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Original poster

What are your thoughts on all girls schools?

107 replies

Cupidity · 09/08/2020 16:45

DD is going into year 6 and we're going to have to apply for secondary schools very soon. Due to covid we haven't been able to look around any schools and so we're struggling to imagine what they are like.

One of the best secondary schools locally (if she passed the 11+) is an all girl's grammar school.

DD seems keenest on this one as it's the one her closet friends are hoping to go to. However, I'm not sure what an all girl's school will be like. What are the advantages and disadvantages of it?

OP posts:
JaneR0chester · 09/08/2020 17:01

My DDs attend an all girls' grammar school. We live very close, otherwise we wouldn't have tried (not particularly keen on grammar schools or selection).

Positives for my girls: small school, relative low numbers; no boys to "compete" against in STEM subjects; walking distance to home; good pastoral care in general; lack of boys' sexual attention in school (plenty of boys hanging around the school gates and through extra curricular activities though).

Negatives: very competitive environment (selection process seems to encourage competitive attitude); mental health issues prevalent; state school has state financial limitations and the curriculum has changed in the time we've been there to accommodate shrinking budgets.

I don't regret it, and despite any issues my kids have stated that they think they prefer it to other local alternatives (big state comprehensives).

edwinbear · 09/08/2020 17:02

I went to an all girls (independent) school. I was very happy there. It was academic and the ethos was very much about getting the best education you can to give you choice. So if you want to be a doctor/lawyer/accountant, great, but choosing to stay at home to raise your family is also a very valid choice, but a good education allows you to make that choice.

Many people worry about bullying at all girls schools, I didn’t witness any of that, it was a supportive, nurturing environment. We had a school reunion a few years back and it was fascinating the breadth of careers people had taken. Doctors, lawyers, bankers, teachers, but also many SAHM’s, women running their own businesses, even a professional story teller!

SentientAndCognisant · 09/08/2020 17:06

It depends on the child, how she settles,how she applies herself,the academic demands
I don’t have any particular issue with single education. A good. school,the right fit and a Child will flourish. Whether or not it was co-Ed or single sex
Anecdotally,my observation is people are very pro single sex education when it’s for for girls(empowering, free of male dominance,space to be) anti same sex when it’s boys (boorish, centred,can’t relate to women)

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CallarMorvern · 09/08/2020 17:23

I went to a single sex grammar school and always thought I'd want my DD to go to a mixed sex school. As it happens, we didn't have a choice and she's at a mixed comp. Having seen the reality of mixed sex schooling, I wish we'd had the option of single sex. She says most of the boys are rank (she's 15), they make sexist and lewd comments, look at porn whilst on the bus and make comments about what they are watching to the girls. They dominate the classes and get more attention.
I was actually quite shocked, no matter how nice the lads seem at home, once they are with their mates it's a real group mentality. I've been into school about some of the behaviour and there is very much a boys will be boys attitude from some of the teachers. The police were involved in one incident recently.
I would opt for single sex education in a heartbeat and so would DD.

EstherLittle · 09/08/2020 17:33

Both my daughter’s are at a girls school and it is brilliant. Pastoral care is good and they really boost the girls confidence.

My eldest was quite shy and cautious at primary school but is now the editor of the school newsletter and is part of a dance group that has performed on the South Bank.

Molly500 · 09/08/2020 17:44

Dd likes it even though she was a tomboy at primary school and mostly had boys as friends. She has male friends out of school so shes not denied male company. I think its allowed her to focus better and I wonder if she would have chosen computer science for GCSE if she'd gone to a mixed school.

Bitchinkitchen · 09/08/2020 17:49

I went to an all girls school. A daughter of mine would be educated in a single sex environment over my dead body.

Cheeseybites · 09/08/2020 17:55

I went to an all girls school, it was the only good school around.
I think it gave the girls a chance to focus solely on education for the most part and no pressure about boys.
I would have liked my dc to go to single sex schools if I had the chance

Deadringer · 09/08/2020 17:57

I have had 3 girls at our local girls only school and despite all having very different personalities they have all done well and been very happy there. Youngest dd is due to start there in 2 years and i have no doubt that she will thrive there as her sisters have. It does have a reputation for being very academic but it has a very supportive, nurturing environment.

MissDollyMix · 09/08/2020 17:58

I went to a single sex school. I was very happy there, though obviously I have nothing to compare it with. I would happily send DD to a girls school too.

circumventgatekeeper · 09/08/2020 17:58

Scared me for life, I've never been able to full relax in the company of women or trust any woman as a real friend.
I didn't even experience and bad bullying either just what would be described as normal girls being girls mean stuff.

I refused to send my eldest to an all girls as she is very like me temperament wise, my youngest would have been fine I think.

DoubleCarbs · 09/08/2020 18:00

I went to one for part of my high school, I loved it. I was a huge tomboy and didn't feel the pressure to change as I did when I went to mixed, stem was really pushed and lots of us did IT when I went to mixed I was the only one and just had far more confidence then when I was with boys, especially in typically boy dominated subjects like computing, sciences etc. Just felt it gave me far more confidence and I did better at school because of it.

