Patronii in person, anti Dementors visit the zoo

[ISaySteadyOn]

Never started a long running thread before but I figure even lurkers should take a turn. Hope the title ok.

Someone is now really sick of seeing my posts on here.

What an arsehole I am caring about my child's education.

I mean apparently I think teachers are lazy fuckers. I've not actually mentioned teachers at all. Only union's and the government. Not teachers.

Why do I do this to myself!

In the olden days, we'd hop on the bus to the Metrocentre when the weather was crap. Sigh....

@TrustTheGeneGenie

Someone is now really sick of seeing my posts on here.

What an arsehole I am caring about my child's education.

I mean apparently I think teachers are lazy fuckers. I've not actually mentioned teachers at all. Only union's and the government. Not teachers.

Why do I do this to myself!

I'm certainly not sick of your posts. You talk a great deal of sense. And I can see how you value teachers (as do I, my daughters teachers have been fab during this time). Our kids are being let down by the govt and the NEU, both are playing politics. And yes I can see it ending badly for the NEU, I'm old enough to remember the miners strike.

I've just murdered a whole village with joy this evening by needlessly, just for the shits and giggles taking my disease ridden, super-spreading 7 year old to TWO supermarkets just for the excitement of a fun packed outing for him. We didn't need to use the theme park style queue, but I pointed out that it proved that the supermarket is fun

Expensive error... we took out a whole care home by buying Top Trumps, 2 big water guns, comics (and Runners World for me all that panting and BREATHING) ice creams, chocolate and cream cakes.
Then just to infect a whole hospital, by the time our RECKLESS retail binge was over, we joined the queue for a McDrive Thru which was no worse than on real Sundays at 10:15 am.

Bless him, he really enjoyed it. He was genuinely excited by the outing and proudly telling the cashiers about how long it is since he'd been in. At the payment window at McDonalds he asked how they know to give which food to which car, and the chap pointed to his camera screens for him. I'd already dealt a fatal blow to a teacher by good naturedly bantering if all cars had been kerbing their cars. (When it was modified a year ago they left it a bit tight, and with the queuing spiral there's no space to swing wide to avoid them... I was relieved that the Ford Ka in front of me failed to as I have a people carrier. The 4x4 behind did it too so I'm vindicated that it's not just me )

I'd forgotten that last time he went to the supermarket, probably around February, he'd been doing money at school and was totally THRILLED to discover PRICES on the shelves for ALL the items. Then the prices were all printed on the RECIEPT! The reciept of my week's shop was then taken to school to share this amazing discovery for show and tell. He got Star of the Week for his excitement about it

I think I need him for a patronus as he is just such a sunny and cheerful soul.

If I didn't wake up tomorrow I don't think it would be such a bad thing. I'm ineffective as a parent, wife, employee. I thought maybe I'd be good in a crisis. Turns out I'm just weak and feeble.

I will continue to wake up and keep on. But a little bit more of me shrivels every day as the fear of this stretching into eternity grows.

@BakewellTarts the thing is I actually really do value teachers. I don't like the suggestion we can do as good a job at home. Most of us can't! We bloody need teachers. We need them in their full capacity face to face. I've not slagged teachers off because imo they are not the problem here.

These posters just don't read and assume you're attacking them when in reality it's not them you have the problem with.

I'm not old enough to remember the miners strike first hand but good Christ I have been told about it many many times. My grandad was a miner for most of his working life. It did not end well. It was incredibly incredibly sad. I really do not want to see that happen to teachers. For their own sake and that of our children.

@TrustTheGeneGenie

Someone is now really sick of seeing my posts on here.

What an arsehole I am caring about my child's education.

I mean apparently I think teachers are lazy fuckers. I've not actually mentioned teachers at all. Only union's and the government. Not teachers.

Why do I do this to myself!

You are absolutely not a teacher basher. My radar in that department is finely tuned from experience!

You talk good sense, and that just makes the dementors uncomfortable and defensive because many of them will know that they are not spouting rational logic. As posted eariler thid evening, they have been wrong time, after time, after time for the last few months and they can not acknowledge that.

There is more sense and nuanced debate creeping across the boards. People talking sense and not just familiar names from these chats are begining to find the confidence to put their heads above the parapets.

NothingIsWrong I'm so sorry you're feeling so miserable. These are terrible times, and they're making even the most cheerful of souls struggle. You're allowed to struggle, it's fine. Keep talking here

@NothingIsWrong

If I didn't wake up tomorrow I don't think it would be such a bad thing. I'm ineffective as a parent, wife, employee. I thought maybe I'd be good in a crisis. Turns out I'm just weak and feeble.

I will continue to wake up and keep on. But a little bit more of me shrivels every day as the fear of this stretching into eternity grows.

In most crises, there are things you can do about it. This is just being impotent and waiting around for the government to get reality working again, and having little else to listen to than the doommongers making their pointless prophecies.

This will pass and much quicker than the dementors predict. Keep hanging on a day at a time and we will get our real normality back

@bakewelltarts - I grew up with the miner’s strike as the background to my childhood. So many lost their jobs and families and areas still haven’t recovered. I don’t understand the longer term game here from the unions but suspect they’re being played and if I was a member I’d hope they’d be a bit more savvy. It’s because I value teachers and education I want schools to go back. The longer they’re off the easier it’ll be to get us used to online rather than teacher led classes.

