If you could tell your single friend why they're single...

[GetMeTheScissors]

What would you say?

Built up the courage to ask and they all said 'you're great! You'll meet someone eventually!'

Which really wasn't constructive.

My friends used to tell me that I was too fussy/never gave anyone a chance. I had lots of attention but just never bothered taking it further or wouldn’t reply to messages etc. I was stuck on my ex

Because you have a combover and you talk and dress like you are from the 1930s.

You're a bit self centred and fake when you're trying to impress someone rather than just being yourself

(female) Often it won't matter how nice the guy is, if he hasn't been a mind reader then you get sulky. You say you have high standards and don't see why you should lower the bar. Most people think you're expecting an impossible standard that nobody can achieve.

(Female) Be more open minded about who you'll date. Your obsession with becoming a forces wife means you're choosing the wrong men for a silly fantasy.

One of my closest pals is single because she is too adaptable - she moulds herself into whatever the person she's dating wants her to be and it's great at first but then becomes very boring for them. Plus nobody can connect with the real her because she doesn't reveal it. I'm not even sure she knows what it is any more.

Because you won't let yourself relax & enjoy yourself, you don't show off your fun side and therefore men feel like they can't get to know you and you're keeping something back.

Because you have so so much going for you but you just throw yourselves at men at work and then you feel foolish for how you behaved while drunk. Just breathe! Be yourself; you're so lovely

“Genuinely, it is him not you - but you do need to stop picking men just like him. Please.”

Because, while I love her dearly and she is a really excellent, clever, ambitious person she wants a “gentleman”. Which is fine, except it has meant she repeatedly dates much older man who are just slightly younger versions of her dad. Who are stuffy, a bit sexist and honestly pretty dull. And don’t understand why she works so many hours. Or why she would want to keep working in future if she had a family...

Be realistic you don’t look like Jennifer Anniston so you are not going to get a Brad Pitt lookalike!

Because you are set in your ways, like doing parenting your own way and enjoy your family home and lifestyle just as it is so why would you need a partner, at least that's the impression you give. Fortunately I know you are happy like that.

Because although he's a fantastic guy, a great laugh, kind and generous.... I'm really sorry but he is a 2, maybe 3 in looks (nothing wrong with that) but will only ever consider an 8 or 9 woman. He won't even look in the direction of someone he doesn't think is model quality.

I don't mean to sound horrible because he really is my best friend and I adore him (platonically) but he is always friendzoned immediately by women. Me included but we've known each other from childhood.

He expects a stunner to fall at his feet but he has never found a Keira Knightly or Cara Delevigne to overlook him being a balding, overweight 40 year old virgin.
He also does this thing where he declares how much he likes a girl he has befriended. He doesn't simply ask her out but asks her with the declaration of adoration and it's....... well it really puts the girls off.

I don't think there is necessarily a reason. My single friends are amazing.

I sort of agree with this but approaching from the other side - yes, I can think of individual flaws, quirks and issues with my single friends that could be off putting BUT I can also see very similar things in all my friends who are in relationships. A quick glance around shows that it's definitely not only the perfect who bag a partner, so I don't agree that there must be some reason that divides out the coupled up and the perpetually single.

You don't want to put in the effort involved in having someone else in your life. But I think you know that.

You need to stop chasing men who aren’t worth it and spend some time on your own with your kids and discover/realise how valuable you are in yourself. When you’ve done than you will (hopefully) have more self confidence to find a nice man you deserve

Because you keep picking doer-uppers and trying to fix them. It’s draining for you and always doomed to fail.

You are gorgeous and have so much going for you, but your self-esteem isn’t great and that’s why you keep trying to rescue these damaged men who are unworthy of you. 😢

Friend 1: obsessed with bloody cats. No space for a man.

Friend 2: looks too serious and doesn’t talk much on nights out. When she does talk, she tends to be on the melancholy side.

(I love them both and anyone would be lucky to have them).

You live in the middle of nowhere and don’t make any effort to go out and do something new to meet people. You aren’t going to meet nice guys sat at home on Plenty of Fish.

Everyone has flaws including those in relationships the smugness of lots of these replies is crazy.

I would say that sometimes is totally unrealistic expectations, they are trying to match their ideal of who they would like to be with a ready made person who is obviously looking for someone more real than imaginary.

Some of them are so damaged that they are horrible to nice potential partners just because they remind them of someone else.

Or they simply don’t make the effort, either to find the time and space to go out and find someone or because they think they will find someone that would love them as they are even when they let themselves go years and years ago.

It is a nasty completion out there, you really need to be very fit or incredibly witty to compete

‘You can’t ever accept things as they are in the moment, you’re always expecting to feel a strong connection too soon. You message a guy for a day and if you can’t see yourself marrying him, you give up!’

She's jealous of most other women so constantly puts them down and only ever talks about her job. Quite desperate so settles for being FWB although that's not what she wants to be. Very sad.

My sister. Much of what peachgreen said with the added you pretend to be whoever they want you to be, and they fade away when the mask slips and you obviously aren't that person. You also present a mostly false narrative about your family for sympathy which once the truth can be freely seen, leaves you revealed as nasty and a liar.

Being single isn't a flipping affliction fgs. Why is the aim always to find a partner and those that don't are judged like on here. Being single is NORMAL. Being in a relationship is NORMAL. They're just different circumstances. What a stupid thread.

My single friend is beautiful and kind and loyal and would be a devoted wife and mother if given the chance, but she won't stop feckin talking. 10 minutes in her company and most people want to kill her. I, however, have raised 2 autistic children so have mastered the art of tuning out the monologue while making it look like I'm paying attention.

My friend thinks love is like it is in the movies.

It's really not. She can't take the settled aspect of a relationship, as soon as anyone settles she checks out.