PFB stuff you did that you look back on and cringe.

[cheesecrack]

I remember a thread about the stuff people did for their precious first born that was pretty bonkers.

Please share - I need a laugh.

Mine are:

Knee pads for my precious crawler

And pre cutting a banana (in half) as I was worried my MIL wouldn’t do it correctly. No idea how I thought my baby could over dose on banana but there you go!

Can i join in? I adopted so mine were toddlers but they were my first born at the same time (we adopted siblings at thr same time). We stopped using salt in all food and ate really healthy, no crisps etc. I started collapsing as apparently u have low blood pressure and need added salt in my diet!

Our car was bollocksed so my Dad drove DH and I home when DD was born.

DH absolutely insisted on sitting in the back, I assumed because he wanted his recently delivered wife to ride in front in comfort.

Which I'm sure was part of it, but actually what he wanted to do was sit in the middle, beside the car seat, in a sort of weird crab like position, with one arm and knee around the seat to provide an extra buffer, and the other hand just beside newborn DD, ready to grab her to safety in the event of my dad going over a bump too quickly.

You really had to be in the front looking through the vanity mirror to appreciate it, but it was the most hilariously awkward thing I'd ever seen, and yes he did ask my dad to slow down when he went over a speed bump at two miles an hour

'No child of mine will spend hours stuck in front of the tele' ..... this was the 80s so not so much to watch.

@ReallySpicyCurry love the idea of crab position assumed by your husband

I was bought a classical baby lullaby CD as a gift for my first baby, and would only let him listen to that. I was not going to pollute my innocent little baby's ears with local radio station music. I honestly couldn't understand how anyone could play pop music around their baby.

Three babies later and we have Radio X on most of the time

PFB is only 5 months old so expecting many more of these moments!
The craziest I can think of is weighing her wet nappies to try and work out if I was producing enough milk as EBF. Lots of panicked "but what does heavy mean? Is 120g heavy enough??"

We recently watched a video that we'd taken of our babies first bath (thats not the PFB bit ). I watched myself wash AND DRY his face and then his bum BEFORE putting him in the bath

I cringe now looking back on this. Dd was a few weeks old. My lips were a little tingly. I have never had cold sores but years ago (maybe 15 years) I had a boyfriend eight cold sores. I'd been with my husband for a decade by this point (and not kissed anyone else!). I remember googling for AGES to try and find an answer if the herpes virus could lie dormant for 15 years.

And like many others, I logged every breastfeed fastidiously. I remember being told not to do this by a breast feeding support worker, but I ignored her!

We did some slightly neurotic recording of breastfeeding in the early days because the midwife was concerned about his weight in the absolute most unhelpful way with someone who'd just had a fairly traumatic birth. But mostly we've been very chill. DSD, bless her, gets much more wound up than either of his parents!

Mind you, I think my parents used up every scrap of PFB-ing available with me! My mother's friend, whose son is the same age as me, will still gleefully produce the photo of me and D sitting in the big pram with a slice of buttered wheaten each (at near enough a year old, with a good twelve teeth between us), and my mother hovering, petrified that we'd both choke.

@BorderlineBob

We recently watched a video that we'd taken of our babies first bath (thats not the PFB bit ). I watched myself wash AND DRY his face and then his bum BEFORE putting him in the bath

I can just imagine that

“Ok baby, here we go. Nice clean bottom, and let’s dry! All good! Nice clean face and lets dry! Very good. Now into the bath you go!”

I love this thread!

In a sleep deprived haze I asked exDP to warm the babies bottle. When I heard the 'ding' of the microwave I FLEW into the kitchen and screamed at him that he was a murderer and needed to leave my flat immediately it was 3am and he thought I'd lost my mind. All I can remember is hyperventilating and telling him that I'd read hot spots from a microwave can kill a baby.

Blended wheatabix! love it - if for no other reason than the satisfaction of knowing others did things equally or more bonkers than me!

Oh crap!

Just remembered something I did that wasn't even for my baby!

Couple I babysat for had discovered that when fractious the ONLY sound that would settle the baby was the hairdryer at full blast! But they were going through hairdryers! So I RECORDED (on my beloved 2 tape deck boom box ) the sound of their hairdryer for 5 mins only...then created a 90 MIN TAPE that was just the hairdryer on a loop...

