Amusing mishearings of children

[nevernotstruggling]

Dd1 thinks the device in a petrol car is called a Cat Litter Converter.

Indulge me with more please I'm tired of covid gloom!

Well, dh went to pick dd up from school the other day and had toddler ds with him (normally he’s in nursery). She pulled her teacher aside and said ‘look my daddy’s shrunk!’ and pointed.

Teacher supposedly looked panicked and asked her to repeat herself. Then she brought dd over and asked her to say it again to Dh because she wasn’t sure she heard her right.

She said ‘I said look daddy’s shrunk he’s smaller than me!!’ and pointed at ds and laughed. Except her shrunk sounded like drunk . Teacher nervously laughed and dh tried not to laugh. 😂

As a child I got very excited about a Brownies trip to Powys Castle and was disappointed to discover that Powys and Paris are not the same.

My DS used to call Converse shoes cucumbers.
My friends daughter used to call Pear Picking Porky ice lollies Fur Fucking Forkies and we still call them this 10 years later.

I’m liking Leopard pie, it’s even better than Snake & Pigmy pie!

DS used to sing along to The Ting Tings 'it's on my knee, it's on my knee' (That's Not My Name).

My DD when aged about 6 , wondered why none of the birds at the seaside were boys. She had thought Seagulls were called Seagirls!

DD used to watch Human Brain - we all called it 'You've been framed' 🤣

My dd frequently has sponge and mustard for dessert at school.

@AfterSchoolWorry

I used to be a special needs assistant, my dd thought it was Special Knees assistant 😂😂

I did a focus group with a group of teachers about special needs provision and used speech-to-text software to transcribe it.,,.'special educational knees' all through the document 😱

After overhearing conversations, DS thinks our new puppy breed is a 'Labradog' which is so cute I can't bring myself to correct him

My dd sings…

"Free my mice. Free my mice"

Which sounds like some sort of political chant.

Also, "ba ba black sheep, are you animal?" Which could be a line from a Killers' song.

My daughter sang minger instead of manger in her first Christmas play

Toddler pronounces Qs as Fs. When we go to the duck-pond, he likes to run around pretending to be a duck. It sounds like he's swearing repeatedly.

I’ll never forget the outrage when it was ‘mince and ducklings’ for school dinner!!

DD, until very recently, thought the warning before films about flashing images was 'this film may contain flashing villagers'

DD2once pointed out the "Alarma's" in the field. (Llamas)

As a child my DH used to sing "A wean in a manger"...if you're Scottish it makes sense.

My DD told me about her friend skylark at nursery (charlotte)
Also she had bull-doze to eat at friends house (dough balls)
And was talking about when Jeremy Corbyn was on carpool karaoke (James Corden!) 🤣

My brother thought our grandfather had a boiled head.

Mil brought over a wooden nativity set for DS to play with when DS was about 18 months old. I was talking about the Jesus and DS went and got some cheese out of the fridge.

My son telling us the Easter story...apparently jesus a crown of prawns...

My son used to say, when going to his tae kwondo class, that he would "float like a butterfly, sting like a beaver"

We watch Ginger Warwickshire not Ninja Warrior!

When DD forgets things she says “I don’t November”.
She also imaginations things and likes the Disney film Beasty and the Beast.

My daughter used to call a blanket a wanket. Great source of amusement.