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Anti Dementors, Assemble!

999 replies

Mascotte · 11/05/2020 17:46

I think I finished the last thread by accident...

OP posts:
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Leighhalfpennysthigh · 12/05/2020 20:19

123bananas. That's actually brought a smile to my miserable face.
Will they be sprayed on entry like a cloud of locusts

Or dunked in a massive bucket like a modern version of the witch trials?

Mascotte · 12/05/2020 20:19

@Leighhalfpennysthighhe lives near me and both of us at home, occasional shop so made our own decision after six weeks

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DominaShantotto · 12/05/2020 20:24

I'm scared witless about the foothold the dementors have - it's "not the right time" apparently. We "can't open up yet"... the virus isn't going away - how long exactly are we meant to lock our children up for to soothe their socially engineered anxiety? They're human beings - not some kind of project you can put on the shelves for a few months and break out for a sunny day - and they are suffering no end - but if you comment ANYTHING on here at the moment - you get told it didn't happen or that you want people to die - and it's just bloody constant - and they're winning.

I can't take much more myself - it takes every inch of willpower to get out of bed on a morning to continue on watching my kids suffer - school won't take her back as vulnerable because the Head is one who has swallowed the unions' rhetoric 100% and sent a 3 page long letter that can only be described as a rant home tonight telling parents basically that their kids are going to be utterly miserable if they send them back when school reopens, so don't do it, but legally we have to take them, but don't do it - and I can't help her stop suffering. I've sent umpteen emails laying out just how mentally unwell this child is - school still refuse, and the class teacher sends a chatty email (think her hands are being tied by the head from the impression I get) of a couple of lines and thinks that it's enough to snap her out of it... then I get told to take her to the GP, which is closed physically and will just tell me I'm being an overanxious parent again and take her to the park (so we can walk past the padlocked playgrounds and rub her pain in her some more). I have tried everything to get her some help - I've done webinars to support your child, I've followed it all to the letter but I get like 5 minutes of my bubbly little girl again followed by this hollowed out unhappy creature.

She is FUCKING SEVEN YEARS OLD.

I just get verbally abused and kicked to shit by the older child who is angry, uncertain and lashing out at the only consistent thing she can get her hands on at the moment which is me.

Bare minimum we will have another 3 weeks of this before the first wave of schools go back... probably another 2-3 weeks before they let the next wave back - that's another month and a half of them suffering like this at least (that's using the "back at school for a month" comment from the guidance). I don't think I can keep them going that much longer. I think even playgrounds weren't even down until about 4th July from what I read - that's the bit that feels really really spiteful - you can go to school if you're in these year groups - but the rest of you - fuck off and we're going to leave the playground padlocked up so you can't even go on the swings and forget how utterly shit it all feels for you - just go home and continue hurting... and I bet at that point all the learning support, the bitesize, the free learning sites and PE with Joe will stop as well so the kids will lose any routine they even have.

I cannot do this anymore - I'm sick of going to bed to lie awake wanting to end it all for me and my family. I'm sick of waking up to realise it's still going and there's another day of being stuck inside listening to the fucking internet arsefuckingmoroncockwombletwits crow and bully, and being too scared to go out much and be seen smiling in case you encounter one in the wild. I'm sick of dreading the fucking Thursday mandatory clapping and social media evaluation shitstorm afterwards. I'm sick of TV shows with smug fuckwit presenters stood artificially 200cm apart wittering on about how this street in Scunthorpe are going to stand at the end of their drives and engage in suitably "cheery but not showing any sign of overt enjoyment because that will piss someone off" conversation.

Sorry - that's a bit of an outpouring but I can't take seeing my kids suffer like this anymore and I can't fix it.

DominaShantotto · 12/05/2020 20:26

And OMG @123bananas I love you... speak more of nasopharynxes, larynxes and all that other wonderful stuff of my life back as a student, before the world fell apart and it became no further than my front door (I was doing a speech and language therapy degree... don't think it's looking like I'll be able to return - schools won't be working fully, and we're not meant to use the train so I won't be able to get there).

bookworm14 · 12/05/2020 20:28

Right there with you, DominaShantotto. I feel utterly hopeless this evening. The dementors have won.

Drivingdownthe101 · 12/05/2020 20:28

DominaShantotto I really really feel for you. DD1 is nearly 7 and the thought of her suffering like your daughter breaks my heart.

Leighhalfpennysthigh · 12/05/2020 20:29

@Mascotte brilliant! Mines 200 miles away. Not normally a problem, but this lockdown has been hard and I haven't seen him since end of Feb. Normally we manage a couple,e of weekends a month at least.
When we look back we'll probably say that this time made us stronger, that already in a year and half we've survived cancer (his, low risk prostate), unemployment (also his as an actor), the implosion of Business (mine) and a global pandemic.

Right now, however, we're just desperate to see each other and hug.

Daffodil101 · 12/05/2020 20:29

Domina ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Daffodil101 · 12/05/2020 20:31

Domina check your inbox

Mascotte · 12/05/2020 20:32

@Leighhalfpennysthigh, yep, my man and I are both old and have had a pretty spectacular amount of stuff to deal with, he has been diagnosed with a chronic and probably disabling medical condition. We've decided life's too short.

