I haven’t got time to fucking sunbathe!

[AlwaysDancing1234]

PIL’s popped by unannounced today (to say hello to kids from the driveway) and MIL said “ooh you having a nice day day sunbathing”. NO I’M FUCKING NOT!

I’m working bloody hard 9-10 hours each day from home whist homeschooling the kids, doing all housework etc. I’m exhausted. DH and I have told PIL’s this but they still seem to think I’m at home doing nothing. I had to end a call with a colleague due to MIL persistent doorbell ringing.

WIBU to tell her to fuck off next time?!

Have just put a “working from home, do not disturb” sign on the front door so hopefully it’ll do the trick!
(Although I’m sure MIL will think it “doesn’t apply to family”) 🤦‍♀️

Just don't answer it in that case.

Yep other people’s half baked questions are rather frustrating. My mother was moaning that her neighbour isn’t doing enough with their garden. I’m like errrr they have 3 under 5’s no childcare and work. It’s the least of their problems. In contrast my mum is retired, house paid for and 3 pensions. Her problem is being bored which isn’t an issue for most.

Your MIL does sound rather annoying. Sounds like batteries out of doorbell and a note on the front door are needed

I get this OP. I've worked from home for a few years. It's nice because it means during school holidays we can stay with my parents - I can work and DD can hang out with her grandparents but I have noticed this tendency of them (and others) to pop their head round the door at 4pm and say, "Are you still working? Gosh, you do work hard." Well, maybe but I do a full time job so not that surprising I'm still doing it at 4pm and can't just start knocking back the prosecco with you on a normal working day. It's well meant but it gets annoying after a while!

I work flat out running my own business I do fully understand.

But it makes me sad reading this, as I'd love nothing more than my PIL or parents to be close enough to pop in. My DS miss them so much and it's just far to far to drive and see either sets.

Please have the rage by all means, but be grateful for what you have which is annoying but engaged family.

Wearywithteens do have “a DH problem” as they say in Mumsnet which I am dealing with separately.

justkeepmovingon
I do appreciate we’re lucky to have family nearby. My grandparents are couple hundred miles away and it’s breaking my heart that we can’t go there see them, even to wave through the front window.
My step mother was very ill in hospital back in April and we couldn’t visit her or go and help my Dad so I am grateful for what we’ve got.

Take the batteries out of the doorbell.
Pin a note to the door "Working from home,* Do NOT Disturb"*
Yep. This ^^

@scheffsm
Utter bullshit. Ex was working hard but must of those hours God sent were spent drinking with workmates and going to a brothel.
I would have loved to have seen their faces if you'd actually said this!

@AlwaysDancing1234
Have just put a “working from home, do not disturb” sign on the front door so hopefully it’ll do the trick!

(Although I’m sure MIL will think it “doesn’t apply to family”)
I'd be inclined to add "And YES that really DOES include you!!"

@Limpshade - @Orangeblossom78. You really don’t like older people do you? Not sure what your ILs financial situation has got to do with anything? Little green eyes I suspect!

I have a good pension having worked as a senior nurse and bloody grafting for forty plus years. My husband has a good pension after thirty years in the police service, and yes, we’re mortgage free. That’s probably because we’ve paid it?

We’ve found lockdown horrendous. My husband is Italian and we can’t visit his family in Naples. I’m Irish and we can’t visit my family in Co.Galway.

I have been working again since 16th March, despite being retired, covering in operating theatres for my colleagues who have been seconded on to the Covid areas. So frankly, I don’t have time to worry about what my daughters in law are doing. I haven’t seen my grandchildren since February because working in an acute hospital, I wouldn’t even risk going near my family at all, so enjoy your WFH. I’ll think about you tonight when I start my eleventh shift since last Monday. 😡😡

"Having to quickly jump on or off a call is a normal work thing, even more so now we are all WFH. I'm sure it barely registered to your colleague"

Are you for real? You wouldn't last long in my company with that attitude! While we are incredibly flexible, leaving a work call to answer the door to mil is completely unprofessional! Yes in the current situation with kids at home you expect some interruptions but that is of "hang on a sec, tell mil to naff off" variety!

It’s shit isn’t it.

Working from home for the nhs on calls with patients I can’t just take five mins to answer the door - would you expect your dr to stop listening about your breast lump to chat to their mil? It’s bad enough that I have to explain that I might have to go and see to my child if she has a serious problem.

I really lost it at my dad at the start of this when he called me up a few times because he was bored - ffs I’d love to be bored - wfh 3/7 with a three year old dd and in work physicaly 2/7 and trying to homeschool is hell. only on Mumsnet now because I have covid so I’m stuck in bed for the last few days - and that’s not a break either because I’m still caring for the 3yr old (and she is patented by Disney plus in the main despite Dominic Cummings I haven’t asked anyone to care for her but man up and lie on sofa with her until DH gets home )

Why don't you just send a text and say:

You know I love to see you and so do the kids but please don't pop by unannounced as I am actually working and I had to put the phone down on my colleague when you came by the other day. I'm not sunbathing; Working from home means exactly that, it's best you pop round when DH is here.

If they knock on your door again, ignore them and if they complain just say: I was on a conference call and couldn't answer the door sorry.

Potty mouth... Not attractive!

Why would the OP be worried about whether you find her attractive or not, glennamy?

I have customers emailing me to ask me if I’m enjoying my time off - I wouldn’t mind if I was furloughed and they got no response but I’m home working more hours with a 2 yr old and no help.

Are you children old enough to answer the door? Train them to say "Hi Grandma! Mum's working, so she can't talk, but she said you could take us to the park!" Three birds. One stone.

Like when my mil used to think my gruelling work trips to Singapore were a “holiday”. She couldn’t get her head round travelling somewhere and working there if you were a woman anyway. Used to grate “ooh have you had a lovely time?” Err no not really

I didn't go to the door when my in laws called but it was fortunate that my husband had a day off.
If the children were young and dh wasn't off it would have been a 5 minute job ended with "I'm really sorry but I've got a conference call now for work, bye"

Its OK, I get irritated with radio presenters saying how nice it is that we can all slow down and learn to crochet or decorate the spare room or whatever.

I take my hat off to parents home schooling. WFH is hard, I am doing long days shut away on my own, and my only interruptions are my grown up sons.

I hope you get to see your grandparents soon and that your step mother is all recovered..
It's so hard.

But totally understand where you are coming from 😬

My MIL popped over unannounced- as usual, she seems to get annoyed that I’m working and keeps asking why they can’t furlough me. I keep telling her that there is too much work to be done for me to be furloughed. I’m struggling to teach the kids something/anything and then I get her making me feel guilty for not begging to be furloughed!! I can work at home just not with her there!!!!

CBUS1982, does she not realise that people who can work from home are supposed to do so, and that furlough is just for people that actually cannot work at the moment? I’m a single parent wfh full time and trying to home ed a 6yo, if I asked my firm to furlough me because it’s so hard, they would laugh in my face!

@Lincolnfield I don't like old people?! How on earth did you deduce that?

My point about the ILs being mortgage-free and having good pensions was for context, to point out that they had no money worries as well as no job or dependants, so of course they would not find lockdown stressful. We, on the other hand, have jobs to fear losing, a mortgage to fear not being able to pay, and two toddlers to juggle. I think anyone in their right mind would be envious of anyone without such worries, regardless of their age.

How you have managed to accuse me of ageism is quite something. With skills like yours, should you ever need an occupation, you would make a fantastic spin-doctor. I believe a certain B Johnson might be in need of your help.