Tonight I am packing a suitcase while my heart aches

[bloodywhitecat]

And I have a huge lump in my throat, you see the case I am packing is the case of 3 year old Dear Foster Child and all being well DFC moves in with their new family at the end of this week. We have shared a year together, a year in which the terrified child who hid at every sound, who wouldn't say 'Boo' to a goose, who wouldn't ask for food but would guard it has become a more confident, funny little person. The child who was terrified of other children and would freeze, rooted to the spot if another child came near is popular at preschool and frequently says "My friend xxxx".

I have seen DFC with their new family and it is absolutely the right thing for them but my heart is breaking just a little (and please don't say "I couldn't do that, I'd get too attached", the whole point is you do get too attached. How else could you parent them?).

Selfishly I am dreading the day they go because I can't even have a hug from a friend but I know this is the right time for this to be happening for DFC.

A family member had their dc put into care. I hope the dc was treated like your precious dfc op.
Well done...
The world needs more people like you..

Less you, OP. You're an amazing person and the little one will remember you always

Thank goodness for people like you OP 💐 your heart must break every time they leave. Thank you for what you do 🙌

You are right to be attached, if you aren’t attached to them they can’t attach to you or their forever family. You have done a wonderful thing.

You've made a difference to a little one's life , be proud .

I'm just thanking God that there are people like you in the world, OP. Thank you for all you have done for that child. xxx

OP, this child will always remember you, even as such a young age as the person who changed his/her life for the better and for ever. You made a difference in this child’s life. You’re amazing! I wish you all the best...

Wish there was more people in the world like you .

Y r they leaving is he been adopted x

You've changed the life of a little person. You've given them the start which their adoptive parents will take forward, Be proud of how much love you have given them. I'm sure that the child and parents will never forget your lovely heart.

Bless not less!

i have a tear in my eyes too, you are one amazing person
you have transformed a little childs life and you should feel very very proud

You made me cry. Thank you for what you do xxxx

A job well done op..althought it's not a job is it?

Anyway he has to move on to allow another tiny frightened being to come along, and have the help desperately needed from a wonderful foster carer like you.....
Before me my parents were foster carers and it is so bittersweet, but the good done lasts a lifetime.

I've always thought the transition of foster to adopted parents is brutal- I can see why it's done that way but god it must be so hard.

Has the process changed because of Covid?
Are the family coming in to do bedtime and breakfast etc?

Op you are amazing- well done and a virtual hug for you

You’re incredible, OP

How lovely to read that - your love will be a part of that child for ever.

What a wonderful mum you are. God doesn’t pay his debts with money.

Your DFC will be going to another family who will love and cherish their new addition.

You have transformed the life of a broken child so much so that a wonderful future awaits. Be proud of yourself. Big hugs xx

OP - you’re wonderful ❤️ Your heartbreak must be intense, I don’t know how you do your amazing role. You’ve given your DFC such an amazing grounding of confidence and love

You're wonderful!
I have a DC on my caseload moving to their forever family soon and I think the foster carer is absolutely amazing. Of course you attach to them - that's the whole point, that's the gift you give them. Foster carers who do what you do are just amazing. Thank you

Dear OP,

Don't forget that while you are packing pants, pjs, socks, t shirts , toothbrushes and teddy bears you are also putting some less tangible things into that suitcase.

Confidence. Love. Affection. Continuity. Tolerance. Consistency. Hugs. Smiles. Good memories. Understanding. Sweet dreams. Warmth. Comfort.

Intangible yes, but a solid base to build a new life and new opportunities on. You should be so proud both of yourself and your foster child.

Oh OP your post made me well up. You’re amazing! I’d love to foster one day.

Brought actual tears to my eyes. I am so glad that there are people like you, OP

@bloodywhitecat Im very sorry for your heart ache I can only imagine what you might be going through. However I want to say I am on the other side of this line... as an Adopter who is in the final stages of adoption Intros and placements etc...... That none of what i am going through can be done without people , amazingly unselfish people like YOU.

Thank you for the sacrifices you make..
.For the times you nurture these babies/children little souls so they can find a forever home.
I know nothing can ease the heartbreak of them moving on... and even now you are saying its the right thing for them.... BUT i hope the appreciation from a " New Mom" will help to ease the hurt a little.

Bless you ..