Is buying secondhand / brand new baby stuff a class thing?

[Throwawayname123]

NC in case I get flamed for this! But I am genuinely wondering... although I won't say which side I come down on.

I'm wondering if class affects whether people buy brand new expensive baby stuff or go for second hand?
In my experience, the upper middle class types, seem to prefer second hand stuff, although they could easily afford new, whereas the more working class want their baby to have "the best" and spend £££ on things like travel systems (even though they can't afford it as easily).

I come from a very working class family in Stoke but I'm now very middle class in Hampshire.

I buy all my clothes second hand on eBay even though I earn several times more than, for example, my Nan who wouldn't countenance wearing second hand.

I also remember when my boys were obsessed with Enjy Benjy. Buying them character t shirts made them happy. It's joyless to refuse to buy that stuff for your kids because you are snotty about brands.

This is an interesting thread!
I'd say I'm lower class, but have enough money to buy new things for my DC so buy all new, not a confidence thing as others have said, just because I don't like the thought of having my DC in clothes some other child may have worn and most likely peed in.
I also don't buy myself second hand clothes, for the same reason (who knows if the person before had a leaky bladder / skin condition etc.) Appreciate everything can be washed but id rather just buy new things as we can afford to, also only on DC 1 and find so much joy in buying him things and fully aware everything will be reused for any subsequent babies.

In our house it's the other way round. I grew up working class and DH was/is upper middle. He wanted DD to have everything brand new, unless they are hand me downs from his brother's daughter.
He's been known to physically flinch at the suggestion of buying toys from Facebook selling pages!

He doesn't mind supermarket clothes for DD though, and wouldn't buy her designer items

Lower working class here, second hand was the stuff of shame growing up. Lower income families I'm friends with insist on everything new, but on credit catalogues ect would never entertain second hand.

I think for us it comes down to two things regarding second hand items, safety and cleanliness

We wouldn't buy a second hand car seat or push chair from a safety point of view. A part may not be up to standard and you may not have noticed. Not worth the risk and with hew you also get a warranty

We went to look at a second hand bouncer or some sort of toy and DP went to the house whilst I stayed with dd in the car. He came back minutes later and said it was dirty and disgusting. This was before Covid. Our child's health won't be risked for the sake of saving a small amount of money

MIL has bought dd many toys from charity shops plus some pricey new stuff

Haha @BumpLoading but surely if you buy new stuff for a baby, it'll be peed in by them anyway? Or is their pee "special"??

Agree on not buying dirty/manky stuff though.

@cheeseismydownfall

Yes, I think your observation is correct based on my experience.

As a PP said, I think it is down to confidence, and a lack of concern about whether they are being judged.

People who claim not to 'see' or 'understand' class in this country are either lying, self-deceiving or chronically unperceptive. You don't have to like is, you don't have to buy into it, or feel bothered about it. But of course it is bloody there.

This.

A certain pair of hardwearing stripy toddler trousers was worn by every child that was born to a friend’s north Oxford NCT group over about twelve years.

I think it also depends on experience of what babies actally need / will use to some degree.
I've just had my third so I know, for example, the best and most practical highchair is the £12 one from IKEA, not the £165 snazzy one with 65 million different settings (of one you will probably use).
Same for clothes because you realise how quickly babies grow!

I would have killed to get some nice 2nd hand clothes and a 2nd hand travel system. Although we were gifted a brand new one we absolutely love and still use everyday at nearly 2.

But the sad reality is that, as I didn’t have a car, buying NICE 2nd hand clothes and toys and travel systems meant taking a taxi as I couldn’t get a bus to those parts of where I lived in less than 2 hours and I lived a 10 minute walk from the main bus and train interchange.
The things on offer near me were outworn, grubby, stretched and stained.

So I just don’t believe in these nice barely used 2nd hand things everyone goes on about.

I'm distinctly middle class - like, the epitome of middle class, Volvo driver, live in South West London, DD at an independent school, work in a tech start up and I buy second hand for expensive things that I'm not sure DD will take to.

So I bought a new pushchair because I knew we'd use it, but when it comes to Micro Scooters, and bikes and such, I always start second-hand to figure out if it's worth the investment in a new one. Ditto nursery clothes.

