I may have the only teenager who agreed this was fair....

[DoorstoManual]

He has landed a job, it is full time he will be on £10 an hour, he asked what we required for bed and board.

I said £400 a month.

He said, presume that includes food......... I said it includes everything, he said that is a bargain, thank you so much.

We will save it for him, but I was so impressed that he already knew it was good value.

He sat down and worked out income, tax, NI, travel, phone etc., it was a revelation.

For the record, we have been very fluid financially for the last ten years of his life, but he has clearly not forgotten the tight times, not bone crunching tight, but tight.

Nephew minimum wage job - He has taken out a car loan for a fast car, takes holidays to USA premium economy, top of the range mobile phone, expensive clothing - it's totally unrealistic way for him to live - someone on minimum wage cannot afford a lavish lifestyle unless someone else is backrolling their costs - just as my sister is, even though she is struggling to pay bills, can't afford to get her hair cut. Nephew isn't saving for a house, why would he want to, he's got the perfect solution right there at home, she wants him to enjoy the fruits of his labour and he is certainly doing that!

He’ll still have £800 a month in his pocket, wish I did.

What a lovely lad you have OP. Well done to him for getting a job and offering this payment and well done to you for raising such a thoughtful and responsible DS

Is this job in finance by any chance

The new Richard Branson?

@Shalaalaa
He's possibly got a few credit cards going on as well? I know I did

@CrazyToast

We won't be telling him.

Sounds like you've done a fantastic job with him OP!!

Stumped as to how £400 a month is seen as "too much." That's I cried oft reasonable consider all food and bills are paid for as well.
Threads like this really make me realise how out of touch some people are. I was paying £650 a month earning £7 an hour. Quite literally had nothing left at the end of the month. Did extra things like babysitting and dog walking on the side just to make ends meet.
Good on you for teaching your DS the value of money.

@oranges29

This crazy. I don't understand why parents take money off their children if they don't need it. Leave him to enjoy the money that he has earned. Taking money off your children does not teach them 'responsibility'.

And how does "enjoying" every single penny you make, teach a teenager responsibility? How will they learn to save for a house deposit? None of us enjoy every single penny we make as that's not real life! It's a great life lesson for those earning. Especially £10 an hour!

Why should an earning adult (because he is an adult) not contribute? Presumably if he lost his job mum and dad the baillifs wouldn't kick him out it's relative to his situation.

Why is financial contribution, prudence and responsibility not a life lesson to teach your kids in the same way as cooking, manners, hygiene and morals. You're ultimately raising your kids to be adults and they can't be diddums forever. Plus OP is saving it for him anyway !

Good for you OP, a great life lesson.

I had a 20 year old come up to me (I'm in payroll) at work and query their pay/payslip deductions. I explained it was tax.

"Oh no that can't be right, I paid my tax last month"

.... welcome to the world kiddos!!!

Well done to you both for being good people 👍🏻

@Parker231 He hasn't got the place to himself. He is sharing his parents home that's the difference.

Well it’s very easy for him to say “£400 a PCM is a bargain” being on a £10 PH salary.
If he works 8 hours a day in 1 day and 2 hours he’d have the first weeks already.
Boasting doesn’t wash with me, sorry. We’ve all got them you know, op amazing kids

Well, he sounds like a nice lad, OP.

But I'm not sure how taking a set sum off a teen helps prepare them for the real world. It's paying for lots of different things at the same time that is harder to learn.

My parents never expected any money from me. Their home is my home and it still would be. DS told me if I every tried to charge him rent he'd go and live with Grandma.

Personally I would have found it patronising if my parents had saved my money for me. If they'd needed money due to their financial situation that would be a completely different matter.

Personally I would have found it patronising if my parents had saved my money for me

I bet you wouldn’t have minded too much when a few grand landed in your bank account.

Also saving it for him hardly teaches him about the real world. The Tax man certainly won’t be saving all taxes he pays to surprise him with a mega windfall in 40 years down the line.

@Awwlookatmybabyspider

Also saving it for him hardly teaches him about the real world. The Tax man certainly won’t be saving all taxes he pays to surprise him with a mega windfall in 40 years down the line.

That definitely goes into my top 10 of ridiculous comparisons I’ve read on MN.

@pumpkinpie01

It's good that he feels he is getting a bargain and wants to contribute. But if he is on £10 an hour and doing a 39 hour week doesn't that equate to roughy a third of his wage ?

I wish my bills only came to a third of my wage!!

I am staggered by how little some posters on this thread seem to understand about tax & NI

£10/h for a 37.5 hour week = £1,408.33/month after tax

£1000/month after board gives him more than enough to run a car, build some savings etc.

£200 pm is not 'paying his way' for a working adult. His food is likely to be more than that, then you have all the other bills and simply taking up space in the house.

But at least he'd be paying a good chunk towards his keep. In real terms. Unlike giving it all back to him at the end.
It's easy to 'teach' your child about budgeting when you can afford to live without the extra digs!

@LaureBerthaud

I couldn't agree more with your post.

My ds is in a full time apprenticeship. He only gets £600ish a month. I don't take any money off him as I said I'd rather he save at least £300 a month for driving lessons and a car, after that towards a house deposit. So far he has £5,000 saved and we're about to send of for his provisional. We even get treated to a couple of takeaways a month too .

£400 a month is a good price for everything included. When ds is qualified and on decent money I'll probably charge then or make him save it

Someone suggested that the money the parent is saving should go instead into a LISA account and I agree. I know that the parent intends it as a nice surprise for a house deposit but this account gives £1000 free government money per £4000 saved each year if the money is spent on buying a first property, this bonus isn't available to a parent saving on their adult child's behalf. My son lives at home and I don't need to charge him rent so my agreement with him is that he pays a modest amount towards the food and electricity bill so it doesn't cost us to have him live at home. This low amount each month is on condition that he pays the maximum into a LISA each year. He won't get a surprise "gift" of his money back from me but will get £1000 of free money from the government each year to add to his savings, which wouldn't be available if I were to save it for him.

I bet you wouldn’t have minded too much when a few grand landed in your bank account.

Of course I'd be thankful for the extra savings (which I would have been perfect capable of putting in a savings account myself) I would still be disappointed my parents didn't trust me enough with my own money. If they needed the money to survive themselves or wanted to save for their old age that would be very different, but just to hand it back? Doesn't sit well with me.

He sounds like a son to be proud of.

We told ours that we were saving it for them and this encouraged them to put more of their own money into the Lisa as well. It gave them hope that a house was an attainable dream. Previously they were of the opinion it probablely wasn't within their reach if they could only save a bit per month. Saving their rent for them in the Lisa was a big motivator for them to put in more.

I agree with OP's approach. I just have one practical question for anyone with more than one child who's done this. What do you do with the second one, if they know you're not taking it as rent but saving it for them? It seems to change the dynamic a bit.