Dementors can dement but we'll keep it positive here

[hobnobsaremyfavourite]

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Dementor free zone

I can't think of anything more cringeworthy than having a birthday drive by, what are you supposed to do while this happens? Stand there waving like the Queen?

Sparklingbrook I don't disagree with you TBH. But there were people posting angry face emoticons and being really unnecessarily harsh.

Love this thread. I swear half the world has turned back into oohh-I’m-telling-eight-year-olds. Dementors is a good description.

Yes, there was some anger, I think I was more . There are things worth bending the lockdown for but that's not one of them.
I can imagine posters that have never heard of it before planning to get one going.

A thread entitled 'Birthday drive-by' was never going to end well, was it?

"Just victims of the in-house drive-by
They say "jump", you say "how high?"

Thanks to the posters reminding us of the duct-tape thread, I remember that! As soon as I started getting ill, I realised that I was going to have to quarantine myself with the other Covid lepers on the threads for symptomatic people, otherwise I would lose my fucking sanity (dementors mostly stay off those as I think the reality isn't sensational enough for them, although you do get the odd twat with "But have you been TESTED?" )

It's so good to be on the other side, and on here!

I'm glad you're feeling better everythingisgin. I have no idea what we're going to do if one of us catches it as it's impossible for us have a separate room. I'm sure the dementors would say it's my own fault for not having a big enough house!

That duct tape thread was on my birthday, talk about the gift that keeps on giving!

@GrumpyMiddleAgedWoman we have a well known pain in the arse on ours too. For a couple of weeks he kept going around supermarkets taking photos of whether or not they had items people were panic buying. Naturally while urging people to stay at home.

You aren't doing it because you genuinely think people need to be reminded. You're doing it because you want to be self-righteous and put yourself at the centre of a smugness rally, where you all whip yourselves up into a frenzy about how awful everyone else is
Brilliantly superbly put. Really magnificent. So glad there is another thread. I went to spent socially distanced time with an elderly relative today and I reckon it gave them a massive boost. I really think it's time for this movement of sanity to almost become an official movement in society. I absolutely realise that bad things happen and that people do die and I don't advocating taking risks but the reality is that the chances of you getting this virus of you practise social distancing, going out alone for a walk in a remote rural area are minimal. The chances of you having serious mental health issues if you pretend the police have welded your door shut and you spend your time reading Dementors' judgmental drivel is very high.

It's like there has been a sudden rush to use the imperative mood. Stay at Home! Clap for the NHS! Save lives! How the hell can anyone NOT have heard the message by now when it's all that has been on for weeks and months in the media.

Thanks, @PinkSparklyPussyCat. Same here - DH and I couldn't sleep apart and I think it was too late anyway as we both came down with it at the same time, so one of us would have caught it from the other whilst still asymptomatic. DS (11) got it too, and I have felt like a shit mum at times for not protecting him better, but thankfully his symptoms were the mildest of the 3 of us. I too quickly got tired of all the "Gosh, I don't know how we'd manage if we only had one bathroom!!" posts, total smug-o-rama!

We have a cousin whose DP caught it, she's a cleaning demon and a scientist to boot, so very big on the whole isolating in the home thing. Nonetheless, we reckon she and their DD also caught it, but she wouldn't admit it, it was too much of a blow to her pride. She'd talk about how they'd been feverish and really tired, but in the next breath continue to say that they hadn't had it...

@everythingisginandroses

Love rage against the machine now that song is in my head

I think the thing to do with thought coming from dementors such as about not doing DIY or going for chips is use something like CBT on them.

I've done a bit over the years and basically you identify the faulty thinking behind it such as catastrophising or black and white thinking. Then you replace it with a better thought. For example doing DIY or getting chips is a nice thing to do and it's fine. That kind of thing. It's not harming anyone else / it's low risk and I don't actually care what the dementor thinks. If they want to stay in that's fine. Its up to them but I'll make my own choices. It's just hard work isn't it

The CBT is about thoughts and actions so as mentioned you can get into a negative cycle of negative dementing thoughts influencing your behaviour. For example listening to it all a staying in and getting more anxious. With time that avoidance could lead to it all seeming worse and even more scary. A negative thought cycle driven by dementors.

In contrast a positive cycle could be more like the one above with the person realising that doing the activity helped them feel better and nothing bad happened. The other people out there were buying chips as well and it was fine. They helped a local business. That kind of thing.

Change your thinking with CBT is a good book to try or there is lots online as well.

I've had depression in the past and I do stuff like mindfulness too letting thoughts go by and also visualisation such as imagining negative thoughts floating off in a black balloon!

Completely agree re: CBT. I've had problems with depression and anxiety for over 20 years, to the point of attempting suicide several times.

I've had rounds of therapy over the year, which was OK but didn't really help that much. I found 'person centred' therapy started to become counter-productive as it relies on the concept of you having the answer, which ended up making me feel very pressured when I couldn't find it and still couldn't control depressive spirals. Then I did an intense course of CBT combined with EDMR and it's been a game-changer. Still struggle with panic attacks but no suicidal ideation and am off ADs. It was hands-down the most effective thing I have done in terms of treatment.

@orangeblossom78 - it's more that there's so much fucking judging that i just feel at the end of my tether. Like when we were eating the chips someone flew their drone over the cafe which made me feel really jumpy in case I'm going to be outed as causing DEATH with my chips. It feels like being in Nineteen Eighty Four, all horrible and claustrophobic.

