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Original poster

I am 90% sure my friend's DD is not her DH's

174 replies

SpaceOP · 02/09/2020 12:53

I have a good friend who I've known for a long time. I love her and consider her a very close friend, but she's also someone who seems all super open on the surface but there's all kinds of stuff going on below.

I have long had my suspicions about her DD. Since she was really very small, I kept being struck by how much she looks like a friend of ours. My friend and her DH are very close to this man, and have been for as long as I've known them. Recently, the man posted a picture of HIS DD who is about 5 years older than my friend's DD and I almost dropped my phone in shock. I showed DH and when looking at the picture, after a few seconds he said, "is that friend's DD from a few years ago?"

I think it's entirely possible she had an affair. I think it's possible her DH knows and has forgiven her EXCEPT that he is still very close with this man which seems odd. So my new theory is that for whatever reason, they asked him to donate sperm.

Obviously, if she wanted me to know, she'd have told me and I'm certainly not going to ask her. Ditto, I would never ever say anything to any mutual friends or even just anyone in real life in case they ever met her/her DH. So I came on here! Grin

Any other ideas on how this might have happened? Affair (known or not) and sperm donation are my main ones. I guess it's possible they used to do threesomes back in the day too (the other man was single until a few years ago but is very attractive).

OP posts:
ALLIS0N · 02/09/2020 14:07

Oh wait til this gets into the Daily Fail! How nice that will be for the children concerned.

Lweji · 02/09/2020 14:08

Unless the man's son ends up wanting to marry this girl, stay away from it.

Ariela · 02/09/2020 14:09

People can look alike but not be related. My best friend at school and I looked VERY alike, same colour hair, same height, same colour eyes, same general facial features other than I didn't have a small line of freckles and dimples when smiling, we were often taken for sisters or twins. But we'd grown up in different towns and definitely our parents didn't know each other, and we both look like our brothers who didn't look as similar to each other as we did.

thenightsky · 02/09/2020 14:12

As a baby, my DD and my friend's DS looked like twin brother and sister. Neither of us or our DHs had ever met prior to the babies being about 2 months old (I met friend at baby group). We used to call them the Midwich Cuckoos. Grin

perfumeistooexpensive · 02/09/2020 14:13

My uncle was convinced that his son wasn't his as his wife was having an affair and the child looked nothing like him. He carried this doubt to the grave. Fast forward twenty years. The son put an up to date photo of himself on SM. Looked exactly like my uncle. Sad though that there were those doubts.

1forAll74 · 02/09/2020 14:13

Well it has given you some interesting thoughts to ponder upon at least.!

Cindie943811A · 02/09/2020 14:13

DNA testing for genealogical reasons showed I am related to my best friend though we were born and grew up hundreds of miles apart, had no close relatives in common and met quite randomly later in life on the internet while in different hemispheres. In some families the familiar resemblance can be seen to descend down many generations. Thus the relationship, if there is one, may result from a common ancestor any number of generations ago. Facial resemblance is unreliable evidence of paternity. Leave well alone.

Intrepidintrovert · 02/09/2020 14:14

You call the OP nosy but you all clicked on this thread! Grin And you don’t even KNOW these people! Wink

AryaStarkWolf · 02/09/2020 14:16

Jesus, mind your own business ffs

FizzyGreenWater · 02/09/2020 14:16

Man friend is actually long-lost brother of female friend of OP and thus uncle of said DD. Man and friend cannot reveal their sibling relationship as long time ago man got on wrong side of Italian mafia while working in Rome doing his PhD on corruption in papal elections. Man discovered current pope is a hologram, mafia have kidnapped every other one of his siblings lest he reveal the truth. Man and friend don't want her kidnapped too so he denies she is his sister.

AryaStarkWolf · 02/09/2020 14:17

@Intrepidintrovert

You call the OP nosy but you all clicked on this thread! Grin And you don’t even KNOW these people! Wink
Exactly we don't know them but apparently the OP says she's a friend of this woman...not much of a friend
Lweji · 02/09/2020 14:17

Tbh, I thought it would involve dates and times of cycles.
Not just conjecture based on facial similarity.

emelsie · 02/09/2020 14:18

I know someone who had a child then later met someone else got married and had several more children , her first child looks just like her husband , much more than any of the other children and she didn't even meet him until years after she was born. So it happens.

Etinox · 02/09/2020 14:19

Get her very drunk and ask her.

Etinox · 02/09/2020 14:20
Wink Of course not. Leave well alone.
2bazookas · 02/09/2020 14:21

MYOB and SYT.

Quaagars · 02/09/2020 14:23

@2bazookas
MYOB and SYT.

Mind your own business (agreed!) but what's SYT?

MerylBleep · 02/09/2020 14:27

Of course it's gossip. It doesn't matter that none of us knows any of these people. People gossip about the `Royal Family, actors. It's gossip.she is a gossip. It not an attractive trait

Yes but the people being gossiped about in your examples are identified and may come across the gossip themselves, which can make it unpleasant. This situation is completely anonymous

IrmaFayLear · 02/09/2020 14:28

Of course people can have a suspicion - there would be no soaps without the “who is the father” storyline.

My aunt worked for a private doctor. On more than one occasion my aunt saw his previous patients out with their dcs and was astonished at the resemblance to the doctor! Apparently he had very distinctive red hair which was obviously a strong gene ...

CleverCatty · 02/09/2020 14:32

Not your business but I can see why you'd be curious. It really is best to keep out of it though.

These things either come out later, never at all etc or aren't true in the first place.

Original poster
SpaceOP · 02/09/2020 14:33

The responses on this have made me laugh. I really don't believe others wouldn't wonder - as a PP said, you all clicked on the link.

I certainly agree it's none of my business and I certainly won't be making any effort to find out the truth in any way whatsoever. I won't be asking, speculating in real life or doing DNA tests (was that really a comment upthread? Grin). My friend and her DH adore their DD. They have a good relationship with the other friend. Clearly, if something did happen, there are no lingering issues. The DH IS the DD's Dad in all the ways that matter.

But curiosity is normal. [shrug]

OP posts:
Chloemol · 02/09/2020 14:34

It’s none of your business.

AHintOfStyle · 02/09/2020 14:34

@BoreOfWhabylon

Perhaps it's your friend's DH who is father to both girls.
Absolutely could be!
NotMyFinestMoment · 02/09/2020 14:35

You need to mind your own business.

Coyoacan · 02/09/2020 14:35

I don't think there are any identifying details here for people to be jumping on the OP as if she were outing her friend.

Isn't it normal to be curious? Gossiping about people with others that might know them would definitely be wrong.