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Anti-Dementor Alliance Thread - learn how to produce your patronus here

999 replies

Tappering · 09/05/2020 18:50

New thread!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
26
Igglepigglesgrubbyblanket · 09/05/2020 19:46

Can I have an elephant patronus? I want something massive and noisy

AlexisCarringtonColbyDexter · 09/05/2020 19:50

Here you are! I see we've discovered a new species of dementor. I present to you:

BBQ DEMENTORS

You can never have a BBQ ever. Washing laundry and general laundry chores are far more important than having fun!

AlexisCarringtonColbyDexter · 09/05/2020 19:51

Have been following this thread and would just like to put this here

Bloody hell! thats like the MOTHERSHIP of dementors - could it be any more scaremongering and doom laden?

TheAdventuresoftheWishingChair · 09/05/2020 19:51

I've re-joined MN just to join in with this thread. I'm grateful to have found all of you.

I'm really really struggling. I've gone from being terrified of the virus (honestly, utter raw terror. I'm sure some on here can relate. I have mental health problems and although initially I wasn't scared, the sheer number of horror stories the press was putting out finally got me down) to feeling angry.

I want lockdown to end and for people to be trusted to social distance of their own accord and as they see fit. There is clear evidence people were doing so before lockdown started. I'm in an age group where 0.2% of people die. I don't want the economy to go down the pan. I want vulnerable people to be protected where they can be (obviously! Don't we all?) but I'm also a pragmatist and don't think life is worth saving at all costs. I am a bit baffled by how many people think it's a serious tragedy for a old person in a care home who has no quality of life and who might have had years of health problems to pass away from a brief respiratory illness. My own late grandparents were thankfully very practical when it came to facing their own deaths and thought it a nonsense to get upset about dying at a good age after a life filled with lots of good things. That has rubbed off on me.

I have spent the last few years pulling myself out of a very serious mental health crisis after a lot of horrible trauma. I worked really hard and was proud of the life I was building for myself. So much of that is now at risk. There are a number of ways in which the lockdown is having a very serious and life-changing impact on my life which are too private to share but they feel devastating to live with and have pushed me to feeling suicidal at times in the last few weeks. I have good phone support for now so am doing better than I was.

Increasingly I'm just feeling hurt by seeing all the aggression about how if you don't agree with lockdown you are SELFISH and you want people to DIE. I don't, I just don't want my future to be more affected than it has to be bearing the death rate is pretty low. We seem to be standing in a sea, trying to hold back a tide which is so stupid.

It's been a very gradual shift for me to the above position so I feel a bit dirty voicing it and a bit wobbly in it all still. I do care about minimising deaths and protecting people where we can. But if we had a really bad flu year and we were told double the usual numbers would die over the winter, like hell would we shut down the whole economy like this. Why are we so bad at living with the idea of dying?

Oh and I reached out to a close friend at a low point two weeks ago and asked if she'd come and sit in my garden with me for a chat at a safe distance. She said she genuinely wanted to but people on our local FB page are shaming anyone who does things like that and she was scared. I was sitting there wanting to die and she couldn't help me (for good reason. I don't blame her. I wouldn't want to face that aggression). What the effing hell is wrong with people? Apparently I don't matter that much of society afterall.

I am not going to be going beyond this thread, I don't think. And I'm so disappointed MNHQ hasn't shut down some posters.

Jourdain11 · 09/05/2020 19:52

It is shit that you've got the double whammy of shittiness, but look at it this way.....write this year off. Get better. Get stronger. Get through it however you can. Your children are very young, in years to come they probably won't even remember this - but what they will remember is all the fun and adventures that they are going to have with you when you get better. Hold on in there.

Aww, thank you so much for that. Writing the year off is maybe a good way to look at it! In a way, it almost feels easier that everything is weird at the moment - I think I might be more depressed if we were going through all this and the world was carrying on as normal around us. (That's not to say that I don't want life to go back to normal for others - I do!)

And yes, my children are young and I hope that by the time they're older it will be something that they don't even remember. I do think that my oldest (DD8) is the only one of the three who realises the seriousness of a. my illness and b. the pandemic.

PatriciaHolm · 09/05/2020 19:52

The Boris/Costa thread is actually rather encouraging, in the sense that I'd say it's coming down some 80/20 on the side of "get a grip OP, he's allowed a takeaway coffee!"

DominaShantotto · 09/05/2020 19:53

I would quite seriously do things for a Costa and a Macdonalds breakfast right now.

IcedPurple · 09/05/2020 19:56

The Boris and a Costa thread has to be preserved for posterity, ie, MN Classics.

