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Original poster

Posting here for traffic... Unconventional wedding

151 replies

Purplesndteal · 01/05/2020 10:49

After bagging my partner to get the ball rolling... We've agreed to have a fairly unconventional wedding. Our dog will play a major role and she'll even have guests. I'm.not wearing a dress and instead I'll be wearing ankle length smart trousers, converse, a t-shirt and my all saints leather jacket. He'll probably be wearing something similar. All t shirts will have tongue in cheek phrases in the vain of "I just got married and all I got was this lousy t-shirt". The guest one will say something like "just came for the open bar" etc...

Would people get it? Not that it matters but I don't what to end up with an "off" atmosphere if people don't get our extremely relaxed and jokey theme. Tia!

OP posts:
Pogmella · 01/05/2020 10:54

The mottos on t shirts move it from cool to cringe imho but it’s your day. If the dog’s involvement is key I’d mention that to venues right away. Our vicar eventually consented to DDog being in church (but she can’t ‘have a role’ the venue for the meal say it’s a flat no unless assistance dog.

KaptenKrusty · 01/05/2020 10:54

Yay! We did something similar and it was so fun (no dogs unfortunately)

Most people loved it - husband’s on her threatened to not come as it wasn’t in a church and what would people think etc - but we were paying my for it and stuck to our guns!

Best wedding I ever attended and most of our friends said the same!

Enjoy and just do what you want! :)

FabulouslyFab · 01/05/2020 10:55

It’s not my cup of tea but good on you for doing it your way 😁👍

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Cheeseycheeseycheesecheese · 01/05/2020 10:56

Sounds brilliant!!
Are the teeshirts favours out are they being given to the guests before hand to wear to the wedding?
Photos are going to be so cool!!!!

LolaSmiles · 01/05/2020 10:57

It sounded cool to me until you mentioned guest t shirts. I dislike cringey matchy guest things.

RaininSummer · 01/05/2020 10:59

Sounds fun but I wouldn't want to be told what to wear. The t-shirt as a gift if fine.

LesleysChestnutBob · 01/05/2020 10:59

It sounds like you're trying a bit too hard to be different - like you're way too cool for a traditional wedding. Which is fine if that's really your style but unless your friends and family are very similar to you there will be people who won't get it.

I think you'd have to warn people about the dress code so they would know what to wear and not feel out of place.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 01/05/2020 11:02

We're slightly undecided about the guests' t-shirts (it's all in flux). If we do give them as favours there would be a seating plan for the ceremony and each seat/chair would have one. I definitely want the t-shirts for us at least.

My hair goes between purple and teal and I don't know how I want to wear it. I don't want a DJ but rather some sort of PA system with just our Spotify playlist.

Would have to be in a garden/barn type venue and an open bar.

OP posts:
JoesExotic · 01/05/2020 11:03

I agree with @LesleysChestnutBob , it does sound a bit 'trying too hard to be alternative' and I'd probably roll my eyes if I were a guest but hey, you do you.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 01/05/2020 11:03

Oh and the invites would be like concert tickets.

OP posts:
nevertrustaninja · 01/05/2020 11:05

It's your day - wear whatever you like. It won't feel so relaxed for your guests if they are told what they have to wear.

Pogmella · 01/05/2020 11:06

Also if you’re having lots of dogs you would need to arrange for somewhere to dispose of their mess (sorry!) a lot of the ‘wedding’ barns are lovely but they won’t have loads of bins around so much as staff cleaning up and it obv wouldn’t be fair to hand them that!

Why don’t you do the shirts for the bridal party if you’re having one and suggest in your invites it’s a white tee theme- feel free to have a slogan. That way people who are petite/bigger can get a nicely fitted top.

DerbyshireGirly · 01/05/2020 11:07

Another vote for "trying too hard". Nothing wrong with a non-traditional wedding (in many ways mine wasn't traditional) but don't force it.

Pogmella · 01/05/2020 11:08

Oh just seen about concert ticket invites- google wedding festival/festival wedding- this is totally already a thing Smile there’s loads of ideas on Pinterest. We looked at venues that had yurts and stuff and could do wristbands for guests (not our cuppa but now I get why!)

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 01/05/2020 11:09

Well the t-shirt is the same principle of a concert one, you don't wear it at the concert it's a keepsake/souvenir. So no they wouldn't have to wear them.

Instead of a guestbook we though of having white t-shirts that people can sign with Sharpies.

OP posts:
rosiepony · 01/05/2020 11:09

If you have loads of similar minded friends it could be fun. If not and it’s mainly family and a few mates then a bit cringe.

You need loads of people to make this work. (Ditch the t-shirt idea though).

You don’t want it to be like those cringed Mumford & Sons type weddings (see YouTube)

LolaSmiles · 01/05/2020 11:10

The danger of guest t shirts is they just become another piece of clutter in people's homes or they get worn once and then add to the pile of single use clothing in landfill.

Unless you know your friends and family are going to appreciate a cheesy t shirt I wouldn't bother.

We had a chilled informal reception with Spotify over a PA system and friends have done similar, and they were all very enjoy days. Be careful not to lose the chilled vibe by trying too hard to be alternative.

nevertrustaninja · 01/05/2020 11:11

That's a nice idea - signing t-shirts rather than a guest book.

nevertrustaninja · 01/05/2020 11:12

'Unless you know your friends and family are going to appreciate a cheesy t shirt I wouldn't bother.'

Agree - would badges be better? You could leave them on the tables.
Perhaps a t shirt making table for the kids if you like the t-shirt theme?

ShagMeRiggins · 01/05/2020 11:13

I don’t think it’s trying too hard at all. Good grief.

It sounds like a fun, funny, and creative party to celebrate your marriage.

Pogmella · 01/05/2020 11:13

What about lanyards instead

Posting here for traffic... Unconventional wedding
Original poster
Purplesndteal · 01/05/2020 11:14

Well exactly we're not a Mumford and sons type wedding. It's not bohemian in the slightest. It would be more grunge like if I had to describe it.

I'm pretty sure 75% of the guests won't get it (I would say at least 1/3 are in their 70s and I wouldn't say that our friends are "alternative" apart from one do my friends who's a goth). We're not even that young (late 30s) but we know we would have had something similar if married in our 20s.

OP posts:
FlibbertyGiblets · 01/05/2020 11:16

No don't make guests wear t shirts.

The rest sounds great. Will you have bales of hay seating and twiggy shit bunting jamjars fairy lights? 🤩

Iwalkinmyclothing · 01/05/2020 11:16

I'd enjoy it :) I love relaxed weddings where the personality of the people marrying really shows through. For all the worrying people do about their colour schemes and table favours and menus and so on, standard weddings just blend into one for me and I can rarely remember what differentiated one from the other. Yours sounds like it would be fun, memorable and personal.

FlibbertyGiblets · 01/05/2020 11:16

Oh slightly crestfallen you won't. Boo!