Page 2 | Could you marry for money ?

madcatladyforever · 19/12/2020 13:32

I have my own home or money but yes I would. It won't happen though, they all like glamorous women with long legs and blond hair.

2bazookas · 19/12/2020 13:37

No, I 've never sold my body for money. Not even just a stand up quickie, let alone a longterm contract

Viviennemary · 19/12/2020 13:38

Depends how much

is2020over · 19/12/2020 13:40

I didn't but I married because he was very hardworking (which has paid off now) and we loved each other and got on very well. What I can't marry is someone who has no motivation or any aspirations. I have friends who have married rich which seem content even though sometimes they are financially controlled by their in laws as the husband is only rich because of his parents but I have other friends who have married for love only but their husbands were typical cocklodgers sponging off my friends and my friends parents. The friends that married rich are still married, the friends that married for love (looks) most of them are divorced. If I marry again (I hope not), I will still go for the hardworking one or a rich one lol but rich because he works in a good job not because of his parents.

cactusisblooming · 19/12/2020 13:40

Yes definitely, as I get older I am craving more security than love I have no pension. Obviously on the premise that he was a fairly nice person though.

LindaEllen · 19/12/2020 13:41

I couldn't live with someone I disliked for money as I wouldn't want to be miserable, however I think if the lifestyle is good you can put up with some things that you perhaps wouldn't otherwise.

Me and DP are both broke after this year so there's no way anyone can say I'm with him for his money, haha.

Morana23 · 19/12/2020 13:42

Nope. I met my now husband when he was working a minimum wage job at a warehouse. He now works for a scaffolding firm, it's a decent job but not amazing. I fell in love with him, head over heels and what he earned meant nothing to me. He is a kind, caring funny person who I fancy the pants off, I see our financial situation as something to navigate between us as a couple, we share everything even though he earns more than me and it's always been like that. One of my close family members is married to someone with a lot of money, and honestly he is so so tight she has to ask for money and everything is divided. We have been skint on more than one occasion but I'd rather work through that with someone I love, than spend my life tolerating someone just so I can be financially secure.

nevereverplease · 19/12/2020 13:44

@DillonPanthersTexas I earn six figures . Not being goady but I don't NEED support from anyone and that's the point. If you read the post my point is - relying on someone for money isn't the same as marrying someone who happens to be rich/well off.

I've seen many marriages fall apart because of resentment of one earning significantly more than the other and the lower earner not pulling their weight. I think it can become problematic in many cases.

So I guess what I'm saying is dismissing the financially stability of who you are marrying IMO is naive. That doesn't mean I'm marrying for money.

AgeLikeWine · 19/12/2020 13:44

Absolutely not.

I would never, ever want to be financially dependent on another person. I am perfectly capable of earning a good living myself, and I can’t imagine not doing so.

nevereverplease · 19/12/2020 13:46

Also someone mentioned even though their partner wasn't financially stable they had motivation and drive, in which case I'd absolutely marry someone like that. It isn't black or white situation.

But if you're broke, lack ambition and Motivation and drive then personally, those qualities are not attractive to me.

OublietteBravo · 19/12/2020 13:47

@DailyPotion

It will be an unpopular view but I think most people marry for money to some extent. They'll all say they loved him but his earning power/career prospects will have been part of the attraction.

My MIL is absolutely convinced that I’m a gold digger. But I earn twice the amount DH does (or rather did as he’s just been made redundant), so I’m obviously not a very successful one . I could comfortably afford my lifestyle without him, although the converse isn’t true.

I think it’s easier to make your own money than to marry money. (I’m not saying it is easy to do this - just easier).

Userzzz · 19/12/2020 13:48

Depends how much money, but yes.

nevereverplease · 19/12/2020 13:50

@Userzzz love your honesty 😂

Iamthewombat · 19/12/2020 13:55

I read once that “if you marry for money, you earn every penny”.

