Were you forced to clean your plate as a child?

[AtaMarie]

And what effect (if any) has it had on you as an adult?

As a child I had to clear my plate, even if it made me feel sick. There are certain meals I still can't eat as I remember sitting in front of them and trying to eat them for ages after everyone had left the table.

As an adult I struggle with binge eating - I just can't feel satisfied until I am on the brink of feeling sick.

To be clear, I know I can't blame my childhood forever, I am just trying to unpick my terrible relationship with food and wondered if anyone was the same.

My parents never forced either myself or my brother to finish our plates or make any fuss about food. I would say that we both now have a healthy relationship with food and are both slim/average. I will take this attitude with my own DD (although she is v fussy and it does drive me bonkers at times!!!).

No, I was never made to clear my plate but I did have to eat the meat, money was tight and DM insisted on that. I have a revulsion of meat at times, I do eat it but it really does need to be on my terms and if I lived alone I would probably never buy or cook it.

I am an awful binge eater and eat until I feel sick when binging and to this day have to empty my plate,we were made to stay seated at the table until food was eaten as kids,can remember retching trying to eat sprouts which I have always detested and being told to empty my plate and be grateful as "kids were starving in ethiopia".i have been obese since teens.
Trying to do better with my own children,I don't force them to empty plate or anything but do let them eat probably more than I should as can't judge whether they are really hungry or not because I've never known myself.

No, I wasn't forced to finish everything.

I have a pretty healthy relationship with food now and I really enjoy trying new things. I think I tried new things as a child as well, although at the time it was really common to give children children's food, like Mac and cheese (which my mother did serve with salad), so not sure if it was that or if I did genuinely like most things. I remember many times feeling full and I was allowed to be excused from the table.

I was a terrible eater as a child very fussy. I never cleared my plate, it used to cause me a lot of upset, as dinner time became a battle my step dad wasn’t tolerant at all.

Yes, had to finish everything on the plate. I remember sitting at the table for about 2 hours after everyone else had left because I wouldn’t eat the sprouts. My mother only stopped making me eat sprouts when my DH intervened (I was about 32 by then).

My sister and I have discussed how we both find it difficult to leave food on a plate. I serve myself a small portion at home and have only have more if I’m sure I’m still hungry. I found doing intermittent fasting a revelation, and that I’m really suited to 2 meals a day.

With my DCs I always asked them to try something and if they liked it they could have more, and if they didn’t like it they could have something else. They both now eat pretty much anything (except sprouts ) and have a healthy relationship with food.

Yes and I often sat for an hour or two at the table until they gave up. I often ended up hiding the food/giving it to the DDogs. Even on my bloody birthday once. For an HOUR. My DM was a terrible cook and the plate was always piled high. I just couldn't eat it, so I often just sat there. No pudding for you wasn't a threat, I didn't want pudding. I wanted to get down and not eat the crap I was given. She denies it now of course

I never had trouble clearing my plate. I was always happy to eat everything that was put in front of me. My DS had a much smaller appetite and generally left most of her food on the plate, but she was never made to finish it. Neither of us are binge eaters, but now we both have good appetites

Never at home, thankfully, but a friend's mum was really strict about mealtimes (and also a horrendous cook) and I hated going there for dinner as she would make us finish it and it nearly made me puke trying to force down some of the stuff she made! When I told my mum, she didn't send me again. I would never have been forced to finish food at home, even if I had helped myself to the portion. I think it's so damaging and I'm sorry to everyone who grew up like that

Oh and I'm a fairly normal eater, I think. Not fussy, don't binge. I do like a slightly large portion but that's only in recent years (since DH, if I'm honest!). But I've never had any eating disorders or disordered behaviour around food, and I've never felt pressured about eating. That's one thing my mum got spot on with bringing me up (not that she didn't get anything else right, of course, just that the food thing is one of the things I think she really did nail) and I'm going to bring up my DD exactly the same.

Didn't have to eat it. If didn't and was hungry again before the next meal it would be served again. Mum tended to cook things that would get eaten, so not things I absolutely hated, but no choice in what was served. I now eat most things and am not overweight, although way too much sugar.

I had a brother who was a picky eater, ( still is at 48) I used to finish his tea off for him because I liked everything he didnt.

Yes definitely
One time I wouldn't eat my peas i was forced to sit there for an hour and eat them which I didn't as they were cold and i hate peas
Now i am in my 40's and fussy

No my parents never forced me to finish my food.
I was a fussy child when it came to food, hardly ate much soon changed as I got older now I eat just about anything.
I'm the same with my DCs I don't force either of them to eat food.
My DS is fussy right now and going through a phase of not eating much other than toast cereal etc

I was. I even had a little table alone in the hallway where I would have to sit until I'd finished. My father had a very small repertoire of foods he would eat, and flatly refused to eat any "foreign muck". This coupled with my DM's variable culinary skills meant that food became something of a battleground.
Today in contrast to many other posters, I flatly refuse to eat anything I don't want / like. Over the years I've become very adventurous and cooking is one of my favourite things to do.
DS was never forced to eat meals and from a young age to DM's outrage was allowed to serve himself. We've also always eaten as a family which I truly believe has led to a very healthy attitude to food.

Yes. I had to stay at the table until it was cleared. My parents would sit for a while and then leave as soon as they had finished eating. I've never made my children do it.

Yes. Many memories of heaving while clearing my plate. My mum wasn't a good cook and she served huge portions too. Was utterly grim. Lost shedloads of weight when I moved out at 17. Took me years to start enjoying mealtimes.

Also yes and also a binge eater (was bulimic for several years in my teens)

No, although we were encouraged to ‘eat up’ but it wasn’t a big deal not to finish everything. I’m not a big eater now, and I really only have a main course/coffee when we’re eating out. That’s adequate for me.

Yes we had to and if we didn't my stepdad would get out the ' big spoon' and force us holding our nose. We had to sit there for hours until it was gone . They soon cottoned in to DB filling his mouth and spitting in the toilet.

My DB was at my house when I went for a small spoon to eat a dessert and he remarked, " oh you can't use a big spoon either" he explained to his girlfriend and it wasn't until she said " you know that was abusive" that we actually realised

So yea, I'm 55 and still can't use a big spoon

Yes, also a binge eater

Yes I had to sit there until I'd cleared my plate. I would be gagging on the horrible food my mother gave me, knowing I hated it. I developed bulimia at 15 which lasted for 15 years; I still have major food issues at the age of 48.

no.. certainly
not wholeheartedly.

Yes if I did not eat my dinner, I got no pudding (I have always been a pudding kind of girl)

My cousin had it worse then me with my aunt, if she did not eat hers it arrived again for the next meal!

I think it’s was because we were born in the late 1950,s and early 1960’s our mothers had gone through the war with rationing!! So to not eat food was a sin to them.

I remember my mother use to say there’s people in Africa dying of hanger, and I would say well bloody send it to them then!!

Then I would get a slap round the head!! Different times!!

Yes I was. I have texture issues with food. Once the same meal was served to me every meal time for a week. I wasn't allowed any other food like toast or fruit. My mother binned it eventually as she realised I would starve rather than eat it. I ended up under consultant care as was very underweight. All her meals were tomato based, I hate tomato.

The problem is that i still feel i have to clear my plate if it is something i will eat, however much is on there. I have an unhealthy relationship with food.