DS said he was called a “Paki” at school today. How to handle with school?

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DS (9) came home quite upset today as he said a boy in his class called him a “Paki” on the way to a lesson. He told a teacher who dismissed what he said by saying it was probably a misunderstanding and to put it behind him. The boy denied it and said he called him the name of a moon. Nobody else heard it. I said it’s possible the boy didn’t know what it meant or that DS misunderstood. He’s a tough one and very little phases him but he was genuinely angry. I don’t want to minimize how he is feeling (as the teacher did) but I’m not sure how to approach it with school given that there were no witnesses. He attends a prep, which isn’t very hot on discussing/acknowledging issues of diversity.

I would absolutely raise it with school. They don’t need proof to do a general anti-racism talk with the whole class to hopefully prevent this from happening to your child again.

It's very possible that the boy didn't understand the seriousness of the word, but that's all the more reason it needs to be dealt with. Even if they can't prove what was said in that instance, I agree with the above that class talk about offensive and racist language might be in order.

I would raise it with the school, they have a legal
Duty to Report and record racism.

Sometimes they try and downplay it as the
School doesn’t want it on their record.

I’m sorry your son suffered racism at school.

Thank you all for your understanding comments. I’ll send an email to his class teacher.

I would also ask his class teacher to keep you informed of the outcome and how they are proceeding.

I would email the school headteacher and tell them you want it dealt with officially. Sometimes a general talk to the class isn't enough and doesn't deter it happening again. Don't let them brush what your child heard under the carpet as just something he misheard. It'll eventually teach him its ok for people to be racist towards him and no-one will stand up for him. Teachers are supposed to be impartial and always speak out against this kind of thing but its not always the case. Good luck Op and don't feel you or your son is in the wrong here.

Sorry, I would also add that you were very happy with how it was dealt with at the time...

He told a teacher who dismissed what he said by saying it was probably a misunderstanding and to put it behind him.

He shouldn’t be dismissed and told to put it behind him.

Every single time I hear something like this I wonder what parents are teaching their kids at home !
Definitely bring it up , it's a disgusting word , I'm sorry your son had to hear it .

Oh no, very UNhappy!!

If the school try to pass it off with you as a misunderstanding I'd be asking how being called a Paki can be misunderstood.

I look white but am mixed heritage and the number of people who come out with racist crap to me (while assuming I'm white) is sickening.

Minimisation of racist behaviour is discrimination. I'd point that out too.

I think you should report as a racist incident which needs to be dealt with

There is a requirement to report all incidences of racism to the local authority, even if it's an independent school (in England, sorry don't know about Scotland, NI or Wales)
Please contact school and find out what their follow up is. Brushing this off isn't acceptable, as that child is going to continue to propagate his abhorrent views.
I hope your son is ok and understands that some people are narrow minded or nasty, but most people are not at all like that.

Your DS might have misunderstood but the teacher had no way of knowing that and it is hard to imagine what could be said that sounds like that word so the chances he misunderstood are pretty slim. The teacher should have addressed it and not minimised it. Also, if your DS had misunderstood it doesn't make sense to say put it behind him as if he hadn't been called the name there wouldn't be anything to put behind him.

Im white english with mixed heritage children. I was told today people don't see me as white but BAME as thats what my family make up is. A 9 year old clearly knows that word is not ok and cannot play it down in anyway. School have an obligation to report things like this to their LEA.

How bizzare that the teacher didn't feel to investigate this further.
Absolutely needs to be handled with urgency and escalation.

This is one of those 'did that really just happen to me' moments and he needs you to believe him.

Ask the school how they plan on addressing this child and his parents and say that you want a copy of the incident for your records.

Schools really do need to take a stance on these kind of matters but some would rather brush it off so they dont have to deal with it. Before the half term my son came home from school saying they'd been read a book about how different people were created. All people started out as clay and were put into an oven. White people were cooked just right and stayed white and black people were burnt in the oven, hence their skin colour. Absolute racism at its best. This was for a class of 8 year olds.

Hello

I'm a white mother of a mixed heritage child - please please don't let this drop.

The teacher was horribly wrong and this needs to be taken up with the head - you need to be kept informed as to what the outcome is, if you are not happy with the outcome or no action is taken you should think of taking this up with the board of governors.

These racist aggressive behaviours can damage children and they need to be eradicated from our schools.

Good luck - also might be worth confirming with your son that it's ok that he feels angry - the comment was racist - the teacher was wrong and that you hear him.

Raise it with the head. My daughter experienced a racist incident before the holidays and the teacher in charge hadn’t dealt with it properly. The head was mortified and dealt with it really well, and reported it as it needs to be. I didn’t even bother with the class teacher and just went to the head. It’s too serious not to in my opinion. Which was also the opinion of my mother who was herself a headteacher before retiring.

Before the half term my son came home from school saying they'd been read a book about how different people were created. All people started out as clay and were put into an oven.

Holy crap! I take it that was to highlight racism rather than to promote white supremacy??!!

What do you mean the name of a moon?

I would absolutely report this formally. Your poor boy to have to deal with this at such a young age. It doesn’t sound like a misunderstanding, I would be raising hell with the school.

It was as part of black history month.the child were read a story about an african folklore tale. Said book has now been removed from school.

I would absolutely raise it with the school, dismissing it like that is outrageous. Maybe the boy didn't say it or doesn't know what it means or the connotations but the school should definitely have done something about it

Don't email the class teacher. She's had her chance to deal with it and she's messed up. As pp have said, say you want this dealt with officially. It should be logged as a racist incident and the governors informed. Is this the first time something like this has happened?

@MissEliza in my 43 years, I’ve experienced one incident of being called a Paki. It’s the first time DS has experienced it. The child in question has some behavioural issues.