You know how you feel a bit discombobulated when you're bereaved and it takes a bit of time to get back to normal? It's that but the general coronavirus stress on top, and the coronavirus means I can't use many of my normal coping methods of getting through bad life events (going on holiday, meeting up with friends, family days out, going for dinner wirh DH). I might toddle down to the GP and get some antidepressants soon.

Yes it can be very helpful. Also not caring what they think. What gives their thoughts priority over your own anyway. They aren't the thought police.

DH is a handyman and obviously not working so we've ordered everything online so he can decorate the house. What else is he supposed to do, sit there staring at the walls?

Sit? SIT?! He should be kneeling on stones whilst silently contemplating the folly of his actions for even THINKING of doing some DIY. Doesn’t he know that even picking up a paintbrush could wipe out an entire swathe of nurses?

I suspect a lot of the dementors wouldn't benefit from a CBT approach because they're being completely disingenous in what they say and aren't practicing what they preach.

They just thrive on anonymously having a go at people on the internet.

I wonder what the dementors will do as things start getting better? It already is a bit: fewer cases, fewer deaths, no overwhelmed NHS. And after a while it'll be: no deaths reported today. And then: no cases reported today. And an effective treatment, and one day a vaccine. We're going to see headlines like "[yet another country] declares Covid-19 eradicated". It's not all going to be tomorrow, but it is all going to happen.

I think the truly scared will eventually feel reassured by all this and stop feeling the need to offload their fear onto everyone else. But the gleeful, the gloaters, the ones taking some weird satisfaction out of predicting doom - how will they adjust to this? Will they just keep shouting "ah, but JUST YOU WAIT for the second wave! Another lockdown is coming, mark my words!" as everyone else shrugs and goes back to their lives?

@BrightYellowDaffodil not only has he picked up a paintbrush, Wes going to be wallpapering as well. There's really no hope for him!

Guys, I have a confession to make - I went to the corner shop for some milk today because I forgot to buy any in my weekly shop, and I was in such a good mood that the owner commented on it and smiled back at me. I actually infected someone else with my happiness - God only knows how many other customers he might smile at now. I should have stayed home and grated parmesan into my espresso.

(In all fairness to the frozen milk cubes poster, I remember that thread and it was at a time when I was feeling disproportionately anxious about everything too. It's funny in retrpspect, but hopefully it was just a passing moment of madness and they've changed their mind by now!)

Anyway, my real reason for telling you all this is so I can show off about why I was smiling in the first place, which is because the guy I fancy at work drunk texted me last night and called me beautiful And now we're going on a date whenever it's allowed, so presumably some time in 2024 That frivolity alone is probably directly responsible for at least sixteen deaths.

I bought the cider. I also bought Love Hearts and Wotsits. There was not a soul in the shop, no social distancing shenanigans.

Does anyone remember that poster who used to describe things like as 'creepy wee brackets'? I don't remember her username, don't think she's around anymore (unless she's just changed it).

@GoldenOmber

My guess is they’ll proudly announce that even though lockdown has ended THEY are carrying it on because they are the only ones who care about people who are dying. They’ll scold people going back to work etc and tell them they are murdering people. Anyone who sends their kids back to school is a teacher serial killer and they’ll brag that they are homeschooling their kids until 2040 because they love their kids and don’t want them to die!
They’ll also be screeching that lockdown wasn’t long enough or strict enough and they’ll be telling us all to mark their words that a second wave is coming and it will be 10000000 x worse than the first and that covid will mutate into a Ebola- covid hybrid and the second wave will be called Ebo-vid to reflect this deadly mutation and they’ll be wetting themselves that lots MORE PEOPLE WILL DIE!

Anyway, my real reason for telling you all this is so I can show off about why I was smiling in the first place, which is because the guy I fancy at work drunk texted me last night and called me beautiful blush And now we're going on a date whenever it's allowed, so presumably some time in 2024 grin That frivolity alone is probably directly responsible for at least sixteen deaths

Brilliant! This is awesome.

You did just murder an entire ITU ward with your smiling though so for that shame on you!

Wallpapering?! Which part of 'essential' don't you understand? I don't know how you people live with yourselves!

@GoldenOmber - I dunno, agree it'll be interesting to see. I almost feel sorry for some of the Dementors because I suspect they are probably very anxious and unhappy people generally, and I would hate to be inside their heads. The current situation has given them a good way to project and try to normalise these feelings, and to try and impose them upon others (see today's 'Husband trying to impose lockdown long-term' thread for examples). They will always find things to catastrophise about, but this is a biggie, and they'll miss it when it's gone for sure.

Sometimes I feel like telling them: "OK, I've had Covid-19 and it was shit but it's not the Black Death and I didn't die and wasn't hospitalised, and nor has anyone else I've known who's had it. I'm lucky, but not as lucky as you make out. I mean this nicely, but you need to calm the fuck down". I generally don't do this, of course:

1. I know I won't get anywhere - they love The Fear and hate anyone spoiling it for them.
2. Therefore, they are liable to either say: "Well good for you, but my friend's aunt DIED of it. Lots of people ARE DYING and WILL DIE, including YOUNG AND HEALTHY PEOPLE, so your experience is irrelevant", or:
3. "Well, how do you KNOW you've had Covid-19?! People keep saying they've had all these symptoms, but unless you have been TESTED you don't know, so you are being unhelpful and should keep your mouth SHUT!"

Etc...