OP posts:
Mascotte · 12/05/2020 20:33

And @bookworm14 and @DominaShantotto I feel the same. I never cry but have cried fir my boy. And he's so good and stoic

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bookworm14 · 12/05/2020 20:35

Mascotte my DD (4) is so good and keeps telling us she doesn’t mind being at home, but she’s recently invented an imaginary friend and I know she’s lonely. She told me today she really misses ‘her teachers and all her friends and learning and playing’. I can’t bear it.

Leighhalfpennysthigh · 12/05/2020 20:35

@DominaShantotto no words, just 🍸 and Thanks. I don't normally advise this because I'm one, but have you tried going to the governing board? Or the LA/academy chain head?

You are not an over anxious parent so go to your GP. Your children are suffering and you and they need help. I can see that even though I don't have children!! People who say children are resilient use it as a cop out to not do anything about children's mental health and justify the lack of funding if cahms.

Do you have a car? Can you all just go out for a day?

Tappering · 12/05/2020 20:36

Dmona that's so tough. I'm so sorry that things are shit. I really hope that both of your DC manage to come through this.

Are any of the other governors sympathetic? If so then maybe a collective note to the Head telling her not to be a soul sucking dementor to rein it in a bit?

Leighhalfpennysthigh · 12/05/2020 20:36

Of course when I say no words it usually means I talk bollocks for half an hour!

Tappering · 12/05/2020 20:36

Domina that should say!

RumbaswithPumbaas · 12/05/2020 20:38

Domina Flowers that makes me want to cry. As parents we’d do anything to stop our children suffering and it must feel like the whole world is against you.

I’m just wondering about how one might go about registering ones self as a free school or childcare provider and allow children to meet with their friends that way... do you have any non-dementor parent friends who could do this with you? A social distance mental health support group for kids (aka play date) could be considered essential could it not?

Mine went to school today (keyworker space) and it was like a shot in the arm for them. Staff were really positive. they made salt dough and did yoga. It maybe helps that our head has kids at the school (they were in today).

Wish we could help IRL

DominaShantotto · 12/05/2020 20:38

Oh DD2 is amazing - she has resilience and determination I've never seen in most adults. She nearly ended up on a ventilator with pneumonia a few years ago, so never got to properly leave her nursery... and she just smiled and carried on. She smiled and carried on when she couldn't speak clearly enough to be understood until she was about 5 1/2... she smiled and carried on when she couldn't ride a bike - and for a kid with severe dyspraxia to be able to do that as she turned 7 shows some determination - but this is destroying her completely.

No one will help - school have gone into full dementor mode led by the head (doesn't help that DD2 is so down that if school did ring the one time she perked up so much they assumed there was no problem) who is even blocking staff phone calling the kids. GP saw her when she was so anxious that she was getting anxiety headaches to the point of losing chunks of vision and just said it was my neurotic parenting... I've emailed school repeatedly and they just wash their hands.

She's broken. She plays with her class of imaginary school friends all day and then can't go to sleep at night because "my brain is too full of missing my friends and wanting to play penguins with X"

Leighhalfpennysthigh · 12/05/2020 20:39

nasopharynxes, larynxes and all that other wonderful stuff of my life back as a student

Totally irrelevant post here. One of my dogs was a bit snuffly a while back so I did what I would never do for a human and googled it....

Ended up diagnosing him with a nasopharyngeal tumour amd scaring myself stupid until someone made me get a grip and buy the poor bugger some Piriton as he was having a bit of an allergic reaction!

OutwardBound2016 · 12/05/2020 20:39

DominaShantotto sending you hugs, it’s totally shit and I keep worrying about how it will end, not just for me but for everyone suffering, the masses including the vulnerable have been forgotten and it seems shitted on from a great height. Nothing I can say can help but know you are absolutely not on your own for feeling like this.

DominaShantotto · 12/05/2020 20:40

@Leighhalfpennysthigh the worst bit is - I'm a governor. The school was such a special, nurturing place before this - I can only assume, giving the benefit of the doubt, that the Head is just really fucking scared and trying to protect her staff - I can't quite think she's a child hater - but by heck it feels like it at the moment.

DominaShantotto · 12/05/2020 20:42

Yeah @RumbaswithPumbaas - the eldest (different school as we've got an infant/junior split) had been struggling too (we suspect ASD, well since lockdown it's more screamingly ASD with big flashing lights saying "ASD HERE") and I emailed them to keep them in the loop - head on the phone within a couple of hours and sorted out her going into school for a day just to reconnect. She came out a different kid - like the weight had been lifted off her shoulders.

Leighhalfpennysthigh · 12/05/2020 20:43

@DominaShantotto there are a few staff at "my" school who are in full on dementer mode, but luckily the Head is sensible and has brought us governors into the conversation about opening.

RunningNinja79 · 12/05/2020 20:43

I am so tempted to share that metro story about spraying the children on facebook and saying that will stop me sending my children to school not the virus, just to see if I can coax the odd anti dementor out. Plus it might tell me who I need to unfollow for a bit. I've already unfollowed a couple of people.

Leighhalfpennysthigh · 12/05/2020 20:44

@DominaShantotto your GP however is totally out of order, see another one.

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