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Original poster

Innocuous conversations that you have overheard that have stayed with you...

351 replies

drownininplaymobil · 20/02/2020 15:26

When my dc were pre-schoolers, I was in some toilets in a church, wrestling various small humans with their pants/handwashing etc.
A student (I think) came in and said to her friend "My hair felt weird so I thought I'd come and have a look at it in the mirror".
I can remember at the time wondering when the last time was that I had time to look in a mirror other than when I was brushing my teeth. And slightly resenting the fact that this gorgeous young thing had the freedom to just saunter about noticing how her hair 'felt'.
Such a small throwaway comment but it really stuck with me. Anyone else?

OP posts:
BriefDisaster · 20/02/2020 15:57

I was in a cafe once years ago and there were two terribly posh older ladies sitting behind me. Just as I was leaving I heard the line .

"Yes he is vegetarian, well he will eat bacon and sausages if I make them but he is a vegetarian"

It was so strange it has always stuck with me.

AnotherDFSsale · 20/02/2020 16:02

In a toilet cubicle in a local pub, aged 18. Overheard a girl talking to her mate about a lad she was shagging ... "I think I love Lee but he loves Sally and their baby, Emily"

I was Sally. My boyfriend was Lee. Our newborn was Emily.Hmm

NetballHoop · 20/02/2020 16:04

On the district line from Wimbledon in London, two tourists chatting away, one asked the other "is this the tube or the underground?"
They decided that it must be the tube as it wasn't in a tunnel. I got off before the train entered a tunnel which was a shame as I wanted to know how the conversation developed.

Xmasbaby11 · 20/02/2020 16:04

Old woman on bus:

I went into hospital with 2 eyes and came out with half!

catinb0oots · 20/02/2020 16:06

Ooh this thread has been done before and there's been some real funny ones!!! Might be in classics??

AnotherDFSsale · 20/02/2020 16:09

I always remember overhearing a school run mum telling her friend in the playground that she was experiencing some issues with her son at school hitting and swearing at other kids and said "I don't know why he is so violent, I mean whenever because when he hears me swear and repeats it, I crack him"ShockConfused

Problem. Right there.

AnotherDFSsale · 20/02/2020 16:10

Random "because when" popped up on predictive!

MissisBee · 20/02/2020 16:11

About 25 years ago, walking through the town centre behind a family - mum, dad and a boy of about 4. Mum turned to the wee boy and said "where's the big bag David?" Turns out David had abandoned a bag of shopping in some unspecified location. It's a family thing now to say "where's the big bag David?" if anyone is looking for a bag.

Dizzygirl00 · 20/02/2020 16:15

Group of teenagers around 18 years of age, one has a baby with her, her friend says to her “do you sometimes forget you’ve got a baby” she replies - “yeah I do until she cries” 😳

DobbyLovesSocks · 20/02/2020 16:15

@AnotherDFSsale what happened?

balonzz · 20/02/2020 16:19

I remember when I was with a child, I was walking along the street with my family and there was another family walking towards us, headed in the opposite direction. The father was hitting a small child on the backside as they walked, and when the child started crying, he hit the child again and said 'stop crying'. Even as a young child, I felt the injustice and cruelty of this, and this memory has stayed with me forever. I wonder if that smacked child remembers this episode?

balonzz · 20/02/2020 16:20

when I was a child, not with a child

IPityThePontipines · 20/02/2020 16:25

Years ago, sat on a train, listening to some girls talk about a friend's boyfriend and how he'd put all her going out clothes in a big pile and set them on fire.

I really wish I'd said that they needed to tell their friend to leave him asap.

Mycatismadeofstringcheese · 20/02/2020 16:28

Walking along on a beach in UK and heard a woman say in a very posh voice, “Tell James we’ll have hot buttered toast and tea when we get in”.

I thought hot buttered toast and tea sounded lovely and wondered if James was their family butler who was going to serve them all or a family member who was hungry and wanted to know what food was available.

Twickerhun · 20/02/2020 16:29

Going on a train in SW London past a cemetery. One girl to another
‘My grandma is buried in there’
Other girl ‘oh it looks like a really nice cemetery’

yumscrumfatbum · 20/02/2020 16:39

In a park with my children, a very well spoken lady called out to her child in a very loud voice "Matthew, mind your penis!". I now like to call this out to DH if he approachs any physical task with any level of enthusiasm.

RedWineForMePlease · 20/02/2020 16:45

About 10 years ago I was back in my hometown and overheard two women come out of a shop and it's stuck with me ever since.

'Shall we pop in and see Maureen?'
'Oh no, she was really miserable with me last time I saw her'
'Well... you did sleep with her husband'

ladycarlotta · 20/02/2020 16:47

I passed a woman saying to her kids, 'you're properly moisturised. That's how I want you to look.'

BarkandCheese · 20/02/2020 16:49

Sitting on a bus I overheard a mum tell her small daughter “you mustn’t kiss Sally on the mouth, she’s got germs”. Fair enough, Sally was clearly a pet of some kind and kissing animals on the mouth is rarely a good idea. However a few moments later the mum said something which made it clear Sally was in fact a human person not a pet, which left me with so many unanswered questions.

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow · 20/02/2020 17:03

Years ago I was with my dc at the local paddling pool. Two women near me were chatting about their kids who were in the pool. “How have they been this holiday?” “ Yeah, good, the doctor says another week and the impetigo should be all clear.”
Much like the pool was in about 2 seconds.

AnotherDFSsale · 20/02/2020 17:08

@dobbylovessocks

I was talked out of confronting her by my lovely sister. Stayed with the bastard for years after that because I didn't want to believe it, and because he made me feel like I was imagining it🙄 Live and learn....

Jellybeansincognito · 20/02/2020 17:09

Oh my goodness @AnotherDFSsale That must’ve been absolutely awful.

Halestorm · 20/02/2020 17:15

From the Overheard in Dublin twitter.

Two very elderly ladies waiting at the bus stop and one asks the other if she saw the Deila Smith cooking programme on TV last night.
"I did" she says in a broad Dublin accent "but she's an awful cunt for the butter"

Abelino · 20/02/2020 17:16

Overheard two men in their 20s, chatting in M&S: "Turns out, she was shagging the barrister!"

numberonecook · 20/02/2020 17:17

teo spring to mind

i once got on a bus and the two ladies behind me were chatting one said 'What did he put his finger in there for?'
'i dont know but he said it stank'
'oh our stop is next, come on'
always wondered what he put his finger in? Blush

The other was in a supermarket, two elderly gentlemen (in their 80s at least) talking about who would be best to take on a second date, irene with the perm or shirley with the big breasts! lol