I’d like teachers to be at the front of the discussion on children’s rights and safeguarding. The first to say we want creative solutions and will do our best to provide them. I’d like to see them focus on the importance of wellbeing, play and socialisation. I just can’t understand why the voices we hear are it’s too hard, it’ll be horrible, it can’t be done, children are fine without formal schooling and it’s ok to not have face time with teachers. The emphasis on this is fine in the longer term is doing a huge disservice to teachers surely. The risks to and from children seem to be very small.

@BogRollBOGOF our McD's is in the middle of a retail park with pretty limited access so the queue had nicked half of the M&S car park to stop it from blocking the one entrance and exit! I had to stand in the rain to wait for dh to pick me up, on Thursday, as he couldn't park in his usual place where I can wait under a canopy.

Leaping in here, but I've just seen a thread titled "Can’t see how children will be able to go back to school in 2021" - read a bit, "homeschooling will be the norm for the next academic year". Seriously? Has anyone actually said this? It's insane. And what's even more insane is like they're just willing it to happen!

@nothingiswrong these are trying times for the sunniest of us, at the moment. When it comes to parenting kids who have little other than us in their lives, at the moment, we're all pretty much winging it.

If your DH is being less than D towards you, then do yiu want to talk about it? Either here or in the relationships topic?

I was a supply teacher when the rules changed to permit cover supervisors. Casual supply was immediately undercut and never recovered. In my first few terms I'd get phone calls with notice and assignements for multiple days. That disappeared and never returned. It was just phonecalls from 8:00 to 8:45 when there was no more slack in the school to cover.

HLTAs now do cover since cuts over the last decade. Ds2's teacher's paternity leave was by the class TA last year. Plenty of TAs will be functioning as teachers to create capacity now (I know my friend's mum is).

There is precedent of undercutting the role of qualified teachers. It's not implausible that this can be exploited to teachers' detriment.

I deliberately didn't join the NUT as they were always the more reactive union for industrial action and they are the dominant cohort of the NEU ( formed shortly after I left teaching)

@Jourdain11 I had a brief look at that earlier, considered posting but then thought, nope, no rationality in evidence here, and backed away slowly. Sometimes there's just no point.

I loved my job. Now I hate it. It's so full on. And I have a lot of responsibility.

DH is doing his best. He's taken over food shopping and cooking as both were sending me into a tailspin because I was having to make decisions. I can't seem to focus or make decisions any more. Which is a real problem for work. He's never been much of a talker but he is trying. It's knocked us both how hard this is.

@NothingIsWrong I’ve been feeling similar. No advice but just solidarity and sympathy. I’m usually pretty positive. It’s a really hard time at the moment and lots of coping methods have gone. It’s such a supportive thread and anyone who’s struggling is safe to post here

@NothingIsWrong I know you've said you're back in medication - remember it can make you feel worse before you start to feel better.

Can you access any phone counselling?

Thanks @BogRollBOGOF

I actually just want to give my appreciation to nursery staff as well. Because they're not teachers. They're not paid enough and they do a bloody excellent job of teaching ds. Someone said on a thread oh he's at nursery he's not missing anything. It's no not true. They've taught him LOADS. more than I have I'm certain.

We told him he was going back soon and he could see his friends and his keyworker and his face lit up and he was like ??? Really?? I can see XXX. Serious excitement.

They've worked throughout with keyworker children and they've been bloody excellent. We've had the odd "challenge" set here and there too.

The teacher ds will have when he starts school has been in touch with us via app too. Which I think is excellent. There are some bloody good teachers out there but to make the most of them our children need to be in the classroom with them.

To see actual teachers replaced with some online print this out fill it in shite would be a travesty.

You can only stretch yourself so far @nothingiswrong so there is nothing wrong with not doing it all. I think my dh might empathise with how you're feeling because he's been wfh with broken sleep and I've been getting frustrated with having to explain things to him over and over. The frustration isn't because he's a failure as a husband but because, much as we love each other, we get no decent alone time, at the moment (and we're both broader autism phenotype and need it so much) and lockdown is just a pressure cooker for minor frustrations to become major resentments.

I could get phone counselling through work. I should investigate but I don't want my line manager to know.

I'm not sleeping. Eating shit. Not exercising. Drinking too much. Taking tablets that stop me feeling anything much. I want to feel normal again.

We went out today with relatives. It was so normal and nice and now that stupid fucking thread about schools being part time FOREVER and home learning being a fabulous idea has just catapulted me into deep hell.

@trustthegenegenie I had a chat with ds2's special school teacher, yesterday, and he sounded quite frustrated about not being able.to provide an environment suitable for the kids with complex difficulties. Ds2 has been risk assessed out of any school with the current rules because he he unfiltered and sociable with insane wunderlust and there is no way they can keep him in a bubble. Thankfully, he's pushed through a referral to social care and I'm hoping he can get some respite care. He desperately needs some time with someone who isn't suppressing the WHAT NOW? reflex.

Nursery was invaluable to DS1 for his SALT. His key worker was amazing at implementing strategies developing use of pronouns in ways he was interested in (which wasn't easy as he only did contruction and trains ). 1:1 stuff and small group. I always talked to him a lot in the recommended way, but he needed that extra input and expertise in specific areas of grammar.

At 3.5, I was nervous about him being ready for school in time. Fortunately he had the extra months being autumn term, but he was ready to move on at the right time, mainly thanks to experienced, dedicated nursery staff.

I am relieved that of the times to go through this situation, it is now and not when they were pre-schoolers.

The phone counselling my work subscribed to was completely confidential and they didn’t let them know who called or why. I assume they got details of what was used as part of the contract but no names. I guess it depends on the size of your workplace how identifiable you might be