Shit food I've made this week

[managedmis]

Made a chicken and broccoli quiche, cottage cheese instead of yummy cheddar - shit

Also made meatballs a la Italian - put red lentils in that haven't cooked properly so there are still nutty little bits - shit

Any cooking fails for you this week?

Oh yeah I also made fajitas last night : added too much chicken stock cube - salty as fuck, so also shit

I made a Lloyd Grossman tomato risotto, had docs appointment and was really looking forward to it being quick and tasty.
Tasted like pish, got powder everywhere and burnt my lip.

Fuckoff Grossman.

Disgusting gravy. I can’t make gravy to save my life

Now you've got me worried. Tomorrow I shall attempt fish pie. Bits of frozen fish mix. A packet of cheese sauce and a tub of mash. It might be alright . I hope so! Can't make it tonight as I am working until 8pm and the last episode of Cold Feet is on at 9!!!

Smoked haddock pilaf, tasted of nothing yet was weirdly spicy. Rank

Oh Basil I'm the gravy/sauce champion.
It's my best ability.
I can ruin most things, fried eggs, steak etc but my gravy is boss.

I had lots of freshly left over paxo type stuffing.
I bunged it into tonights gravy which accompanied the roast chicken.
It made the gravy thick and full of stuffing instead of thin and next to the stuffing.
Both kids, who really like both stuffing and gravy nearly vomited.
(tbf, they both have ASD and you just cant change anything, so I dont know what i was thinking anyway). Ho hum.

Vegetarian chilli - I tried to fry chilli flakes at the beginning the way I do chilli seeds - foul.

Next time save it and either make toad in hole with stuffing balls or mix it with suet and srf for dumplings.
Dumplings are best.

The omelette of 'orrible at lunch. It was one of those, i'll use up some left overs, save money and be healthy brain waves. God knows what I did to it but it tasted like soil. Old withered spring onions, tomato, mushroom and a wrinkled pepper. I binned it and ate Nutella straight from the jar... A lot of it.

Ugh a savoury vegetable crumble. Like having tasteless vegetables with sawdust on top. Felt sick afterwards and still do at the thought of it...

Didn't cook last nights new potatoes enough , they were a little bit crunchy to say the least , we didn't eat many ( but filled up on a big chunk of non- failure homemade cheesecake -yum !)

I made a “flexitarian” turkey keema dish which sounded odd in the recipe in the first place, which should have warned me off. Half and half red lentils and turkey mince, okra, peas and spices in a combination I’d never heard off. The mince ended up grey because it was so low in fat that it boiled rather than fried, the okra made it strangely viscous and it was both bland and too chilli-hot simultaneously.

I’d much rather have had either a nice dahl or roast turkey, separately.

Toad in the hole, decided to put an entire onion in, batter didn't cook properly, ended up with a eggy, oniony mess, Fortunately I had pre-cooked the sausages so it wasn't a total disaster

Made a left overs curry.
It looked like sick, and didn't smell much better!
Binned it...

Made a disgraceful spagetti Bolognese. Over cooked the pasta, made the sauce from scratch (nice enough) and added own brand meat free mince which was 😷😷🤢 just had a handful -or several- of grated cheese and had to dump most of the rest in the bin

Made a spaghetti bolognese on Monday and the sauce was way too watery, had to drain off the plates before we ate. Made these healthy snack kind of bars yesterday, a bit like flapjack. Packed with loads of tasty things and they are disgusting. Husband and kids hate them, I’m going to have to eat it so it’s not wasted. Very filling at least, once you’ve choked them down.

We were playing freezer roulette - I knew that there was one delicious bolgnaise in there and one adequate.

It was the adequate that I defrosted and it was even more bland than I remembered

I love this thread. I am normally pretty OK at cooking but last night I made a vegetarian lentil moussaka. Was just meh-mc-meh. a bit shit

Trouble is cos I over estimated how much lentil mush to make I ended up making 2 of the fuckers so we have to eat it again at some point. Would be tempted just to bin moussaka-two if it wasn't for the food waste.

I let my 6 years old choose tonight's meal as a treat so we had super noodles and chicken goujons
Not too bad taste wise tbh but definitely shit nutritionally!

@Deathraystare Cold Feet was on Monday?!

I made a tomato sauce with lovely sausages and was going to have it with pasta. I made an impulse buy of gigantic pasta shapes from Aldi for a treat and they were disastrous together. Wrong type of pasta for the sauce. Two good items spoilt and there's leftovers that I'll probably bin. Would have been fine with the pasta I'd already got in. .

Not me but husband (who is generally a great cook, not to gloat) - came back all excited from a walk on which he'd gathered some wild garlic. Proceeded to make pesto - thought it would be delicious but such a pungent, overwelming taste. Unpleasant to say the least. I still had the taste in mouth when going to bed after brushing and strong mouthwash. Will stick with basil pesto next time...

@drogonssmile OMG now I want super noodles

The chicken fajitas I made weirdly also tasted like fish too.. I used to be a good cook!