:37

My DD has been so excited about Christmas, she’s 5.

She wrote her wish list for Santa about a month ago and we bought several things she wanted plus some surprises that we thought she would like.

She opened her presents and told us she didn’t get anything she wanted and hates all her presents.

At school they did an activity called ‘what’s in Santa’s sack?’ and they were given pages of toys to cut out and stick (think Argos/Smyths catalogue) since then she told us she knew what she was getting for Christmas because she did her list at school! 3 pages of toys for that activity!! There was a bike, karaoke machine, gadgets, expensive LOL camper van, barbie stuff etc, about £600 worth of toys!! Obviously we explained that wasn’t her list but she insisted it was so we explained she wouldn’t get all that stuff.

She wanted an arts and crafts set, she got one, but apparently it wasn’t as big as the one she wanted, she wanted make up (we bought a little age appropriate set) it wasn’t as good as the one she wanted,

I’m so shocked at how ungrateful she’s been I feel really upset. I’m upset she’s so disappointed. And really annoyed at the bloody school activity.

Is this behaviour/attitude normal at 5?

OP posts:

christinarossetti19 · 25/12/2020 14:41

It's completely normal. The build up to Christmas, even this subdued year, is Too Much for little ones.

Just let her settle down into the day and play with what she does have.

Tickly · 25/12/2020 14:41

Oh dear. I'm sorry this has happened. The school really should have had more sensible presents in the list perhaps alongside and combined it with an activity teaching kids about how they need to choose sometimes one big gift, about gratefulness and by the sounds of it, privilege. That said, I don't think it's unusual behavioir for a 5 year old. All you can do is continue to explain as you have already and encourage her to enjoy what she's been given. She will get over it. I guess you could always suggest giving away things she doesn't want to children who don't have as much and see if that changes things....

PoppyOppy · 25/12/2020 14:43

Yes. She's overwhelmed. Such a big build-up at school (and that activity was just sitting up and begging to disappoint a child) so ignore it and she’ll come to love what she got.

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Shinyletsbebadguys · 25/12/2020 14:43

It's honestly a normal phase. Ds2 was ungrateful about a single toy and DP and I just commented we remembered ds2 doing it at the same age. I stopped present opening and told them to take a break. I had a conversation with ds2 about gratitude but in all honestly it's an age thing.

If it's any consolation ds1 did it once and has never done it since.

Don't stress too much unless it's part of a bigger picture.

cansu · 25/12/2020 14:44

The school activity is a red herring. I used to sit with the argos book when I was a kid and I still never behaved like that. You need to just be calm and matter of fact. I would tell her that she is very lucky to get these nice presents from Father Christmas.

Shinyletsbebadguys · 25/12/2020 14:44

Sorry commented we remembered ds1 doing it at the same age

KnitsAndGiggles · 25/12/2020 14:45

Is she normally like this? At 5 I'd be cutting her some slack - everything in the lead up to Christmas is geared up to them wanting everything they lay their eyes on, she will have been excited, overwhelmed, and 5 year olds don't really know how to deal with that. Her expectations have been set by the school - it's not her fault really.

I would say to her that she might be disappointed but she shouldn't say she hates them, santa got things he thought she would like to play with and the list is to give Santa ideas of what to bring her, then sit down and play with some of her new toys with her.

She's only 5. It's not her fault.

KnitsAndGiggles · 25/12/2020 14:47

I can't see how threatening to give her new toys away in the heat of the moment is really going to help either

Didiusfalco · 25/12/2020 14:48

Don’t take it to heart. It’s not you or the school, it’s an over excited child being 5. With stuff that I know is nothing to do with anything I’ve done I tend just to be matter of fact and not join in with the emotions.

Original poster

Icantrememebrtheartist · 25/12/2020 14:49

Thank you so much everyone you’ve made me feel better about it.

She was so thrilled with all her presents last year including any surprises and this year has been so different. I guess I was expecting the same reaction.

I’ve explained again about the activity at school and how Father Christmas can’t give you everything and how lucky you are to have so many lovely presents.

I hope it’s an age thing, I’d hate for her to stay so ungrateful.

OP posts:

AldiAisleofCrap · 25/12/2020 14:49

No she isn’t ungrateful she is five , just smile and say oh well these are lovely presents and play a game or watch a movie together.

Original poster

Icantrememebrtheartist · 25/12/2020 14:51

She does seem to have ‘warmed’ to some of her presents now. Parenting! so bloody hard! 😊

OP posts:

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 25/12/2020 14:53

Yeah, 5 Honestly, it could have been a real live unicorn and it would still be crap. Merry Christmas!

Noti23 · 25/12/2020 14:55

I don’t think that behaviour is normal. I just think being spoilt is becoming normalised.

maverickallthetime · 25/12/2020 14:57

I think it's worth having a stocking from FC and you get the main presents, that way it makes things a bit more even and they also learn you can't put expensive things on and expect to get them!

TokyoSushi · 25/12/2020 14:58

Mine are 7 & 9, this is the first year that nobody's been difficult, but it's still only 3pm!

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 25/12/2020 14:58

@Noti23 it's been an exceptionally tough year for kids. Be nice, eh?

Deathraystare · 25/12/2020 15:01

Yeah one of my nephews threw down a book I had bought him and said "not another boring book"! It became his favourite... I decided to hold my tongue (for once) when I really wanted to shot that I would give it to someone who deserved it, not a spoilt child but his mum is extremely over protective and it would have caused a row. I have always been complimented on getting good books for kids!

Em8725 · 25/12/2020 15:05

My daughter is the same. She had a bit of a cry that her presents weren’t as large as her baby brothers. Baby toys are bigger/cheaper. I explained this whilst we had a bit of a break from presents and now she’s happy as anything playing with everything she got.

I thought it was ungrateful but I think it’s just overwhelming. DD is 5.

Kez200 · 25/12/2020 15:07

Unusual behaviour is perfectly normal for a little one. They should not have done that activity at school. Some parents will struggle to put food on the table this year, forget buying up Argos.

My daughter when young (older than yours) found Christmas at one set of Grandparents overwhelming because they literally opened everything in one great mess. It confused her. She would take the present handed to her and put in a pile refusing to open them. They thought her rude, but it was a coping strategy.

TheSunIs · 25/12/2020 15:07

What a horribly materialistic activity for the school to do.
If my 5 year old did that, I'd tell her it was okay, she can help me pack it all up to go to the charity shop so all this stuff she doesn't want isn't in the way.

Kimakima · 25/12/2020 15:08

So many ungrateful kids.

Rainydayss · 25/12/2020 15:10

I remember my DD at that age, she was desperate for a Build a Bear My Little Pony. She opened it, picked it out the box, rolled her eyes and chucked it across the room!
Thankfully she reset herself and was better later on, think it's overwhelming and the school hasn't helped.
Hopefully this afternoon she settles and you can relax

Pomegranatemolasses · 25/12/2020 15:13

Op that was a ridiculous activity for the school to do, and your little girl is just overwhelmed by Christmas! It will all be fine.

lilmishap · 25/12/2020 15:14

My 5 yr old cried his eyes out this morning and told me ALL the other children had presents they liked and I'm not a good Mum

I slipped off for a cry in the loo

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