Caroline Flack found dead

[LittleScottish]

Poor, poor woman...

i thing its good to talk about mental health and abuse as weve seen on here it happens more than we think

I guess I just think about how any friends and family would feel reading this stuff three days after their loved ones suicide. Their loved one being the title of the thread.
I don’t disagree that it’s helpful to talk about mental health but possibly not on this thread.
Feel free to call me the thread police etc. But this its nearly full anyway.

I really dont think theyd be reading mumsnet at this time sparkling

I totally get you Sparkling. This is a special set of circumstances I think, with the tangling of MH & alleged DV & social media (‘special’ isn’t quite the correct word but I can’t think what the right one is). It’s the very rare case where the CPS feel compelled to give a public statement, as they did the other day explaining their process.

You seem very sure @GabsAlot but you don’t know! Easily Googlable if you wanted to. Let’s hope not though.

I really dont think theyd be reading mumsnet at this time sparkling

Naive. They don’t have to be reading mumsnet to come across this thread. A google search would bring it up. Plus I bet some of her friends are on here.

Exactly @NoSauce.

Sparkling it's talk about all over the Internet. Not just mumsnet.

As said, people process things differently. And that's fine. What's not fine is telling people your way is the right way and that theirs are wrong.

I think we get you don't like it and feel it's distasteful, but you need to accept other process things differently to you and have a different opinion. People shouldn't be made to feel bad about this,

As a pp said, if you struggle with it, then for your own mental health it is maybe better to stay off the threads, people are behaving respectfully. Anything disrespectful needs to be reported, but discussing it in itself is not disrespectful.

Right now it's being discussed everywhere, from the media, to social media, to Internet forums, to celebs, to friends, to acquaintances. It really isn't just mumsnet that people are discussing it.

I didn't know anything about her till the news about her suicide.
She seems to have had a lot of friends.
Very sad that she didn't have enough support to help her through the court process and out the other side. If she had mental health problems it it might have been the push she needed to get proper help and address her problems.

I don't struggle with it because of my own mental health. Just from a compassionate point of view.
I have been surprised by what is being discussed on MN that's all, as that's the forum I look at.

I am well aware that others process things differently. I am also allowed to post how I feel.

She seems to have had a lot of friends
Very sad that she didn't have enough support to help her through the court process and out the other side
Suicide has nothing to do with how much support or friends you have. She had a friend staying with her at the time of her death.

I feel so conflicted every time I think about this.

One one hand, it’s beyond sad that a young woman, who had so much going for her, felt like she had no option but to die. That is a tragedy.

On the other hand, all this “be kind” stuff everywhere is making me feel a little uncomfortable. Of course we should be kind wherever possible. But, I’m concerned about the impact of this message on people in abusive relationships. (I know she hadn’t been found guilty, and there is clearly so much more to the story - but the fact is that, in the moment he dialled 999, her boyfriend believed she was attacking him.)
Are people saying you should be kind to your abuser and not call the police / seek justice in case they kill themselves? Threatening suicide is a form of emotional abuse. I’m genuinely worried how victims of such abuse will interpret these messages.

I suppose both things can be true. It is a tragedy she killed herself AND it’s important that victims of abuse feel able to access support. I just don’t think all the speculation and media scrutiny is going to help anyone in this case.

@Sparklingbrook Sorry to break it to you but I very much doubt that 3 days after her death her friends and family are perusing the MN fora.

@Sparklingbrook Would you?

Maybe if my loved one was famous, yes. And I was a poster on MN anyway. But everyone's absolutely sure that they aren't looking so that's ok.

TheMaskedTulip do you really think that none of her family and friends are on the internet AT ALL at this time?? That they aren’t reading what’s being written about their relative/friend??

Why are you trying to shutdown debate and scrutiny? As it’s been pointed out to you repeatedly that people process events differently. If you feel uncomfortable or delicate reading this thread then I can only advise that you stay away. However many, many people are currently suffering MH and DV issues. To deny them an outlet to speak freely without criticism is to deny them a voice or help. I find that terrible.

I just don't understand this derailing. Caroline is all over the media and Internet, from articles written giving opinion, to discussion forums, to her friends commenting, to acquaintances commenting, to even celebs, it's even discussed in the news. It is literally everywhere.

Nothing disrespectful is being said on mumsnet. Nothing different is being discussed here. As long as people continue to be respectful then I see no issue here in discussing it. It is not something Unique happening here.

@NoSauce There is nothing unique about MN or this thread that makes me believe that 3 days after her passing they are logged on a reading. It’s simple really, if the thread makes you uncomfortable then stay away, or if you decide to stay then report any abusive posts that you come across. Personally I’ve seen nothing on here apart from a disparate group of individuals trying to understand and process her tragic life and death.

They don’t have to be logged on to MN to see this thread. I often search some random thing that brings me to MN. And plus, you couldn’t possibly know whether her family and friends aren’t reading MN 3 days after her death. Just because you don’t think they are doesn’t make it true.

But what is the point you're making? There is nothing different here than everywhere else, there is nothing disrespectful, in fact this forum has been very tame in comparison to others. Her family just have to look at the news or media to see people commenting.

You're posting like something different is happening here, it's not. People should not be prevented discussing it if that's how they process things.

What is the point that's being made? Her family might see it, like the might see the news, media articles, friends and acquaintances commenting and opining? Yes they might.

Prescription medication + self medication (alcohol/drugs) = the perfect storm.

Police filmed her at 5am on a bender. Her career was over.

It's really that simple. Not the media, not the CPS, not her BF.

But what is the point you're making?

I’m not making any point. Just responding to those saying it’s unimaginable that Caroline’s friends and family aren’t reading MN at this time.

@toria70 her friend left to go to the shops and by the time she came back she was dead, so I highly doubt it was related to her prescription medication.
What are your sources about the police filming her at 5AM??