Dementors can dement but we'll keep it positive here

[hobnobsaremyfavourite]

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Dementor free zone

I’ve had a fair bit of experience with hospitals and although a generally anxious person I’m relatively comfortable with risk related to illness. The family member I mentioned who has gone a little bit mad over this is younger than me, with a very small family and to my knowledge has never had any family/friend bereavement so I do think this is a factor. We will never know the dementor demographic and why they feel the way they do.

I'm so glad we can go out for walks etc not like in e.g. Italy or Spain where they had to stay in full stop - that would have been so hard. I guess focusing on some stuff to be grateful for does help. Altho talk of being ashamed to be British, well at least we do seem reasonable in some ways.

I read something on here I think quite near the start about how that we in the west have an expectation that we will live well into old age and that every problem has a solution. I remember a relative had a cancer diagnosis 15 years ago, the expectation was that it meant death and now (thankfully) in most cases people will recover and lead a good life, we vaccinate, insure everything from fridges to weddings and we kind of assume that we can buy a solution to most problems, I think on some level this is true and our experience of things that cannot be solved is limited. I think for some younger people this might explain the hysteria. My parents although not old have had their fair share of tough times and seem a lot more resilient to this than younger people

This is such a good post.

We are becoming increasingly risk averse with each generation. Medicine advances so that things that were fatal become either curable or treatable so that lives are extended. Technology means that cars are safer. Health and safety at work (whilst being much derided) has made huge increases in fatal or serious accidents and ensuing disabilities.

We rely on AI to screen our potential partners to filter out those with qualities that don't interest us, we sue the people that damage our property, we appeal bad exam results or re-sit them. All of this means a better and more secure quality of life, but it also means that it is totally disorientating and causes huge upset when something comes along which we can't control, or medicate, or sue, or appeal. We immediately want to know who is responsible - the council, the Government, the NHS, the school, the management - because the concept of having to deal with something that isn't someone else's responsibility, and which cannot be controlled or made to go away, is incomprehensible.

Spot the typo! That should read Health and safety at work (whilst being much derided) has made huge increases in reducing fatal or serious accidents and ensuing disabilities.

I think on some level this is true and our experience of things that cannot be solved is limited. I think for some younger people this might explain the hysteria. My parents although not old have had their fair share of tough times and seem a lot more resilient to this than younger people

I completely agree with this and would also suggest that the dementors have probably not had much life experience of bad shit happening to them, hence why they feel that everyone should cater to their fears, no matter how devastating the consequences might be.

I lost both of my parents at a relatively young age. I guess I have always felt that death wasnt something that just happened "to other people", it kind of shattered my innocence and made me realise that it can happen to ANYONE. Noone is special and noone is immune (pardon the pun) to death, illness and dying. Even though I would never have chosen what happened to me, it has made me resilient in the face of challenge and I had to grow up very quickly and face shit head on. Which is why I'm not paralysed by fear about going out and about. The worst has already happened to my family and so I feel like there is no point hiding inside your house living in fear for the rest of your life. Life is for living, quality of life is much, much more important than quantity.

Yes, Tappering. I work for one of the organisations you list and the number of people who take absolutely no personal responsibility at all when something goes wrong is unbelievable. It has to be our fault. And even if it isn’t we should sort it out for them and give them exactly what they want.

There are also so many conditions that have no cure, sometimes only can deal with the symptoms, MS and other neuro conditions for example, cancer treatment even now is not the answer, only extending life in many cases and coming with significant risks and costs...

Having experienced some of that first hand I guess might make you see things differently. Gets the risk of this, in perspective, and also how 'awful' it is. The invasive surgery of cancer, and ongoing treatment, might get into perspective the few weeks of an unpleasant virus. Which is what this is for most of us, if that. I've had several emergency open surgeries and that's very traumatic. But life saving.

God please can we lock them all in their houses
Fucking dementing twats
The world will be a nicer place even with covid

MagdaS I've line managed new employees before (as in school leavers and new graduates). Over the last few years that there's a noticeable increase in young people that respond very badly to constructive criticism. They find it very difficult to cope with not being the best, or the fact that they might have done a bit of a shit job and need to get better. Within that, a further group of people who cannot deal with being told 'no'. With one memorable occasion where I was contacted by someone's mother, who was telling me off for not authorising her son's (age 23) annual leave!

That's not to say that all young adults are like this. But it's increased to the point where it really sticks out, and my firm has amended its interviewing approach as a result.

after a while things go back to a sort of normal for survival, there is an impact and sometimes things change
Cholera John Snow public sewers and water supply
it is interesting to read of how people dealt with this stuff in the past
Samuel Pepys and bubonic plaque great fire of London new building regulations
even 9/11 new checks on planes but some people were nervous to fly again but within a few months at most passenger numbers were back to pre 9/11 numbers
also read article that was quoting C S Lewis in an address to students at Oxford University at outbreak of WWII when it seemed pointless to study and why it was worthwhile even if folks were dying daily
after this I think peope will change supply chains in NHS; PPE will be stock piled a bit more, no more just in time though that is better for budgets
I think there home working at least part of the time will become more acceptable in the office based industries and for workers wanting better home/life balance and cutting down commuting time, the need for big central offices and maybe complete open plan will be less popular people going in maybe twice a week and not necessarily 9-5. Working from home will become easier too when not childminding supervising school at same time
But other things will get make to normal in months all kids being at school every day ( the part time thing will last a few weeks) eating out, cafes, shopping, theatres churches etc

I think it’s the wider impact too not just the deaths, I know the last financial crisis wasn’t that long ago but for those caught up in it it was devastating. The dementors don’t like us to mention the economy as as it’s only about direct covid deaths but the reality is loosing your income/home is awful and life changing.

