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Original poster

Naked opinions

150 replies

PrincessGraceless · 16/11/2020 20:38

What are your thoughts about a dad being naked in front of adult daughter (early 20s)? Not swanning around the house, but walking around bedroom after a shower, with daughter sitting on the bed chatting. Neither seem bothered by it. So ok I guess? (She would not do this herself btw - not even partially-dressed, being very private.)

OP posts:
Anotherducker · 16/11/2020 22:22

I don’t see a problem with it.

Pepperama · 16/11/2020 22:25

A non-issue if it’s the norm between them and both comfy with it. Both my and my partners family have never had a problem with being nude around family so that’s how we pass it on. No need to lock bathroom doors when in the shower unless we have guests etc. More tricky in your case where dad is comfortable and you sound like you’re not so much.
Or is it a new thing? In which case I think that’s different

topcat2014 · 16/11/2020 22:26

DD 14 sometimes comes into my room or the shower when I am in it.

Usually says ewe or ugh then leaves.

I don't freak out about it but would never inflict the view on her which is very different.

Sparklingbrook · 16/11/2020 22:26

Exactly @formerbabe.

I am now wondering how many teenagers there are out there stressing about how to start a conversation with their parents about not wandering around naked but not knowing how to.

Fudgsicles · 16/11/2020 22:26

Nope, I think it's wrong. My eldest is preteen and he hasn't seen me naked for a few years and definitely hasn't allowed me in the bathroom while he showers for a long time now. DD sees me topless with just pants on but no more. And no children in my bedroom unless they knock.

There is no need for parents to be walking around naked in front of teens/adult children. I think it is highly inappropriate.

dottycat123 · 16/11/2020 22:26

Normal in my house with similar aged dc.

Original poster
PrincessGraceless · 16/11/2020 22:33

@Pepperama

A non-issue if it’s the norm between them and both comfy with it. Both my and my partners family have never had a problem with being nude around family so that’s how we pass it on. No need to lock bathroom doors when in the shower unless we have guests etc. More tricky in your case where dad is comfortable and you sound like you’re not so much. Or is it a new thing? In which case I think that’s different
No it’s not new - but I’m aware daughter is not a child any more and she is so private that she won’t even let me in her room if she is changing her top. I guess because I would have been utterly shocked if my dad had appeared naked in front of me at 20 odd, I just wanted to see what others thought about it. I have found all the feedback really interesting. Thank you al!
OP posts:
GlamGiraffe · 16/11/2020 22:34

Normal in my house.my 18 yearold don walks into rooms when im completely naked and chats away. Was normal in the house i grew up in too.

People look at your faces when they are talking to to you not your body.

If the peole involved arent self conscious it doesn't matter. Everyone has different levels of body confidence both for themselves and regarding being around other people.

Feelingthelobe · 16/11/2020 22:35

Normal here. Was normal in our home as kids. Is also completely normal for near enough everyone in other parts of the world.

What’s the possible issue? I don’t get it

Sparklingbrook · 16/11/2020 22:39

As long as everyone in the household is happy and comfortable with whatever they do then it really doesn't matter I suppose. But you don't know how your DD really feels by the sound of it OP and this is what matters here, especially as she is a private person.

We prefer to not be naked around our adult DC and they feel the same not being naked around us. That's normal for us.

Shehz21 · 16/11/2020 22:41

Grim and a big no no in our house.

CherryPavlova · 16/11/2020 22:41

@Sparklingbrook

Where does all this walking about naked in front of teenagers take place? Does nobody have a bedroom door?

I don't think you should wait for teenagers to tell you they don't like it. What if they don't know how to say it?

Ours are beyond teenage now. It’s not a determination to walk around naked but something that happens if they use our bathroom, come to steal running socks or a pair of tights, come for a morning cup of coffee etc. Or if swimming with us in an isolated spot.

They boss us around about most things. They tell us about most things they don’t like or want us to do. I suspect they’d not come up our stairs or out by the pool if they were bothered. We have never really discussed it as it’s a non issue. There may have been the odd incredulous conversation over the years that a friend had never seen their parents in bed or having a wee etc.

AnyFucker · 16/11/2020 22:45

I must point out that not for one second do I think there is anything inappropriate going on

Why are you asking us then ?

tobee · 16/11/2020 22:45

@Sparklingbrook

Exactly *@formerbabe*.

I am now wondering how many teenagers there are out there stressing about how to start a conversation with their parents about not wandering around naked but not knowing how to.

If you've got a good relationship with your dc it shouldn't be a problem? I think "uptight" parents, to use op's expression, tend to have uptight dc.

Sparklingbrook · 16/11/2020 22:46

@CherryPavlova that's your normal then-if it works for you then great.

tobee · 16/11/2020 22:48

Why is it "wrong" or "grim"? Is everyone just thinking everyone is an abuser?

Stuff that's hidden or not talked about amongst families tended to have the most dodgy things going on ime.

Sparklingbrook · 16/11/2020 22:49

If you've got a good relationship with your dc it shouldn't be a problem? I think "uptight" parents, to use op's expression, tend to have uptight dc.

I don't agree with this at all. No matter how good their relationship is DC can find it difficult to raise things with their parents. 'I don't particularly want to see you naked any more Dad' could be a tough conversation to start.

formerbabe · 16/11/2020 22:50

I hate posters on here calling those of us who don't want to walk round naked 'uptight'. I'm not uptight and I actually find it quite coercive and creepy to try to insinuate that there's something wrong with someone because their boundaries are different to theirs.

tobee · 16/11/2020 22:50

@Sparklingbrook

If you've got a good relationship with your dc it shouldn't be a problem? I think "uptight" parents, to use op's expression, tend to have uptight dc.

I don't agree with this at all. No matter how good their relationship is DC can find it difficult to raise things with their parents. 'I don't particularly want to see you naked any more Dad' could be a tough conversation to start.

But why does that follow?

Sparklingbrook · 16/11/2020 22:51

@formerbabe

I hate posters on here calling those of us who don't want to walk round naked 'uptight'. I'm not uptight and I actually find it quite coercive and creepy to try to insinuate that there's something wrong with someone because their boundaries are different to theirs.
I totally agree. I am quite reassured by the amount of posters saying it's not appropriate though.
tobee · 16/11/2020 22:51

@formerbabe

I hate posters on here calling those of us who don't want to walk round naked 'uptight'. I'm not uptight and I actually find it quite coercive and creepy to try to insinuate that there's something wrong with someone because their boundaries are different to theirs.

I didn't call you uptight myself. I was using the expression op used. Why is it coercive?

CherryPavlova · 16/11/2020 22:53

If she doesn’t want to see her father naked she can stay out of the bedroom or bathroom. I don’t imagine she’s dragged screaming and kicking for a chat.

tobee · 16/11/2020 22:54

I find it a bit off that people are assuming parents who are not bothered are coercive abusers. Which is, maybe, more offensive than calling someone "uptight" ( even if it's themselves)

tobee · 16/11/2020 22:54

@CherryPavlova

If she doesn’t want to see her father naked she can stay out of the bedroom or bathroom. I don’t imagine she’s dragged screaming and kicking for a chat.

Exactly!

formerbabe · 16/11/2020 22:55

I didn't call you uptight myself. I was using the expression op used. Why is it coercive?

Because calling someone uptight is insulting them for having different boundaries..and potentially trying to shame them into doing something they are uncomfortable with.

To all the posters who think it's uptight, if your dc expressed they were uncomfortable with nudity, would you call them uptight?