Terrible CVs

[PymChurchBeach]

Disclaimer: I know times are hard and shitty right now and a lot of people are desperate for work so probably chucking out CVs left right and centre at anything and everything.

BUT. I have worked in HR for nearly a decade now and it has always been the same. The general standard of CVs is bloody awful. I'm recruiting for a mid level role at the moment and I have seen the following:

• people using little hearts and stars instead of bullet points
• massive glamour model style photographs taking up the whole first page of a CV
• people's dates of birth and marital statuses written up at the top. Just no!!!
• wacky, colourful borders and fonts. Comic sans. Enough said.

Also - this last one is possibly controversial but when women have had a break to look after DC, there really is no need to list all the skills gained as a SAHM - e.g. "excellent time management skills etc". You can just say you had time out to raise children. That's all you need to say. I'm not going to think any the worse of you for it.

I am desperate to implement application forms rather than have CVs and cover letters but my CEO is old fashioned and will not have it.

Why would a photo need to be included on a CV?

The DOB thing used to be commonplace...

Definitely DON’T Dear sir/madame. You’ve just shown that you have not spell-checked your work. There is no e at the end of madam.

I remember a few years ago discovering that the recruitment agency I was registered with had re-written my CV complete with spelling mistakes and outright lies about my experience.

So if CVs are coming from a third party, I'd be aware of the fact that the candidate might not actually have written it. Ditto not turning up for an interview - I've done that before because the recruitment agency rang from a withheld number and didn't leave a voicemail. A month later I was on the phone with them asking if they had put me forward for anything and they tell me 'oh we had an interview for you on 29th March but you didn't answer when we rang. Well, I was at work when you rang so couldn't answer, and you didn't leave a message or send an email or text.

As someone who has always paid attention to spelling and grammar and generally sounding professional, the thing that frustrates me is that employers complain about these things but seem to hire the people anyway.

I've been to mass screenings and worn what I would wear to a 'proper' job interview.

I was astonished to see other candidates in jeans, flip flops and/or leggings.

No one needs to know or cares that you like reading, cinema, socialising. Just leave hobbies out unless it's something so incredibly fascinating (and, preferably, relevant to your job) that it will make a really good ice-breaker at interview.

@WhoWasThatMaskedWoman
Fair point well made...my CV is 2 pages of directly relevant experience so I cut these things out now but I didn’t when I was looking for a graduate job.

I was led to believe that hobbies are generally only considered relevant if they show teamwork, leadership, organization, that kind of thing. "Loner" hobbies will be ignored. But maybe that's over-generalising.

My DS will be applying for his first job soon, he’s just finishing his HND. He has ASD, he may well need more support than the average candidate, both in an interview and in the role. If he doesn’t mention this at some point how’s he ever going to get past interview stage?

Are any of these applicants 'older/mature'? I'm asking because some of the things that you are saying are not appropriate are things which I was taught to put on a CV at the time I left college in the 1980's. Seeing my son write a CV with what he has been taught at college is very different to my own.

The thing I found bewildering was the successful candidate who didn't turn up on the first day and, when nudged by the agency, sent a text on day 2 saying she had changed her mind because the commute of 7 miles along a rural A road was too much and she had changed her mind - but not thought to inform us.

And the prospective apprentice who turned up late, wobbly and stinking of cider.

And then there was the interviewee who made a persistent pass at our receptionist.

What are you supposed to put for hobbies?

I personally wouldn't list hobbies, they've never made the slightest difference either way when I've been reading CVs - in the nicest possible way, no one cares what your hobbies are, especially if they've got dozens of CVs to read. (Caveat would be if they were in some way relevant to the job).

@Awwlookatmybabyspider

"My bugbear was spelling"

Is that a valid reason to say someone should be out in the scrap heap and told. 'They're unemployable'. Just because they have trouble spelling doesn't mean they wouldn't be an excellent worker. Obviously it does depend on the line of work.

