Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Can a man fall in love with an ugly woman?

154 replies

BeMoreGenerally · 16/10/2020 23:02

Do you think?

OP posts:
mumwon · 16/10/2020 23:52

(re the haggard bit)
I suspect there are plenty of women who look haggard especially if they have dc who don't sleep...
Or noisy neighbours (that seems half of mumsnet!)

NorthDowns · 17/10/2020 00:06

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

BooFuckingHoo2 · 17/10/2020 00:06

We love woman who care, are compassionate and consider others.

Bow down a man has spokenHmm

BooFuckingHoo2 · 17/10/2020 00:17

The only “ugly” woman I know is one who’s conventionally attractive but has a permanent sneer etched on her face.

Everyone else I know, whilst they may not always be “conventionally” attractive is definitely not ugly because if you spend a few minutes in their company their personality shines through.

LilQueenie · 17/10/2020 00:33

No because when it come to skin deep there is no such thing as ugly. What lies beneath is much more important, easily hidden and lurks them most danger. That is where ugly lives.

chrislilleyswig · 17/10/2020 00:42

@2pinkginsplease

What is ugly?

There is someone out there for everyone!

That's not really helpful to sa OP. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and one person's ugly is another's beautiful

It's just unfortunate that so many people can't find the match

FatherTedsBankAccount · 17/10/2020 04:40

We love woman who care, are compassionate and consider others

Aka selfless doormats and martyrs?

VashtaNerada · 17/10/2020 04:44

I wonder sometimes if it’s easier for less attractive women to find ‘the one’ because women who are truly stunning may wonder if partners are only attracted to their looks. Of course beauty is subjective and the more we like being around someone the less we see their ‘flaws’.

SleepingStandingUp · 17/10/2020 04:47

No.

I think if a man falls in love, he finds that woman beautiful in his own way.

Frownette · 17/10/2020 04:48

What on earth do you mean ugly?

I've learnt that no matter first impressions how people behave colours your perception of them. So although you might think someone is attractive at first you can only see their personality thereafter.

SadSack39 · 17/10/2020 05:12

I would rate myself about a 5 but my guy is at least a good 8 or 9 .. im definitely punching.. it happens

Zoflorabore · 17/10/2020 05:15

I’m sure I’m not the only one on here who, at some point in their lives has seen a couple walking down the street and thought “wow how did she end up with him?” And vice versa. Mean and shallow? Definitely, but I’m being honest.

Everyone has got something about them. I have very blue eyes, lots of people comment on them. I’m also very overweight. It has never been an issue for the many men who have found me attractive over the years.

Whilst the above sounds like I’m blowing my own trumpet I am very critical of myself and struggle with MH issues but even I know that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Ugly is more to do with personality. The birth of social media has changed how we perceive others. My teenage son (17) recently asked for a facial and teeth whitening which he doesn’t need because loads of people on instagram etc do it.

Frownette · 17/10/2020 05:20

@SadSack39

I would rate myself about a 5 but my guy is at least a good 8 or 9 .. im definitely punching.. it happens
Not at all, personality shines through. He's not more attractive than you because of convention
Frownette · 17/10/2020 05:20

Superficial obsession at first glance looks

GroundAlmonds · 17/10/2020 05:30

So OP posted a Q about “ugly women” and ran away? Hmm

Frownette · 17/10/2020 05:32

@GroundAlmonds appears so

Original poster
BeMoreGenerally · 17/10/2020 05:32

It's not a question for a magazine Hmm I ask because I am, and have been told, that I am ugly.

OP posts:
speakout · 17/10/2020 05:33

We love woman who care, are compassionate and consider others.

Christ.

NIce girls who love kittens, smile and shut up when told then.

NeonGenesis · 17/10/2020 05:36

Ugly is extremely subjective.

speakout · 17/10/2020 05:37

BeMoreGenerally

Don't wear the definition of yourself.

There are many characteristics of a human being. Physical appearance is one of them. I assume that is what you are talking about? Is it body image you are worried about? Facial appearance?

GroundAlmonds · 17/10/2020 05:37

@BeMoreGenerally

It's not a question for a magazine Hmm I ask because I am, and have been told, that I am ugly.
It’s not a very helpful - or kind - concept.

If that’s how you honestly think of yourself, you should probably be working on your self esteem before you even think about dating.

rattlemehearties · 17/10/2020 05:37

Who told you that you're ugly op? Why have you internalised that?

Aridane · 17/10/2020 05:39

I don’t know, OP. Shallow bitch that I am, for me, I think the answer is no. When someone’s looks are so awful that you suppress an inner gasp / look away, no, I don’t think I couldfall in love with them.

Aridane · 17/10/2020 05:40

I had it read OP’s follow on post when I posted the above so apologise if that’s insensitive

Whoever told you what they did has an ugly soul

NeonGenesis · 17/10/2020 05:41

We love woman who care, are compassionate and consider others.

Who is "we"? Is this the royal we? Or are you speaking on behalf of some sort of caring, compassionate and considerate women appreciation society?