would you be annoyed if a new person at work did this

[durdur]

I have started a new FT job. DH became redundant just after I got this job which now means I have to do the school run and dh used to work completely remote from home anyway so this was never an issue for us.

So I've asked to reduce my hours to fit in with school times.
I have only been there a few weeks. Would they refuse? I would leave if they did as we need one of us to do the drop off and pick ups.

I honestly feel bad for asking to reduce my hours.

Why is this seemingly so wrong to so many people? PP seem genuinely offended at the thought of someone asking for flexibility. Don't you want to work for employers who see you as more than just another resource? Don't you want to be managers whose teams know that you care about them as people and understand that there are many more aspects to their lives than their job? Can't we move towards a work culture that would genuinely make everyone's lives a little better and easier, one that is more of a partnership involving mutual respect than a weirdly balanced relationship where someone daring to ask for reduced hours to fit in with their family life isn't seen as a terrible offence? If op's employer genuinely can't offer what she wants, fine, but why are we all so accepting of a culture where it is wrong to ask?

You need a childminder to do pick up's. It is the only way I managed to work a full day. They do drop offs and pick ups.

Is breakfast club at school an option ?

Unless he earns more than you why did your DH accept a job that meant he couldn't do the school run?

unmarkedbythat Becaus why is it the OP’S workplace who has to be flexible? She and her husband knew her working hours when he took his job and are expecting her workplace to now be “flexible”

And I say that as someone in a flexible work plan but H still has to pull his weight, and he does without complaint, and we pay wrap around.

Does the company do flexible working? I’m trying to think with the current guidelines what work means you couldn’t wfh as most companies are doing this, and being very flexible with staff to accommodate childcare etc
All you can do it ask they can only say no but if you go them with a plan of what you need they can see how it works for them. Could you not work from home after the school pick ups to make up the hours (depending on dcs age)

I hear this a lot, 'my spouse is the higher earner so more stuff falls to me'. It doesn't really make sense. Your employer doesn't care what your husband earns, they pay you to do a job. The childcare is the responsibility of both parents if both work, regardless of who makes what.

How old are the kids? Me and DH have had to work throughout and work hours are work hours. Just establish decent childcare. I have a childminder that takes the kids to school on the days I can't and then picks them up from school.
Yes it's an expense but it's worth it against what I earn.
Surely that's the most logical answer? Childcare so you can work.

I work local and dh has a commute and he is the higher earner so makes sense for him to not reduce his hours.

No, not really.

Your jobs are both important. It's also just as much his responsibility and it spreads the employer load. You could even argue that a higher earner is harder to replace effectively than a low earner job which they might be fine with simply hiring and firing.

As an an employer I’d be annoyed at going through an interview process to offer a full time position, offer then weeks later the new person wants to change their contract. If this were the other way around there would be uproar and peoples rights thrown around
I’m all for a flexible workforce but the flexibility has to work for both parties

@Nicknacky

unmarkedbythat Becaus why is it the OP’S workplace who has to be flexible? She and her husband knew her working hours when he took his job and are expecting her workplace to now be “flexible”

And I say that as someone in a flexible work plan but H still has to pull his weight, and he does without complaint, and we pay wrap around.

Yep, that's the attitude I mean.

Unfortunately employers can pick and choose at the moment.

At the moment? Can't they always?

unmarkedbythat What do you mean, what attitude?

I missed the bit about WFH a few hours each day when presumably for whatever reason others are in the office.

To be honest I would be annoyed. If I were your manager, I'd be suspecting that this alleged new job of your partner isn't so new after all and you pulled a bait and switch to get the job.

Pay for childcare like everyone else.

Asking for temporary change of hours (a few weeks) to get soemthign sorted would be fine but anymore that that, nope.

You both need to do drop off same pick up or find wraparound care. As an employer I would not be happy to be asked to reduce hours when someone has just started work, knowing what the contracted hours for obtaining the job are.

Whilst they may have to consider your request what would you do if they said no?

Why are people so up in arms about this?! OP has asked and they can always say no. What on earth is the point of struggling to get a Childminder before even asking about an easier option? Also you have no idea what OP does- it may make no difference to her co-workers whether she works from home or not. The company may welcome the money saving of her dropping a few hours or be able to offer them to someone else.

For what it’s worth at my work it would be absolutely fine. The flexibility of being able to drop my children off at school, go to their school plays etc and making up the time later is one of the reasons I’ve stayed so long.

@durdur

Is there any nurseries near you with a breakfast club?

I think that I would be angry in a such case

Talk to both of your new employers. Perhaps one of you could start later and the other finishes earlier?

I wouldn't be annoyed at all, the world is changing at a fast-pace right now and people are being made redundant all over the place and that will result in new jobs that could have different working styles/hours. Families and workplaces will need to adapt.

You could potentially be making a new position for another member of staff by reducing your hours, and someone could be very grateful for that.

Don't worry too much, just have the conversation as soon as possible.

I think your employer will decline and prepare for you to leave/recruitment to start again.

I think your DH needs to step up and ask for some flexibility as well. If he has a more senior job, he will have more negotiating power. You will never get to earn more if you dick employers about - I not your DH doesn't want to.

If you split the load between you, both requests become a lot more reasonable - either a late start on an early finish that can be made up at either end of the day.

@YoniAndGuy

I work local and dh has a commute and he is the higher earner so makes sense for him to not reduce his hours.

No, not really.

Your jobs are both important. It's also just as much his responsibility and it spreads the employer load. You could even argue that a higher earner is harder to replace effectively than a low earner job which they might be fine with simply hiring and firing.

Both jobs are important but it's more important that the higher earner (assuming he's still the higher earner after the commuting costs) brings the money into the household as that's what keeps the wolf from the door.