But thinking about it that's not the worst part, it's that due to my lack of proper equipment for doing this and only having my boombox it probably took me the best part of a day recording, rewinding to the start of the 5 min original recording then recording another 5 mins etc etc...

And it's just occurred to me OVER 30 YEARS LATER that I was a fucking idiot! And I don't mean for doing it at all...but because OBVIOUSLY what I SHOULD have done was recorded 10 mins worth then switched tapes and recorded another 10 mins in one go, then 20 mins etc...

Now I'm (still) shite at maths but this would surely have at least HALVED how long it took to make this Home made white noise tape...

That said baby hated after about 3 months btw! 

@Louisainlockdown on a somewhat related note we were the opposite and totally unprecious about what dd listened to - a decision that bit us on the ass when she started speaking and singing...you don't really want a 2 year old singing/quoting heavy rock and metal lyrics

Fairly certain twisted sister are at least partially responsible for dds first word being "no"

My dad jokes that babies start walking and talking PRECISELY so they can get the hell away from hovering parents and tell em to get lost!

I wrote my mum a really really in depth daily plan of exactly what my pfb routine was so that she could look after him when I went in to have my second (pfb was 11 months old)
She must have thought I was bonkers.

I ironed all of DC1's vests and baby gros.

I thought I was a rubbish mother if I didn't

I also went apeshit at DH when I was VERY pg as he was struggling with some DIY for the nursery. The words 'How can we look after a baby when you can't even lay a laminate floor?' actually came sobbing from my mouth.

Thankfully, DC have grown into remarkable and well-adjusted young people

Having stern words with any toddler who pushed/took toys from/breathed near my DS at soft play. To be honest I'm surprised I didn't get punched.

My youngest was born overseas. We couldn't drink tap water, before her first shots she had to be bathed in bottled water.

jani23001 that reminds me of how my Mum reacted when we said that we were taking our DD abroad to meet DH's extended family. We are talking a mainstream European destination here by the way, not the Amazonian rain forest or anything. My Mum freaked out and said "But what will you feed her? And suppose you can't get nappies?!"
Bless her, my Mum never left the UK in her life but I didn't expect her to think that there were no nappies on the other side of the Channel.

I love reading these :)

I was a young mum with my PFB and was SO laid back. Hence a laid back easy baby.

Now after a huge gap I've had another and I'm now obviously a lot older and much more neurotic. This baby doesn't sleep and is super clingy. Lol.

@Changethetoner

Taking the "feet to foot" safe sleeping advice a bit too seriously, and placing my PFB way down the pram, so her head was under the outer cover, but at least her feet were at the end. lol. Granny complained she liked to "see what I am pushing", but I was firm. [embarassed]

I love this one, and I love this thread

I've posted this on here before but when I was bf DD1, I washed my nipples before every single feed, no matter where I was I had to go and wash them. (If I could have sterilised them I would have!)
It was such a relief when I had my next baby to learn that this wasn't necessary at all.

When I had my pfb I ebf him & was worried that he wasn’t getting enough as sometimes he would only feed for a few mins & then fall asleep. So I used to count how many sucks he had from each nipple & if I didn’t think he’d have enough I would encourage him to have more. He is 20 now & I found the piece of paper the other day but couldn’t bring myself throw it away. I only did it for a few days or so. I think it helped me stay awake whilst feeding him during the night.

This is a wonderful thread. Full of love. Sometimes slightly crazed love, but definitely love.

And can I just say that as a willing and regular babysitter of various nieces, nephews, friend's babies, I really appreciate a written routine. I can barely remember what routine worked with my own kids. I'm deffo not going to magically know what works for another child.

And I recommend sharing a photo of any essential bedtime cuddly toys. This comes from the time I spent a very long hour with a very upset baby a few years ago only to find out that her cuddly toy was mixed up with her brothers (diff versions of the same animal). Asleep within minutes once we discovered the mix up.

I'm due my first in January and have decided not to go down the meticulous recording of everything like I'd planned

I remember being at a playgroup and asking the Health Visitor when to stop sterilising DDs bottles. She replied 'about 6 months ago'. DD was one at the time.

Ignore my last post - I just googled and apparently these days you are told to do it for 12 months. This was a long time ago but I obviously knew best ha ha