I thinks it's something to do with families not living together anymore. Most of us are shielded, sorry about that word, I know it's overused in a different aspect, from the realities of getting older and dying in a practical way, not just living through tragedies. Granny is in the care home, and one day we will visit, just not now, but if she dies now how are we going to do that? Her life is worth millions, billions, the whole of our GDP because that's economy, and economy is abstract, even though Granny wasn't worth our Sunday afternoon last December.

Through my work I know people are coming to harm physically and mentally due to not accessing medical services or the services simply stopping
I'm aware of people at risk of irreversible damage to their sight and being admitted after a suicide attempt due to the withdrawal of services to support a mental illness six weeks ago . And that was just today in work
Isolation is a massive problem. If it wasn't an issue why do so many charities spend millions on services to try and minimise the impact
People are dying of loneliness and treatable illnesses
We have to find a balance
We have to find a way forward

Yes Chardonnay, another example of it being someone else’s problem.

in fact I'm sure there must be an overlap between people demanding everyone stays at home and demanding they get to go to the tip...
I saw something recently that said "people who want the lockdown to finish, don't want to go to work; they want someone else to so that they can get their hair/nails done"

I suspect a lot of the dementors wouldn't benefit from a CBT approach because they're being completely disingenous in what they say and aren't practicing what they preach.
More CBA than CBT?

I might buy her a little something to cheer her up and take her mind off things but I will be muting her on WhatsApp.
Don't forget to disinfect it for half an hour before you give it to her.

Just watching Andrew Marr and the top scientific analysts has said we are past the peak then later on in the show they are talking about the app they are bringing out which will help track it - but why if we are past the peak?
And they're assuming everyone has a smartphone to download the app onto.

Without over-sharing I'm a historian by background & I agree that life in the contemporary developed world is remarkably risk free by historical standards. Believe me I'm not complaining about this, but it does leave us ill-equipped to deal with the abrupt emergence of a new risk. I remember people's anxieties about terrorism ten years ago & how completely out of proportion they were to the actual statistical risk.

it does leave us ill-equipped to deal with the abrupt emergence of a new risk. I remember people's anxieties about terrorism ten years ago & how completely out of proportion they were to the actual statistical risk

And is that good for us psychologically, I wonder? Nobody wants people to die needlessly, but there's a great Atlantic article floating around about childhood anxiety which looks at the critical negative role of parents adopting behaviours to shield their DC from anything that makes them unhappy or uncomfortable. It seems that with children, the best thing you can do for their mental health is not to protect them from things that make them sad or scared or uncomfortable, because if you do they never acquire the self-efficacy of knowing they can cope.

I grew up in Belfast in the 80s and as a consequence, terrorism scares me not at all. I can't personally predict it, I'm wildly unlikely to be personally affected by it, so the only thing worrying would do is to make my life smaller and sadder for no benefit. I'm grateful for that psychological inoculation. Even in hospital medicine today, tbh, there is often IMO a focus on life at all costs with no recognition that death can be a kindness and a merciful release. It takes a GP or someone who has worked in palliative care and seen death up close to understand and accept that it's a part of life and can be a positive thing. Can Covid help us find a new optimum level, where we avoid avoidable deaths but still understand that death is inevitable and risk cannot be avoided and must be balanced?

That’s a good point about the terrorism threat, I’ve always worked in London and never feared terrorism (even though I’ve come reasonably close to an attack) however lots of friends/family who don’t travel to big cities regularly and certainly not daily were very concerned that I wasn’t too bothered and carried on as normal. I think it’s hard to assess risk if you don’t ‘live’ it.

Did anyone see the news about the hospital in France which discovered they had a patient in December, and the other item about the woman in California who died of coronavirus in early February? It seems likely this has been floating around for a lot longer than first thought.

@willit I got called ‘astoundingly stupid’ for suggesting I may have had corona over xmas into early Jan as it was all the symptoms and most of my family had the same to some extent except my dp who I didn’t see for about a week due to working away.

That doesn't surprise me at all.

My work colleague just after Christmas was very poorly with symptoms exactly the same as covid.

If an antibody test does come out and is accurate I'd bet money she'd come back positive for having had it.

We all thought nothing of it at the time obviously but she was Ill for a good three weeks. Strangely though not one other member of our office caught whatever it was.

I know I've said it before, but it's odd how some posters are really panicking about the pandemic, but simultaneously quick to rubbish people who believe they've had it. It's like Covid-19 is somehow a huge threat on our doorstep but also a rare and exotic virus only caught by people somewhere else, or on the news