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Original poster

DD just walked in on us 😭

124 replies

Vdubcampa · 27/08/2020 01:14

As said, she woke up and threw our door open while we were dtd 😳. She’s almost 10 and said “I know what you’re doing!” I explained to her me and DH love each other very much and this is how she was made and she seemed ok but I feel like the worst person in the world right now. Did I explain it properly? I thought screaming and chasing her was the worst reaction. Be kind I feel so bad

OP posts:
Girlzroolz · 27/08/2020 04:14

I’d have used it as a ‘teaching moment’ about privacy. She’s certainly old enough to not barge through bedroom doorways. She wouldn’t like it herself? Don’t wring your hands over it. What she saw was the ‘natural consequence’ of barging in. That’s one way to learn!

Now that’s all assuming you were not dtd in the kitchen? Grin

Gancanny · 27/08/2020 07:44

You explained it fine, emphasise the importance of knocking first, and get a lock for your bedroom door so it doesn't happen again.

Original poster
Vdubcampa · 27/08/2020 07:48

Thank you. I still feel awful, was so sure she was asleep! I will have a talk with her about privacy and not barging in. I’m just mortified!

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Hiccupiscal · 27/08/2020 07:59

Did she barge in to tell you she knew what you were doing?
Or for another reason?

Dont get worrying, she 10, plenty old enough, dont be ashamed or embarrassed, it was hardly you and DH DTD on the kitchen table in broad daylike.

A firm talk about boundaries in need IMO (Knock before you come in etc), I think you did perfectly explaining DTD the way you did, I also wouldn't make it too much more of an issue by saying anything else.

liverpoolnana · 27/08/2020 08:14

Good advice about boundaries, not barging through doors etc. However, when our children were much younger than the OP, we didn't like to lock our door in case we were needed.

Which led to the youngest coming in and saying sternly 'Mummy! Daddy! Stop bouncing the cat!'.

Original poster
Vdubcampa · 27/08/2020 08:32

Something had woken her (it was quite windy outside) and she decided to throw the door open 🤦🏻‍♀️ I will talk to her today about knocking. Hopefully she forgives me!

OP posts:
TwentyViginti · 27/08/2020 08:34

bouncing the cat

Is that what you kids call it nowadays? Grin

frustrationcentral · 27/08/2020 08:37

Bouncing the cat Grin

AriettyHomily · 27/08/2020 08:39

Did you wake her up??

Kittykat93 · 27/08/2020 08:40

Oh christ you told her this is how you were made??? I'd be cringing like fuck Shock

But yeah I'm pretty sure she won't come barging in again

missyB1 · 27/08/2020 08:40

Our 11 year old shouted at us up the stairs the other day “if I’m not allowed to jump on my bed neither are you!”

Bless him he’s quite naive for his age Grin

fartyface · 27/08/2020 08:41

This happened to me once too. My child was a bit younger and didn't seem to know what it was.

I was very embarrassed about it and posted on mumsnet, where I had my arse handed to me for trolling / boasting and all sorts of other crimes.

ChaToilLeam · 27/08/2020 08:42

Why should you worry about her forgiving you? She should apologise for barging in so rudely.

dottiedodah · 27/08/2020 08:42

VdubCampa Nothing to forgive here! Yes DD was probably embarrassed. but as you say you explained beautifully to her ,and she will have a positive role model for her future R/L .Just nice to read of a problem like this ,rather than the usual two timing cheats of husbands we normally have !

weathervane1 · 27/08/2020 08:43

There is nothing for her to forgive. You are in a loving relationship and whilst no one would advocate being openly sexual in front of her, I don't think you should go around asking for her forgiveness as if you've done something wrong. Don't stigmatise making love with your DP; I think it sends the wrong message entirely. At that time of the morning you are entitled to expect some alone time and for her not to just barge in.

Chuffingchuff · 27/08/2020 08:46

Agree with @weathervane1 completely, don't apologise. You haven't done anything wrong. You were making love to your husband which you are allowed to do, and she should be knocking. Hopefully she has learnt her lesson and will next time. I'm sure when she gets older and remembers she will be mortified at what she said 😄

Bluntness100 · 27/08/2020 08:48

I’m also wondering if she did it because she could hear you and was pissed off about it.

Papergirl1968 · 27/08/2020 08:57

I actually think saying we love each other and this is the way you were made was a perfect way to handle it.
If she was half asleep maybe she won’t even remember it.

Dozycuntlaters · 27/08/2020 08:58

Oh god, this has reminded me of the time my ds walked in on me and his dad. He stuck his head in the magazine rack and pretended to rummage about and said "I didn't see a blooming thing"

I can laugh about it now but bloody hell, I was mortified at the time.

Cheetahfajita · 27/08/2020 09:02

Oh god my sister did this to my parents and says it's the most vivid memory of her childhood.

She still winces now if she's moaning about something and I ask her what it is on a scale of 1 being nothing and 10 being mum and dad having it off Grin

peachypetite · 27/08/2020 09:04

Might be an idea to get a lock so she can’t barge in?

Pinkyandthebrainz · 27/08/2020 09:05

You hope she forgives you? You need to get tougher. She's 10 and shouldn't be barging into people's bedrooms. She isn't a 4 year old.

medusawashere · 27/08/2020 09:09

What everyone else said. No one should be barging into bedrooms at ten years old. She'll get over it.

FreekStar · 27/08/2020 09:11

I wouldn't bother mentioning it again. It's something she can recall to her friends in a few years and laugh at the horror of it all- we all have a story like that from our childhoods don't we?

JudgeRindersMinder · 27/08/2020 09:12

I think you did brilliantly-especially considering that you must have had to think at 1000mph!
Something tells me she won’t be barging in again!😂

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