What would you do if you wanted a dog but your dh didn’t ?

[Lardlizard]

How can you make a compromise on that one

You can't.

So you don't get one.

'Borrow my doggy' on occasional weekends?

I'd LTB obviously it's the only answer.

I am kind of being light hearted, but if it is a major deal breaker that may actually be the only answer, sorry

You don't get a dog.

You don’t.

Depends why they are against it. Is it a tempory no due to circumstances or do they hate dogs?

Dogs are a huge responsibility and it really needs you both to be on the same page.

Depends why he doesn’t want them.

Doesn’t like dogs: you don’t get one
Doesn’t want the hassle: you promise all hassle will be yours.

This is the position in our house.

We don't get a dog

I wouldn't get a dog.

They are a massive commitment and deserve more from their home than one person who actively doesn't want them there. I actually thing I would split up with someone over this. Making such a huge, long term commitment for the household against the expressed wishes on one partner would be a deal-breaker.

Volunteer at Dog's trust, join Borrow My Dog, do stuff that allows you to interact with dogs but don't bring one into your home when your partner objects.

Don't get a dog.

Next compromise - get an older rescue dog that won't live so long so it becomes eg a 5 year commitment not a 15 year one?

You don't get one. Obviously

I'd discuss it with him and try to find out his reasons against, but if he is adamant then we wouldn't be getting one, as if one person doesn't want a dog then you shouldn't get one. It's something you both have to be in agreement about.

I'd get a dog

Following as I am your DH in this situation. DH and I had a loose arrangement that we would get a dog when our youngest child started school. When it came down to it I put it off but eventually realised I couldn’t do it. I don’t want a dog. I never wanted one but thought I could do it. I finally have some hope of getting organised in life now the kids are older and, as someone who is not a fan of the toddler stage, cannot go back to basically having a permanent toddler for ever. I will always have let him down and would understand if he wanted to split up over it. I’ve said we could get one when he retires in the future but for now, almost all the work would be on me, so it’s a no. I do feel horrifically guilty about it but not guilty enough to ruin my life or my sanity over it.

My DH and eldest DS both want a dog. If DH ever brought one home I would leave.

I am not a dog fan really but it is more about the commitment a dog requires and I 100% know that everything about that dog would somehow end up becoming my responsibility.

Why do you want a dog?

Why doesn't he?

They're a lot of work and shelters are full of dogs abandoned by people who didn't realise it. And different dog breeds (and individual dogs) suit different folk. At some point in the future I'd love a dog but right now we don't have the space or the time to spare. So we're doing our research now on which breeds might suit us. Small spaniels, greyhounds, Heinz 57, yes; labradors and retrievers, lovely but just a little too big; chihuahuas and other handbag dogs, not in a month of Sundays, thanks.

As others have said, if you're keen for doggy company volunteer at your nearest shelter - if it's anything like ours, they'll be desperate for dog walkers and assistance.

Everyone has to be on board before you get any pet, there is no compromise unless you want to volunteer with the cinnamon trust or a local dog rescue shelter

We’ve got a dog.

I wanted one, OH didn’t.

Not because he didn’t like dogs but because he didn’t want all the hassle involved with owning one. We agreed that I could have one but any dog related duties were all on me. So walking, vets/bills, feeding, etc.. Dog is 5 years old, we had her from a puppy and OH adores hers but I’ve stuck to my agreement and am in charge of everything to do with her which has worked very well for us.

If DH brought one home I would leave. It wouldn’t be my home with a dog in it

I wouldn't get a dog if DH didn't want one.
I have been desperate for one for years but realise that I would need support as I work compressed hours which means, for me, I get 3 days off I work 4 long ones. It's not fair to get DH to be at home to take a dog out, cut short his working day(he is self employed ), look after it when I am away when he hasn't signed up for it.
I would hate having an animal in the house that I didn't want so respect DHs stance on us us not having a dog. He love s dogs by the way and always had one growing up but his mother was at home during the day and loved going out walking.

My DP didn't not want a dog exactly, but he certainly wasn't particularly keen. I work from home and he works long hours, so he did understand it was nice for me to have the company / impetus to get out of the house each day. He loves the dog a lot but I do the majority of the work, as is fair. We got an older rescue. I'd like another but I'm not pushing it.

Dh and 3 kids would like one. I don't want one so we won't be getting one. I'm at home all day so I'd be the one left with the dog. I don't want the hassle of walking it, cleaning up after it, extra house work a dog may create etc.

Foster one and hope he falls in love with it and wants to get one. That’s my plan. Foster dog comes on Wednesday 🤞 hopefully it works 😂

Sorry OP, you don't get one in that situation.

Could you volunteer at dog walking charities or your local shelter and get your fix that way?

I've had this issue with a partner. I was the one who desperately wanted a dog. I'd had 2 previously, however not without problems.

One side of me could see how tying it was, how we could not be spontaneous, we would worry about if we could stay out more than 3-4 hours, we knew no one to have a dog at short notice, holidays restricted, etc. etc.

It therefore came a choice between the relationship, being free, carefree, stress free and years of full commitment to a dog.

I chose the relationship. I am so very glad I did. Just my personal experience.