I agree with you on this baby spider. Tony Pidgley, who died recently, was the chairman of Berkeley Homes, and was often described as barely literate. yet he knew his market and thrived. www.thetimes.co.uk/article/tony-pidgley-obituary-8bsks0rt6

What about the length of a CV? I've had really conflicting advice over the years. Some say that anything more than 1 page is excessive, others say 2 pages is right, others have said that you should put everything relevant in and not worry about the page count (within reason).

I've been made redundant on mat leave, so I've got this to look forward to again

eyebrow CV writing IS taught as a skill in schools, they teach the children to do the very things that posters here are now telling us what not to do. It’s also difficult to use the internet as a resource as different websites claim to put different things in a CV, so I ask you, which information is correct?

@TeenPlusTwenties

It's been no dob no marital status etc for at least 15 years. It's illegal for them to mention your children too - happened to me, got asked if I had childcare plans - not allowed

I think for SAHM, it’s important to do things such as volunteer at the playgroup, or take on a specific role such as social media manager or treasurer for a club. If the caring responsibilities are higher (eg ageing parents or dc with disabilities) then perhaps in gentle, low impact ways, supporting related charities or documenting an advocacy role that you necessarily take when in these situations are valuable skills.

There are also free online taster courses offered by various institutions, including universities, that can be taken in your own time at your own pace but will lead to a certificate of completion an sometimes an actual qualification. These might need to be things related to the caring responsibilities you have, such as First Aid etc., but these actually, in some roles, can lead to a slight uplift in salary or hourly wage (Eg nursery workers and life guards).

These very much fill gaps on cvs and demonstrate self-motivation and engagement whilst not being expensive or non-complementary to caring roles.

It’s amazing how many graduates have a ‘driving license’ my personal bugbear.

And you’re a 22 year old bloke. ‘Watching sport’ does not count as a hobby in my book.

You can see how old someone is from their work history anyway

Not if they're an old geezer like me who's started to omit some of her earlier jobs as giving my age away irrelevant

I think in the past there was this idea that employers wanted to hire well rounded people, and therefore hobbies etc were relevant.

But that's just not true, as a rule, now. Employers are looking for specific skills and, often, industry expertise/knowledge. The fact that you enjoy reading or can cook a genuine chinese feast for 20 people is not relevant (unless, for example, the company's main clients are chinese and socialising is key. Perhaps).

But then this skill based focus means that more confusion comes in because people think that they should include every skill they have or justify every thing they do as being about gaining skills.

It is a minefield. But I'd largely agree with @PymChurchBeach. I'd add that I like to see CVs where you tell me what you achieved for yourself, your business, your team rather than just a list of responsibilities. Those might have been your responsibilities but I don't get a sense of how well you did those if they're just listed. If you tell me how you improved things, major projects you worked on etc, then I get a better sense of things.

@MillicentMartha

My DS will be applying for his first job soon, he’s just finishing his HND. He has ASD, he may well need more support than the average candidate, both in an interview and in the role. If he doesn’t mention this at some point how’s he ever going to get past interview stage?

Applications will usually include a field for someone to respond whether they consider that they have a disability and whether they will need support/adaptations at an interview. This information does not belong on the CV as an increasing number of employer's screen CVs "blind" to reduce prejudice.

@MilkTwoSugarsThanks

Maaaaany cover emails starting 'Dear Sirs'.

How should one begin an email going to a generic email box account?

Dear sir or madam is more acceptable and probably more accurate.

Given that I used to receive 10s/100s of CVs for a role and was looking for 3-4 candidates to interview then anything that gave me pause would mean that the CV was rejected. It was a sad fact of life.

If I had sufficient CVs from people that could spell, had relevant experience and had obviously cared enough to proofread then I didn't need to give anyone else the benefit of the doubt.

@Dicotyledon

Jobcentre tells is to list the useful skills we gained while being Mums. So nice to see that is a waste of time.

do they really?

@Dicotyledon

Jobcentre tells is to list the useful skills we gained while being Mums. So nice to see that is a waste of time.

do they really?