The variant I’ve heard is, marry for money and pay for it every day of your life.

I assume that the OP’s question is, would you marry ONLY for money. To which the sensible response would be “no”. That’s a world away from meeting somebody, really liking them and discovering that he is rich, which would be a bonus!

Zenithbear · 19/12/2020 13:57

No always worked, paid my way and am wealthy in my own right.

thedevilinablackdress · 19/12/2020 13:59

Was literally just talking about Jerry Hall...

Also LOL at the idea that marriage was 'traditionally' about love. Marriage is a contract.

Atrixie · 19/12/2020 14:01

I wouldn’t marry for money but I would want someone of at least a similar income to me. I wouldn’t want to compromise on the standard of living I have or the things I like to do because a partner couldn’t afford to do them. That wouldn’t make me happy.

DillonPanthersTexas · 19/12/2020 14:03

How much money?grin lol

£12.53 and a sticky bun

Regularsizedrudy · 19/12/2020 14:04

No. I don’t want the only thing between me and poverty to be a man.

2bazookas · 19/12/2020 14:04

@nevereverplease

I think to some extent and many people do this - though they wouldn't admit.

I don't see the issue, I actually think smart move - would I rather marry a millionaire that I was averagely attracted to or a bin man I fancied the pants off - sorry but millionaire all day long. However - I am more about personality so I wouldn't compromise on that money or not.

Life is hard, and having someone able to provide a good standard of living is something to value.

HOWEVER would I ever rely on a man with money? Never in a million years. There's a difference between marrying for money and being reliant on marrying for money. If you're the latter then that's an issue IMO.

I DID marry a binman I fancied the pants off. In fact I'd already had his pants off. Lots. I never even thought twice about his future earning capacity because I was totally confident in my own.

ginislife · 19/12/2020 14:05

I would now but there would still need to be an element of fancying them/thinking they were good looking. I couldn't be with someone who didn't look after themselves. I've had 30 years of being self supporting and I'm sick of it. I'd like someone to look after me now. And yes that probably means I'm shallow but I don't care

IJustWantSomeBees · 19/12/2020 14:11

HOWEVER would I ever rely on a man with money? Never in a million years. There's a difference between marrying for money and being reliant on marrying for money. If you're the latter then that's an issue IMO.

This. It is natural to want to couple with someone who can offer you a good quality of life and that, in this society, is largely based around money. Especially if you want children, there is nothing wrong with wanting them to have a father who will be able to provide for them. I think this hatred of women wanting to marry someone who is financially secure comes from the sexist trope of women being 'gold diggers', which was started by men in an attempt to get women to lower their (already shockingly low) standards and not expect anything from men at all. However, as a woman it is never wise to put yourself in a position where you do not have access to your own money and your own source of income. Look at all the financial abuse threads on here to see why.

Iamthewombat · 19/12/2020 14:11

Was literally just talking about Jerry Hall...

She’s an interesting case. She gets much more than money out of her marriage to Rupert Murdoch. She gets to host fabulous parties, she gets to spend time with interesting people, she gets to stay relatively current. I bet she isn’t required to sleep with him either! Sounds like a good deal. She might enjoy his company too, who knows?

IJustWantSomeBees · 19/12/2020 14:14

@ginislife you're not shallow, I hope you find it!

ChristmasTreeFairy5000 · 19/12/2020 14:17

@happymummy12345

No because I'm not a goldgigger and would only marry for love. I believe in the tradition meaning of marriage that it is about love, not a contract or security if anything was to happen. I hate that view of marrying for financial protection or security. You should marry for love only. I was a student and my husband was on minimum wage when we got married. Now I'm a SAHM and he earns just above minimum wage. So it was never about money. We both knew we'd probably never have a lot, but we have each other and that is what matters most and is most important to us

Your opinion of marriage is NOT the traditional definition of marriage.

Marriage was largely a legal and financial agreement between two families. Love had nothing to do with it.