Answer the question above you. Wrong answers only. PART 2

[bearlyactive]

To answer the most recent question...

What to do to stop procrastinating?

Take a nap. Keep procrastinating until it gets boring.

And my next question is...

How long will it take for this thread to fill up?

Ffs buy a

Do it on your hands and knees with a scrubbing brush you last mare

How many (named) cardigans will DD lose this term?

Mom as they are all in an alternative universe which is invisible.

Why are children’s toilets soooooo low to the ground?!

Their legs are incredibly short. (I guess that's a correct answer, technically.)

Why do I keep getting my cat's hair up my nose after she sits on me?

It’s purrfect love - you know it’s true. !!
Or the cat is sending out probes so they can accurately assess your thoughts before taking over the world.

Why are we the only two on here?

Alien abduction.

What is the square root of 17?

Because us MNetters in the parallel universe were having trouble with our parallel wifi system & ended up posting in the wrong parallel universe MNET.

Why can't I get off the sofa & do the ironing?

Ooh square root of 17 is a box of salty liquorice from Tiger or Ikea.

Why can't I get off the sofa & do my ironing?

Because the sofa hid the iron.

Why is it raining 😭

It's not, it's melted snow.

What did Queen want to Break Free from?

Because God is watering the Garden of Eden but unfortunately Mrs God had a mad night out with Mr God & they imbibed far too much wine, tequila & gin & is a bit wobbly & keeps dropping the hosepipe.
Mr God has collapsed over the lawnmower & has unfortunately vomited on the cat.
Godcat is not amused.

Is 001 playing 007 undercover & following me around because she thinks I am really The Woman With The Golden Gun? 😂

Doing the housework in Coronation Street.

Is 001 playing 007 undercover & following me around because she thinks I am really The Woman With The Golden Gun? 😂

I'm not following you

Why do people think I'm following them???

Because you love me 😂

Who hid my iron in the sofa?

Because you are always just a couple of paces behind people and you have a suspicious look about you,first day back at school tommorow for Ds1 will he be up in time?

Of course. He will be up with such enthusiasm and vigour and be washed dressed fed and room tidied by 6a.m.

Why can't I find my dentist letter anywhere?

Because it's been hidden by goblins in the iron in your sofa

It is just the return to school that's made the DC so horrilje ths evening, isn't it?

The borrower's have taken it and are using it as wall paper ,why has the letter I was supposed to receive last week not arrived yet?

Room tidied by 6.30 am😂😂I'm planning on doing a major clear out after 6 months of him being a sloth
The DC are so delighted at being back at school they are not being horrid ,just delightful,but you can't recognise this behaviour as it's been so long ,where have all the black school trousers gone in Asda?

Black school trousers have been banned. All children must now wear trousers in the tartan of their nearest Scottish relative, with the school logo on.

Why can't I make decent gluten free Yorkshire puddings?

Because gluten is what keeps them from being indecent.

What's best with chips?

More chips!

Should I have a hot chocolate now?

No have a bottle of champagne.

Why is my niece & nephews school being an arse & demanding plain black masks only? (In the greater scheme of things does it really matter if the masks are stripey, camouflage or have flamingos on them? Does it affect their learning etc, etc)

Because it's a "Men in Black" school.

Dishwasher or hand washing dishes?

PS - "More chips!" - wrong answers only.

Dishwasher!

Why can't I be bothered to go to bed when I am knackered?