O think the pp that said a grubby looking kid on slightly wrong sized clothed is fine if their quirky middle or upper class but clearly neglected of they're parking class has it right. it's the same for behaviour to a degree. Oh just exuberant children Vs well he clearly can't behave.

I do buy secondhand (Def working class) but o make sure it's decent stuff, and discard anything that's marked etc.

We also pass stiff around, some passed over from my middle class friends but also between myself and working class friends. I don't have any upper class friends 🤣🤣

,

@grisen ebay?

I had a baby in May (my third). A huge amount of her clothes so far have been purchased from Ebay, most of it secondhand. Because babies grow so quickly, the vast majority of it has barely been worn. Of course you get the odd crappy thing but in the main it's been excellent! I have honestly saved hundreds and also like to reuse where possible.

@Nicknamegoeshere didn’t have any luck with what I bought on there. Out of 6 like new, perfect condition only one arrived without holes and stains.
Instead we just had and have a tiny wardrobe for our son and we’ve given 90% of it away for free as selling or buying online is obviously beyond me. Also like a PP I like my own time and convenience more than something 2nd hand... but I guess my experience is what caused that.

I do agree to a certain extent. We brought an expensive pram for DC1 (for some reason didn't cross my mind to look for second hand) which we used for DC2 and DC3 despite being able to afford a new one each time. Meanwhile I know of people who used to scrimp and save to have a variety of different prams for each DC. Clothes I'v passed down, I got good quality stuff that washed well. I have/had OCD though so that perhaps explains the lack of eBay clothes etc.
I'm very much middle class.

I avoid character clothing because it often comes with twee slogans.

@PineappleUpsideDownCake Frugi clothes can work out cheaper than buying new supermarket clothes, if you buy them in the sale then sell them on. I've even made a profit on some of them.

This is an interesting thread.

IME the more wealthy people I know prioritise the bigger things: their mortgage on a big house and their DC's private school fees etc. So they are prepared to scrimp on what they think are the lesser things.

For people who are not in a position to have those large financial burdens, their big investments will be brand new, top of the range products.

We done a mixture of both, anything safety wise such as cots and car seats are brand new but then like baby baths, bumbo etc were second hand. We're from working class background. I just couldn't see the point in paying £30 for a shnuggle when I could get it virtually brand new for £5 off Facebook for example. Obviously mattresses and stuff are different. Oh and I bought the travel system I wanted brand new, but it's neutral so full intention was it can be used for another baby.

I want my babies to have the best of the best of course but I'm not bloody stupid with money either.

I remember having a rather awkward conversation with a dad in a public library who had three DCs all at private school. It was early-July and he asked if we had any nice plans for a summer holiday.

I said we were going to a seaside village in Spain that we'd been going to for a decade. He seemed a bit taken aback and went on to explain that having three DCs at private school meant that camping in Cornwall each August was the best they could manage!

I struggled to sympathise with him...!

upherfordancing, I agree with that observation. The most wealthy people I know have beautiful homes (always old, large, well located), solid middle class cars (Discovery, VX 90 etc) and children in independent school. Yet I can't think of any of them who would spend money on designer children's clothes or waste money buying new when they could pick up something they need second hand. And plenty shop at both Aldi and Waitrose.

They do spend money on travel, though, and bikes

All the main things I bought new for pfb (pram, cot, bouncer, car seat, etc) but I did buy some 2nd hand clothes, and toys. My parents had a load of toys at their house, all bought from charity shops. (When we were growing up we always had hand me down clothes and toys because my parents could afford new, but actually by the time they were GPs they were much more comfortably off and could have got new but Ddad in particular was v thrifty)
Not long after I got it I was seriously unimpressed with the bugaboo pram and got a 2nd hand double off ebay for 2nd baby.

For me, it’s just the sheer madness of spending a fortune on stuff she’ll wear for literally a few hours. It’s crappy for the environment and she doesn’t even know.

I saw on aprogramme about the Radfords she got a new pram for each baby. My first thought was how would they afford it, and the second was where on earth would you store them once you had more than 2 or 3? She must ebay them unless they have a garage of 20-odd prams.

Yes my experience, and same as the kids get older, fairly low income parents seem to be buying more Christmas presents etc. My kids walked around in mismatched clothes, hand me downs etc but I know people who waste a fortune they don't have on designer gear for their kids.