You simply could not make this kind of stuff up.

Pinkflipflop85 · 09/05/2020 19:58

I accidentally read some of the bbq thread.

Ds is 5 and asked if he could have bbq for dinner, so we did. It's the happiest I've seen him for weeks!

TheAdventuresoftheWishingChair · 09/05/2020 19:58

Jourdain, wishing you really well. What a shit position to have found yourself in. I hope you can stay as safe as possible and your treatment kicks your cancer's backside.

Drivingdownthe101 · 09/05/2020 20:00

IcedPurple can you imagine in 10 years time reading back over some of these threads? People outraged at the PM drinking a takeaway coffee.

AlexisCarringtonColbyDexter · 09/05/2020 20:01

@TheAdventuresoftheWishingChair

I'm so, so sorry youve been having such a horrendous time recently. I know lots of people are scared and its completely natural to feel that way.

I would say that at times like this you have to be really very strict about cutting out things of your life that you find damaging to your mental health. That might include not watching the news every day or not looking at MN (apart from this thread of course!) and actively focusing on things that lift you and give you a boost eg. comedies, or films that you've always loved etc. I see that as part of vital self care.

You can vent here- with us! Its good to get it out sometimes and I'm glad you felt comfortable enough to do that here. Its absolutely despicable that FB shits are making your support network shrink and that your friends are too scared to visit (even staying 2 metres apart). Could you arrange to meet them in a local park for a walk? you can do that whilst distancing and talk as you walk. Might be worth suggesting it.

I sincerely hope lockdown is eased soon and that gives you more freedom to access the support you need.

heroku · 09/05/2020 20:01

Just scored a full house on a dementing group Zoom call. I even had the "it's like rushing back into a burning building" one. Apparently it's all the fault of some twats in Thornton Heath having lockdown parties. Course it is.

There's not enough wine in the house for this.

IcedPurple · 09/05/2020 20:02

can you imagine in 10 years time reading back over some of these threads? People outraged at the PM drinking a takeaway coffee.

That's what I mean! It needs to be recorded for posterity because otherwise people will think we're making it up!

At one point the OP says something like how it would be fine if he picked up a Costa while doing his 'essential' shopping but not if he made a special trip just for his nonessential Costa. Because the PM queues outside Aldi with the rest of us.

ChardonnaysPetDragon · 09/05/2020 20:03

We had a BBQ and now I’m
Getting gently sloshed. Also had a VE Day celebration yesterday so between all these must have killed of at least the equivalent of a small market town.

I’ll probably end up shamed on the BBQ thread.

Can’t stand the demented batshitery.

MinesaPinot · 09/05/2020 20:03

Hello! I cannot believe the BBQ thread and the OP getting the hump over people having BBQs because she wanted to put her washing out.

Dear God.....

My Patronus is a Newfoundland dog.

Leighhalfpennysthigh · 09/05/2020 20:03

Can my patrons be a bottle of gin please?

If not the bagsy a flamingo 🦩

Jourdain11 · 09/05/2020 20:04

The other one is, "It's like going out when there's a mad gunman out on the street waiting to kill us all."

TinRoofRusty · 09/05/2020 20:05

BBQ thread needs to go into Classics, especially when responses include the likes of people should never BBQ in their garden because their neighbours might want to smell their flowers. Hilarious!

Tappering · 09/05/2020 20:06

Domina have a big socially-undistanced hug; that sounds very tough. Am hoping you get some good news about schools re-opening soon.

@TheAdventuresoftheWishingChair - welcome! BTW I love your NN. I know what you mean about the impact to MH. I have depression and anxiety which has been quite paralysing at times in my life. Lockdown has made me feel very trapped and claustrophobic - as one of my tried and tested coping mechanisms is to drive and wander round parks and garden centres. These threads have been a complete lifesaver for me in terms of keeping me grounded and knowing that there are others who feel the same way.

OP posts:
ThatLibraryMiss · 09/05/2020 20:08

Hello, my fellow serial killers!

LilacTree1 · 09/05/2020 20:08

heroku why are you zooming with these people?!

heroku · 09/05/2020 20:09

@LilacTree1 they're my family, I've got no choice!

MagdaS · 09/05/2020 20:10

I had a BBQ. My BIL came round. He’s a GP and thinks the world has gone fucking mad. We’re all now a bit tipsy but my children appear to be fine. I took my washing in first though. 😉

MagdaS · 09/05/2020 20:11

And I know we broke the ROOLES but my BIL lives on his own and is lonely. He can be a bit of a dick but frankly I feel sorry for him. He needs company.

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