BackforGood · 09/08/2020 18:01

Both my dds went to an all girls' school (and ds to an all boys' school). Not because we were particularly looking for that environment, but because, having looked at all schools they had a possible chance of getting in to, we decided that it (they) was (were) the best schools in the area.
I'd 100% choose the same again.
They weren't grammar's though.

BackforGood · 09/08/2020 18:02

I think what does make a lot of sense, is to encourage hobbies that include dc of both sexes. Let them realise that boys aren't aliens.

Marcipex · 09/08/2020 18:02

I went to an all-girls school and no one was mean to anyone! Well amongst the girls that is, many of the staff were evil old bats.

Deadringer · 09/08/2020 18:02

I meant to say that i went to a mixed school myself, and while i enjoyed my time there a lot of messing went on, who fancied who, who was a babe, who wasn't etc, and the boys were cut an awful lot of slack as regards their behaviour. This was a school with a very good reputation and it put me off mixed schools tbh.

timetest · 09/08/2020 18:03

I went to one and sent my DDs to an all girls grammar with a mixed 6th form. The DDs both say that that would be the choice for their daughters.

VirginiaWolverine · 09/08/2020 18:03

I went to an all girls school, and the thing I really appreciate about it was that for 7 years, I was in an environment where girls were expected to do everything. It wasn't the big stuff like doing science A-levels that made the difference. It was that whenever a teacher asked a pupil to carry something heavy, or reach something high, or move something big, or hold a door open, that pupil was always a girl. It was talking about sex and periods and farts and sexual harassment in the canteen because they weren't special female topics of conversation. And while there was a roughly similar arts/sciences split between the pupils there as there would have been in a mixed school, I did notice that mist of my friends in mixed schools who did science A-levels went on to study medical subjects at university, the ones from mine were as likely to do engineering or physics.

Lurchermom · 09/08/2020 18:06

I went to a state all girls grammar (2001-08). It was fabulous. I loved almost every minute of it. There was a bit of bitchiness which I think is unsurprising but we were taught to be strong, independent women. There weren't distractions in class in the form of acting out for boys, and we could talk openly about female issues etc. We also had daily assemblies about women leaders, women in religion, women in the home, women in science etc. There was no sense of female only roles or female only jobs - we were a class full of very clever teenagers learning about science and maths, so why wouldn't we go on to study it at university etc? We felt very supported.
There was a boys school next door and we had a few mixed activities and I do think that helped - orchestra and band and drama etc were mixed. So we did get a chance to socialise and learn how to be around boys. I think that was important so perhaps see if the school has a good relationship with a similar boys school.
In conclusion I loved it and would recommend it to anyone a hundred times over.

Porcupine83 · 09/08/2020 18:08

I’m a secondary teacher, and I taught in a mixed state school for years. I now work in an all girls independent school. The girls here seem much more focused on their education and aren’t distracted by long discussions about or actually doing their hair and make up in class. They all support each other to succeed whereas in my previous school when boys were around it seemed they felt it wasn’t ‘cool’ to be clever and keen. The girls in the single sex school are also fearless when it comes to public speaking and talking to other adults. Of course, this could be attributed to the different culture in private v state schools rather than just the mixed or single sex issue.

Budapestpest · 09/08/2020 18:08

I went to a girls school, can’t say what a mixed school would be like. I found the girls school fine but me and my friends were interested in boys in a way that friends at a mixed school weren’t. We simply didn’t get to see the boys being annoying etc, just became a bit obsessed with them as they seemed v desirable When we didn’t see them All the time

IsAnybodyListening · 09/08/2020 18:09

I went to an all girls school.

It was very hormonal. After 'Take That' split, half the school didn't turn up the next day. Grin

Beautiful3 · 09/08/2020 18:10

I went to an all girls school. I loved it. However when I left I found it very difficult talking to boys!!! Felt like I would have benefited from mixing with boys.

CantStandMeow · 09/08/2020 18:11

I went to an all girls secondary school.
Pros: STEM subjects were pushed and GCSE results were good.

Cons: Zero sex/relationship education bar the basics in a 1 hour science lesson. Boys were a mystery and many pupils were very naive resulting in huge amounts of teenage pregnancies. (It was the trend to wear the hospital band to school after the abortion when I was in year 11) Eating disorders were commonplace as was self-harm. Very cliquey, bitchy and massive importance placed on looks etc.

I obviously have nothing to compare it to but I agree with Bitchinkitchen

I went to an all girls school. A daughter of mine would be educated in a single sex environment over my dead body

coronafiona · 09/08/2020 18:12

I went to one (25 yrs ago) the honest reason my children will not attend is the amount of bitchiness and bullying. Absolutely rife and extremely unhealthy; even in the "in crowd" the amount of insecurity, eating disorders, trauma over boyfriends... urgh no way would I put my kids through that. I think that a mixed school brings a more balanced and healthy environment (and yes ED and bullying exist everywhere) but I think boys offset the bitching to a certain extent.